I would just like to thank all of you for being so patient with me and offering your support and condolences. I really appreciate it. As for this chapter I really hope ya'll like it and please let me know what you think. Thanks for everyone who has reviewed this story and happy reading! :)
Chapter 20: Just Wow
After hearing Justin’s heartfelt speech my mind can form only one word. “What?” I sound so intelligent don’t I? Not to mention the stupified look on my face. My mouth is hanging open and I’m not sure but I think I might be drooling and if I’m not I’m sure I will be soon.
Did you know he was going to say this stuff to me? I can’t believe you knew and didn’t warn me! Jeeze…
Okay, so help me out here. How exactly am I supposed to react this new revelation? Do I just say okay and move on to a new topic or do I lunge at him and kiss him till I can’t breathe anymore or I could just sit her like I am and stare at him until he starts talking again. I really don’t know what to say. I always heard people say that they were speechless before but I never really got it. I mean how can you not have anything to say? Now I get it though and I can tell you that I am completely and most definitely speechless.
Why isn’t he saying anything? He can’t just say he wants to kiss me and then just leave me hanging. Right? That’s just wrong and”and mean. He’s not even looking at me. He’s just looking at his damn sneakers.
God, I’m so f**king confused right now! Where did all this come from and if he’s been feeling like this for so long why didn’t he tell me sooner? But then again I’ve sort of had some feelings like this for him too and didn’t say anything. But I couldn’t say anything. I was too afraid I would lose the only person I have. I never thought in a million years Justin would be attracted to someone like me. And a relationship would be extremely difficult and awkward. Not only would it just be strange to date someone after being such close friends with but I have certain….limitations; in other words, sex. Dr. Jones told me I could still have sex and I could still enjoy it somewhat but I would just be lying there motionless while he……I think you get the picture.
Of course I wouldn’t just jump into bed with Justin either. I’m no slut. Oh goodness, here I am worrying about a nonexistent sex life with Justin and we have yet to discuss”anything.
“Justin,” I hear myself say. When he doesn’t look up I call his name again. My heart melts when I see the anxious look on his beautiful baby face. He must be terrified of my reaction.
Okay now that I have his attention what do I say? I should have prepared something before I called his attention to me. So I say just what’s running through my mind at this very moment. “I don’t know what to say.”
His gaze returns to his sneakers and I can’t resist an eye-roll. I need more to go on here than just the fact he wants and/or has wanted to kiss me. Is he expecting something to come from this? And if he is what is he expecting?
“What do you want me to say?” I whisper trying to crane my neck to get a look at his face but not having any such luck. He shrugs wordlessly. “So you told me that stuff for no reason?”
He runs his nimble fingers over his shaven head before looking back up at me again. “I told you what I did because you made me. I didn’t want to tell you but you know me too well for me to be able to get away with lying to you.”
I think I should be offended by that.
“I don’t want you to feel pressured to return my feelings.”
“What exactly are your feelings Justin? You said you want to”kiss me but I need to know what that means.”
“What it means, Mackenzie,” He says, his features brightening considerably, “is that I don’t see you as just my friend anymore. You mean so much more to me. I was so scared to tell how I feel because I know all that you’re going though and that you need to focus on getting better and a relationship would only complicate things plus I don’t even know how””
You remember when I was trying to decide how to act and one of my options was to just lunge at him and kiss him till I couldn’t breathe anymore? Guess what I chose? I had to stop his ramblings.
I throw the top half of my body at his, blindly pressing my lips to his very shocked ones. He doesn’t respond at first but after a few nudges from me his lips cautiously begin to move against mine. His hands move to my back to pull me closer as the grip I have on his biceps tighten.
All I can say is…damn. If you’ve ever imagined kissing Justin Timberlake, which I have, I would take that fantasy and how amazing of a kisser you think he would be and multiply it by like a gazillion. I can’t even begin to describe to you how amazing it feels to have his lips moving against mine; and he’s doing this thing with his tongue where he rolls it….I should stop there shouldn’t I? Too much detail right?
Once I get the point where I can no longer breathe and must come up for air we pull apart. We’re both panting heavily and starting directly at one another; he’s not looking at those damn sneakers now is he?
“You were rambling.” I pant trying to control my breathing. I can’t believe I just kissed him like that. Oh God it was wonderful! It was one of those seeing fireworks kind of kisses.
“Wow.” I hear Justin say, breaking me of my thoughts. “Just wow.”
“Yeah.” I agree. I don’t think my heart will ever return to its normal rate and I feel like I’m gonna puke; I mean that in a good way though. Puke like the way your stomach feels when you go on a huge rollercoaster; you know it feels like it drops to your ankles.
“I want to kiss you again.”
A huge….no the hugest (I don’t think that’s a word) smile takes over my face at his words. You should see his face right now. He looks f**king adorable and utterly happy. “What are you waiting for?”
~*~*~*~
“I’m not ready yet.” She whines from her spot in the passenger seat of my black escalade. She’s such a baby sometimes.
“What are you so afraid off?”
She scoffs and turns her head away from the window to glare at me. “I’m not afraid of anything. I’m just worried about what her reaction will be.”
I chuckle lightly and reach across the console to grab her hand bringing our entwined hands to rest on my right thigh. “Zee, my mom already adores you. She’ll be happy to hear about our new relationship.”
Our new relationship. I still can’t believe Mackenzie is my”my girlfriend; do I sound like I’m in junior high or what? I just never thought this would actually happen for us. I wasn’t even going to tell her how I felt but I’m so glad that I did and I certainly don’t regret it. Ha, and she practically dove on me! That was the best kiss I’ve ever experienced…..and I’ve experienced a lot of kisses; believe me.
“Are you even listening to me!” She squeals breaking me from my thoughts.
“Of course I am.” I say incredulously as though her question was preposterous and I've been listening to every word she has uttered. “I always listen to everything you say baby.”
“Apparently you don’t because I’ve told you over and over again during the short time we’ve been together that I hate it when you call me baby.” She states matter-of-factly. She’s such a smart ass sometimes. “And if you were listening what did I just say?”
This should be good. Let see if I can bullshit may way out of this one. “You were saying that you were really nervous about telling my mom about us. You said that this is different than the other times you’ve met with her because you weren’t my girlfriend then and you think she’ll be more critical of you.” I can tell by the look on her face I’m right. I’ve always been an f**king awesome guesser.
“You suck.” She pouts pulling her hand out of mine and turning back towards the window with her arms folded over her chest. “Now I am so going to tell your mom you make out with Enrique.”
I nearly slam into the car in front of me when she says that. She promised not to tell anyone about that. “I did not make-out with him Mackenzie. He kissed me.” I clarify through clenched teeth. “You tell my mother about that and I’ll””
“You’ll what tough guy?” She asks with a smart-ass grin. “What will you do Justin?”
I reach my hand back to hers pulling it to my mouth where I place a wet kiss before dropping it back into my lap. “Nothing, baby, I won’t do a thing.”
TBC......Changed my mind and decided to continue. Yay!
Number of reviews: 140
Print:
Chapter or Story