I examined myself in the rearview mirror and laughed. My dark brown hair was still wet and set on my head in a soppy bun. I usually wore minimal make-up and some lip-gloss, but I’d abandoned that idea when I realized we were 20 minutes late and counting.
Three weeks had passed and things were still the same. Though her CD was doing well, Brit continued to throw a fit every now and then; the first couple of tantrums weren’t so bad, but as time went on, she only got moodier. You can only imagine the effect this was having on me. I now sat in the driver’s seat bored out of my mind, listening to her fume about a magazine that chronicled the break-up and her tantrums.
“You should learn to empty yourself of bad vibes and just breathe deep breaths; or try counting to ten.” I offered, trying for the 5th time this morning to help her learn some ‘calming techniques.’ I know that someone out there is laughing at me, but Johnny had recommended Britney start seeing a shrink and it was my job to see that she obey the “doctor’s” orders.
“Just don’t talk to me right now,” Britney snapped back. Her hands flying to her temples, she added, “The last thing I need is someone who knows nothing about stress telling me how to deal.”
Oooooh, the nerve of that little wench. She wouldn’t survive half a day in my life doing my job for a certain overbearing, spoiled popstar.
Halfway to our destination, Britney was still whispering to herself and shooting death stares at those misfortunate souls who drove alongside us, just because. Obviously, she didn’t want to hear what I had to say, so I left her alone. I mean, who was I to tell her how to live her life? I was only her best friend since 2nd grade; the only girl to welcome her back to school after the Mickey Mouse Club. I’d only been her P.A. for 3 years. What could I possibly know about her life?
We arrived at WEG offices only 45 minutes late. Since her sessions were confidential, I wasn’t required to more torture. Besides, I figured she could handle herself like an adult for an hour, so I set off to my office. No, it’s not a typo. It was really my office. The thought hadn’t really sunk in yet, but I figured I should get used to it.
As I made my way down the hall, I heard a few people call out to D.C., but I wasn’t sure who they were talking to. I racked my brain going through a list of all the interns and business people with the initials, but I still came up empty.
“Hey, Terry, got any messages for me?” I asked when I reached the front desk.
Terry cocked an eyebrow and smirked. “They let you dress up the broom closet and you start asking for messages? You are delusional.”
Being the business savvy career woman that I am, I stuck my tongue out at him. “How’s Arnold?”
“His name is Arnez,” he shot back indignantly. “And he’s fine.”
“Don’t I know it?” Leaning over the desk, I asked, “Did they hire someone new? All I heard when I walked in was about D.C.”
“If you want to succeed in this business, learn to read the memos.” He continued to look at his computer screen. “They were talking about you,” he finally stated in a bored monotone.
“It’s short for Damage Control. You seem to be cleaning up Britney’s messes lately and it just kinda’ stuck.”
I opened my mouth to respond to the news, but I was interrupted by an inappropriate tap on my derrière. I turned around, ready to slap the perv- whoever it was.
“You really shouldn’t bend over in skirts that short.”
I smacked Justin playfully and turned back to Terry. “Such a gentleman, isn’t he?”
Terry looked him up and down from behind and smiled. “He can be my gentleman any night.”
I giggled at the horrified look on Justin’s face, mostly because he looked über cute and I couldn’t restrain myself.
“What feline dragged your ass into the office today?”
“My dear little kitten, I wanted to see more of you. And I got my wish.” Justin sat down and shot me an impish smirk. “You seem to forget, I work here, too,” he added, a little more serious than his past comments.
I tried to ignore him and began searching for a box of paper clips I was sure I’d put somewhere. “Well, it’s good to know that you decided to come back. We were going to start looking for a new resident sex symbol.”
“Is that what they call me around the office, kitten?” He added the last word with a small sneer. Dammit, less than 5 minutes and he already knew the latest and greatest way to annoy me.
By this time I was searching the bottom drawer of my file cabinet. I realized how entirely too short my skirt was. I could feel his eyes scanning my body. Either that or it was just wishful thinking.
I raised the box triumphantly and sat on the edge of the desk. “Mostly everyone just calls you Mr. Ego behind your back,” He looked seriously wounded at the thought, so I added, “but I like to think of you as the sex symbol around here.”
I need to stop right here and say that some of you may think that this was a little more than friendly banter; maybe we were even flirting, right? In hindsight, I should have known that this was going to end in only one way: disaster. Think I’m wrong- just overreacting? Keep reading, you’ll see.
We continued our little chit-chat for another 3 minutes or so, and then he checked his watch and sighed. He explained his real reasoning for being on the premises (meeting with Johnny) and admitted that he was already late as it was.
He left without incident, but not before promising to continue our nightly ritual of phone calls. I went back to pretending to have important work to finish.
I was sitting at my computer, hoping that someone- anyone- would e-mail me sometime soon. I spent 5 minutes organizing all of the files on my laptop, then another 10 correcting my mistakes. It’s very true, what they say: it’s easier to mess things up than it is to clean it up.
