Chapter 24: Tolerance
Is it pathetic that I wish the real Justin was lying next to me, stretched out on a striped beach towel instead of Trace? I know I’m supposed to be mad at him but I just can’t help myself. Despite my encounter with Allison at that beach party, I had a wonderful time with him. Of course I do make more of a fool of myself when he’s only half clothed. Then again if we’re sunbathing, with his eyes closed, like Trace I could look and blush all I want and he wouldn’t know the difference.
Don’t get me wrong, Trace isn’t bad to look at. He’s just no Justin Timberlake. Besides I don’t think of Trace as anything more than a great friend. And he has really turned out to be just that. He may just be a better friend than Justin or Liz. It’s weird though, when I first met him I would never have imagined being the way I am with him. He puts me at ease and I find myself telling him things I wouldn’t even admit to Liz. Like about my stupid crush on Justin; I had barely admitted it to myself when I confessed it to him. So in a way I guess I’m glad that is Trace beside me, even if I do have to call him by another name.
A low growl escapes my partner in crime as he rolls off his stomach to his side to face me. “Shit,” he hisses. “Am I burned? My back feels like it’s on fire?”
I sit up slightly to lean over him to look at his back. Dang, he’s red. Like lobster red. I told him to use sunscreen. He claimed he never burned and he needed the color. “You definitely burned.”
“Awe man,” He wines, “Is it really bad?”
I nod, “Really, really bad.” I bite my lip and reach my pointer finger out to poke him. He yelps in pain at the faint touch confirming just how badly his is burned.
“Oh, Justin, honey,” My mom gasps getting a glimpse of his back. “Didn’t you use any sunscreen?” Trace only groans in response. “Why don’t you come with me and we’ll get some aloe on that? I have some out in the car.”
I giggle at Trace pointing a taunting finger his way as he slowly stands up and staggers away at my mother’s side.
They’ve been getting along great all day. My mom’s taken him under her wing as if he were her own. It’s weird; a good weird though….I think. I think it’s kind of getting on Trace’s nerves though. He said that he gets enough motherly advice and such from his and Justin’s mom and the last thing he needs is another one.
My mom’s exact words where that she loved Trace…or rather she loved Justin, but she was really taking about Trace. She loves Trace pretending to be Justin. This is all getting rather complex and confusing. I feel like all I do anymore is make up lies to cover other lies. What has happened to me?
“Hey,” Steve interrupts my self loathing. I was hoping to make it through the rest of this afternoon without having to have a real conversation with him. I should have known he would pounce as soon as Trace was out of sight.
“Hey,” I echo, not really knowing what else to say to him.
“So you and Justin seem pretty close.” Here we go. Why can’t this guy just sit in silence? Why does he feel he always needs to be moving that big mouth of his? It’s quite annoying.
“We get along really well.” I reply suppressing an eye roll. It’s like a constant eye roll when he’s around.
“How well?”
I turn to him with raised eyebrows, surprised at his audacity. How dare he ask me something so personal! Just who does he think he is?
“I’m sorry,” He quickly apologizes before I get so much a grunt in. “I’m just”I’m trying really hard to get you to like me and”I’m doing a really crappy job.” He laughs. What is this guy on? “If I ever do something like that again, you know get to father-ish, just smack me.”
I offer a tight lipped smile and a small, forced chuckle. At least he realizes how he comes across and is trying to fix it.
“I know that you don’t really like me very much right now and I completely understand what you’re feeling.” Oh you do? “My mom and dad divorced when I was nine and I had to get used to a new mom and dad. I hated just about every person either of them brought home.”
They why does he force himself on me like this?
“I just wanted to let you know that I’m trying and I hope that you can at least try to give me a chance. I really like your mom a lot and she makes me happy and I think I make her happy too.”
“Do you love her?” I blurt out. Wow, where did that come from?
“I don’t know yet.” He answers earnestly, scratching the back of his neck. “I just got out of a messy divorce so we’re taking it slow.”
“Do you have any children?”
“A step son. His name is Brandon and he’s right around your age, eighteen.” I can tell by the look on his face he’s fond of this Brandon kid. He looks like, well a proud papa. Maybe Steve isn’t quite as bad as I thought. I still don’t like him, but I can at least tolerate him after this little talk. Hey it’s a step forward right?
~*~*~*~
“I hope you don’t think I’m gonna like cook for you or something.” I laugh as we pass through the picture lined hallway to the kitchen. Spending the day at the beach with Elli and her mom was great, besides the bad-ass sunburn I got that is. Her mom and Steve were really nice and I almost felt bad liking them seeing all the problems Elli tells me about.
Speaking of Elli, she was much more relaxed and at ease this afternoon than she normally is. I haven’t quite figured out why yet but I assure you that I’m working on it. Hopefully by the end of tonight I’ll be able to tell you what’s up. Her mom and Steve are going out to some fancy restaurant that we were invited to go to but we turned them down. Well I turned them down when I saw Elli silently pleading with me to. So Elli’s eating with me back at my place. Hopefully Justin won’t show up and if he does he’ll be with out Allison. I don’t think he would be that stupid as to see that ho again. He was drunk and stupid that night he slept with her; he’d have to be an idiot to do it again. Oh, can you imagine if Elli ever found out about their night together? She was upset enough when she saw them kissing!
“Trace, I’m hungry.” She whines tossing self on a bar stool by the island. “I’m the guest you have to make me something.”
“You come over too much to considered a guest anymore.” I laugh sitting across from her. She glares at me cutely before the room turns to silence. It’s not an awkward silence though; it’s comfortable. She makes me comfortable. I don’t know what it is about Elli but she just has this way about her that puts you at ease. Maybe it’s her shyness or humbleness or innocence or maybe it’s the combination of all these things. “You never told me what Justin said to you this morning while you were waiting for me to come downstairs.”
The faint smile she had been wearing falters. “I think I’ll make myself a sandwich. Would you like one?” She asks, not so smoothly changing the subject. She stands from her seat and walks across the room to the refrigerator. She quickly opens the door and sticks her head so far inside I’m afraid she won’t be able to find her way out. “What kind you want? Turkey, ham, bologna, a combination?”
“Elli, get your head our of the refrigerator.” I demand with a heavy sigh. She reluctantly steps back from the icy box with turkey and lettuce in hand. Dropping the contents in her hands to the island she moves back to grab the bread from the bread box. She returns to me and untwists the yellow twist tie from the bread, taking out four slices. “You never answered my question.” I persist.
She clears her throat awkwardly as she slaps a few pieces of turkey on the fluffy bread laid out before us. “He didn’t really say much.” She answers vaguely, still busying herself with the sandwiches. “He just apologized a lot and asked me if I got the flower he sent.”
“He sent you flowers?” What a lame ass punk. Couldn’t he think of something better than flowers? I mean he is Justin freakin’ Timberlake, he could have arranged something a little more extravagant then that. How pathetic.
“Yep.” She confirms handing me my sandwich which she so sweetly trimmed the crust off of and cut down the middle. “Two dozen yellow roses.”
“Your favorite.” I think out loud. That’s not quite as bad as I thought. At least he remembered her favorite flower. “Did he leave a note?”
“Yes he did.” She answers after swallowing. “He apologized again.”
“So did you forgive him?” I ask as nonchalantly as I can manage. I’m not sure what answer I’m hoping for here. In a way I want her to say that she has forgiven Justin because he is my best friend and I know that he really wants to get with Elli even if he’s too stubborn to admit it. But on the other hand he was an ass to both of us and I’m not sure he deserves either of our forgiveness. You see where I’m coming from here?
Elli shrugs her shoulders. Now she chooses to get all shy again. Sometimes this girl really stresses me out.
“Well did you or didn’t you?”
“I don’t know Trace! Should I? Is it too soon? Should I stay mad longer?” She whines, her words seeming to come out in fast forward. The poor thing looks completely confused.
What do I say? I can’t tell her how to feel. “You’re either mad at him or your not.” I answer with the only words I can come up with at the present time. I’m really not that great at this advice stuff.
“What if I’m still hurt but not really mad?” She asks warily.
“Then that’s how you feel.” I say back, finishing my sandwich. “Justin knows he screwed up and it’s going to take a while for you to get over it.”
Elli opens her mouth to respond but is cut off by the sound of the front door opening and slamming shut.
Justin’s home….
TBC.....I know I haven't responded to the reviews ya'll left from the last chapter but I did read them and appreicate each and every one. I just haven't had time to respond yet, but I will. PROMISE!! :)
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