He's magic and myth
As strong as what I believe
Finally. One night. He’s out on the town. But he’s with me. I’m with him. We’re together. A small part of me was hoping this was a small step in a big change. Maybe he truly was beginning to see his faults. When he told me to go get dressed, dressed for a special occasion, I was overjoyed. I ran upstairs, and put on a black dress. Long for elegance, and love. Short for sultry seduction.
When the waiter asked us if we wanted any drinks, he told him that he wanted water. After that, I couldn’t help but just look at him in excitement. Excitement of the future. Our future.
Our dinner was perfect. We just talked. Talked about our past. Our lives. New things that were suddenly discovered. It felt like our first date all over again. I was interacting with a different person. I had no complaints. I couldn’t even think of what our differences were.
As we walked out the door, and back on to the busy streets, our reunion was interrupted. I heard people whispering. I saw dirty glances. I felt a few shoves here and there. The one thing that was constant was his hand in mine, clutching each other tightly.
“Look it’s that lame boy band member.”
“What a fag.”
“He needs to get that nasty ass girl off his arm. She doesn’t deserve him.”
It was the cruelty in their tone. I looked up at him, and saw his lips pursed tightly together, and his other hand in a fist. His urge to yell and scream was being resisted. As much I wanted to fight back, I knew that the more we ignored them, the stronger we became together. And that’s what I desperately wanted.
With each step, we were closer to the car. But it felt like with every inch we moved, we were becoming mutually intact. All those words I could hear people saying. That’s all they were. Just words. And as I looked up at him again, I could feel my heart pounding with excitement, fear, strength, weakness, insecurity, confidence, and love. So many things. He made me feel everything.
As we reached our destination, he quickly pulled me to the passenger side of the car, opened the door, and gave me a light push to sit down. He shut the door, and ran around to the other side, trying to get himself out of the chaos and curiosity that surrounded his life. As his door slammed shut, he relaxed his shoulders, which were undoubtedly tense, and turned to look at me. Almost apologetically. Without saying anything, I leaned over and put my hand on his cheek. He leaned into it, almost like a young child.
I thought about the strength he had. But then, right here, I was witnessing his innocence, which was almost unseen. His life was such a roller coaster, than I could never understand how the rapid speed of being so high and worldly, and then the quick drop to the lowest point of your life, never made him sick. Sick of everything that was around him.
He truly was full of magic. Full of questions that I wanted to ask him so badly. How he did it. How he managed his life, with such confidence. I would never know. Because it was his secret. His secret that made him so amazing, that I never wanted to get off the roller coaster he took me on with him.
He's magic and myth
As strong as what I believe
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