“Young hearts, run free!”

Justin frowned and leaned back further into the couch as he heard Kate’s singing voice as she came into the house. She was way too happy. He lifted his head a bit to look at her as she danced into the room.

“Young hearts, be true to yourself, don’t be no fool.” She stopped as her eyes rested on him. “Alright, what’s your problem,” she demanded, putting her hands on her hips.

“Love troubles,” Trace answered for him. “What else.”

Kate gave Justin a sympathetic look. “Things are STILL bad? It’s been an entire week of this.”

Justin leaned his head back into the couch cushion and rested his forearm over his eyes. “Eight days.”

“Call a therapist, Justin. None of us are helping. Call a damn therapist.”

“She won’t go. I talked to her about it yesterday and there’s no way in hell she would go.”

“Hey, but you two talked? Well that’s good, right?”

Justin snorted. “Yeah.”

Kate looked over at Trace. “Okay, so what am I missing?”

“Justin didn’t have a very good morning,” Trace said, stretching his arms over his head.

“What happened?”

Trace started to talk but Justin cut him off.

“Okay, well last night when we got home from Mike’s, Brenna was in my room and she stayed there and we talked for a bit. She finally says that yeah, this isn’t just about her aunt. I tried to bring up going to a therapist again and she said no again.” He sat up straighter. “So we fall asleep and I’m thinking maybe this means things are going to get better since she came to me and she actually was talking. So we fall asleep and then when I wake up, she’s not there. She’s BACK in her room, in bed, crying AGAIN. And when I try and talk to her she basically ignores me. Doesn’t want me to talk to her or touch her or be anywhere near her. So last night I guess meant nothing and she’s right back to crying all the damned time and not telling anyone why.” He flopped back into the couch. “This is retarded.”

“I’m gonna go talk to her,” Kate said. “I haven’t seen her for a couple days. Maybe she just needs to see a new face.”

Justin closed his eyes as Kate left the room. “This is all messed up. I’m sick of this.”

“I know, man.”

“I’m tired of trying to understand when she won’t give me anything to go on. It’s like she’s intentionally trying to push me away.”

“Maybe she is.”

Justin opened his eyes and looked over at Trace who shrugged.

“It’s a lot easier to wallow in your misery when you’re alone and no one’s trying to make you feel better.”

“So she doesn’t want me to help her because then she won’t be able to stay like this?”

Trace shrugged again. “I dunno. Maybe.”

Justin shook his head and closed his eyes again. He was physically tired of everything. He had gone a week without hearing from her and then he had spent the past week trying to understand what was going on in her head when she clearly didn’t want his help. He wanted his old girlfriend back. He refused to go on like this.

“Where are you going?” Trace asked when Justin stood up abruptly.

“Upstairs. I wanna talk to her. I’m sick of this.”

Trace stood as well and followed him. “Maybe you should let Kate talk to her for a while. You got really mad when you tried to talk to her this morning. That’s just going to happen again.”

“I don’t care,” he said stubbornly. “This has to stop.”

Brenna didn’t lift her eyes as she heard a knock on her bedroom door. She continued staring at her fingers until the door opened.

“Hey,” Kate said, coming into the room and closing the door behind her. “I hear you had a tough morning.”

Brenna pulled her knees up to her chest. “It was the usual,” she said softly.

Kate sat down on the bed by her. “Okay, I hear Justin had a rough morning. What are you doing, Bren? How exactly do you want this to end?”

“I don’t know.”

“You know, Bren, I’m not as dense as Justin. There’s something more going on here, isn’t there? More than your aunt and more than your dad. I mean, why Justin? Why push away Justin? You seem to talk to me more than you talk to him and he’s your boyfriend and you live with him.”

Brenna felt her eyes well up with tears and she stared harder at the comforter she was sitting on.

“Is there something more that you’re not telling anyone?”

She wet her lips and raised her eyes to Kate’s. “There is something. I-” She stopped abruptly as her door opened and looked away from Kate to see Justin standing there, Trace behind him.

“This has to stop, Brenna,” Justin said, crossing his arms over her chest. “If you’re not going to talk to any of us, you have to go see a therapist. That’s just how it’s gonna be.”

The tears in her eyes fell. “I’m not going to a therapist.”

“Then…then I’ll admit you to a hospital and they’ll make you talk to someone.”

She felt her chin trembling. “I’m twenty three. You can’t admit me. I’m not a danger to myself or others.”

He closed his eyes for a brief moment and his jaw twitched a bit.

“Justin, maybe you should let me and Bren talk for-”

“Stay out of it, Kate!” Justin snapped, cutting her off. “We shouldn’t have to have someone mediate for us. I’m capable of talking to my girlfriend on my own!” He turned back to Brenna. “You’re talking to a therapist or I will have you admitted. I’ll tell them you said you wanted to kill yourself and they’ll believe me.”

More tears fell. “You can’t do that!”

He kept a steady gaze on her. “Watch me. You are not well, Brenna. Anyone can see that by just looking at you. You need to pull it together. Everyone is TIRED of this shit! I’m tired of trying to get you to talk and I’m tired of you ignoring me like I’ve done something to you!”

She began to cry as he yelled at her and she buried her face in her drawn up knees. Trace started to interject but Justin quickly talked over him.

“This has gotten way out of hand. Your mom wanted you here to get better but that’s still not happening and it’s been a week. And you don’t tell anyone what this is all about! Last night you said it wasn’t just about your aunt but you still won’t tell me what it IS about so I can’t help. I’m sick of waiting for you to decide to let me in on what you’re feeling. So either you talk now or go to a therapist. Which is it gonna be?”

He had said too much and at that point she couldn’t stop herself from lifting her head and speaking. “Drew and I kissed the day I left for Shelby Forest.”

The room fell to a dead silence and Brenna found herself unable to look away from Justin’s eyes, which were quickly turning cold. She bit down hard on her lower lip to keep her chin from quivering.

It was silent for at least a full minute before Justin spoke.

“What?” he asked in a slow and even voice.

She looked away form him, not able to answer. He had heard her. She didn’t need to repeat it.

He stared at her for only another moment before turning and leaving her room, slamming the door behind him, causing the wall shelf near the door to shake. A frame sitting on it fell to the floor and there was the sound of glass breaking.

Brenna’s tears continued to fall as she squeezed her eyes shut. Nothing was said until Trace mumbled that he was going to see if Justin was okay.

“You’re not lying, are you?” Kate finally asked.

Brenna rested her chin on her knees, knowing Kate already knew the answer.

“Shit, Bren,” Kate said softly. “What are you doing? Are you trying to get Justin to break up with you? Do you realize what you’ve done?”

Brenna breathed in a shaky breath. “I need to be alone.”

Kate shook her head and stood up. She left silently and Brenna laid down in her bed, burying under the blankets. If things had been messed up before, they were now. At least she was going to be left alone now. Now that Justin hated her, he wouldn’t be bothering her.

Crying had worn her out and she was able to fall into a light sleep. She could hear voices from downstairs but she blocked them out.

She hadn’t quite fallen fully asleep when her door flew open, causing her to open her eyes with a start.

“Get up.”

She lifted her head to see Justin standing in her doorway. “What?” she whispered.

“Get up and come downstairs to the kitchen. Now.”

She was about to protest but he didn’t give her a chance. He left her room, leaving her door open and she laid her head back down, listening to him go downstairs. She had never heard his voice sound like that and it was a little scary. And she had the feeling that Kate and Trace weren’t there anymore to calm Justin down. It would just be him and her.

She thought about just staying in bed but realized that would just aggravate him further and he seemed mad enough as it was. So she slowly sat up and got out of bed. She took her time going downstairs, not wanting to face him. When she did finally reach the kitchen, he was looking in the fridge.

“Sit down. There.” He pointed at the table and she timidly went over to it and sat down in a chair. She watched him cautiously as he pulled something out of the fridge. He came over to the table and she flinched slightly as he slammed a Tupperware dish of pasta onto the table in front of her.

“Eat this.”

She wasn’t hungry but she wasn’t going to argue with him at that point. She took the fork form him and slowly began to eat the pasta. He sat down across form her and she avoided his unrelenting stare. The pasta tasted like cardboard but she forced it all down, finding it very difficult to swallow the food past the lump in her throat.

As soon as she was done, Justin reached over and pushed the empty dish to the edge of the table. There was a long moment of silence and Brenna continued avoiding his eyes.

“I want to know exactly what happened with Drew,” he finally said. “There has to be a good reason.”

She shut her eyes briefly and had to ask. “What if there isn’t?”

His jaw clenched. “There has to be,” he bit out.

Her eyes closed again and she clenched her hands into balls.

“No, we’re NOT doing this anymore, Brenna.”

Her eyes opened as his finger hooked under her chin and brought it up. She found herself looking at him again.

“I deserve to know,” he said quietly. “And I want to know exactly what happened that day.”

She wet her dry lips and swallowed. “I-I was over at Drew’s helping him pack and we were talking about all the things we used to do together when we were dating and then all of a sudden he kissed me.”

“He kissed you,” Justin replied slowly. “What did you do?”

“I pulled away and left and came home.”

“So if that’s what happened then why did you say that you and Drew kissed?”

“I…”

“Because when you say you and Drew kissed that implies that you were both active participants in it. And that’s completely different from Drew kissing you and you pulling back.”

She looked away.

“Now, I completely believe what you just told me because I trust you and I know you. I know you would not hurt me like that. So I know that you’re telling me the truth. So my next question is why are you trying to make me mad at you? What could you possibly be getting out of it?”

“I’m not,” she whispered. “I wasn’t thinking about my wording when I said me and Drew kissed.”

He shook his head. “Oh, you were thinking. You’re smart, Brenna. You knew exactly what you were doing. You knew how mad I’d get if you told me you had kissed another guy. You took the blame for something that wasn’t your fault and there has to be a reason for that.”

She silently shook her head.

“Alright well I’m going to tell you what I’ve come up with for a reason for why you’re doing this and why you’re so depressed.” He leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. “You never fully dealt with your father’s death and your aunt drying brought all those memories of your dad dying back. And you remembered how someone you loved left you and how much that hurt. And you don’t know how to cope with that hurt. So you build up this wall around you. You want to protect yourself from ever feeling that pain again and the easiest way to do that is to not let people get close. You’re trying to keep me and your mom and my mom and Kate away. Because if you do that and one of us leaves, it won’t hurt as much. So you refuse to talk, refuse to call home to your mom. And when I finally demand that you talk, you throw something at me that’s sure to make me go away. You were hoping that I wouldn’t question it. That I would just break up with you. But that didn’t happen. And now you’re sitting there wondering what you’re going to do and trying to figure out another way to push me away. Because I love you and I care about you.”

There were tears streaming down Brenna’s face when Justin finished. How had he gotten so deep into her mind and read her thoughts that she hadn’t even been able to figure out?

She leaned her head down in her arms as she cried. She no longer had the energy to hold her head up.

“Am I right, Bren?” Justin asked, his voice now soft, gentle.

She sucked in a breath and nodded her head, not being able to speak. She heard the sound of a chair being pushed back and then there was a hand on her back.

“Come on. Let’s go somewhere else.”

She allowed him to pull her up. He took her hand and led her into the entertainment room. Like he had always used to do, he sat down on the couch and then pulled her down to sit sideways across his lap. She sat there silently as he brought up a hand to her face and slowly brushed away the tears on her cheeks.

“So you do know what you’re doing.”

She let out the breath she had been holding and looked at him. “Now I do,” she whispered.

He slipped his arms around her waist. “It’s really hard dealing with death, Bren, and sometimes we don’t always cope in the best way. You gotta believe me when I say that you’re dealing with it really bad.”

She sniffed. “I know.”

“People die, Bren. And people leave. But you can’t just block everyone out. Then you’re left with no one. And what kind of a life is that?” He stared at her for a minute. “Just tell me what you’re feeling, Bren.”

She felt her tears start to fall again and for the first time in two weeks, she willingly leaned into his embrace.

“I miss him so much,” she cried, burying her head into his chest. His arms tightened around her.

“I know you do, Baby,” he whispered, resting his chin on the top of his head. “I know you do.”

She didn’t know how long she cried sitting there. When her tears finally slowed, she let her eyes close and her body relax.

“It’s gotta be so hard to lose your dad, Bren,” Justin finally said. “I don’t know how anyone could deal with that on their own.” He kissed the top of her head. “But please don’t block me out. I love you so much, Bren. You can’t even understand how much I love you. And I don’t want to lose you. I can’t lose you. Please let me try and help.”

She lifted her head so she could see his face. She wet her lips and nodded. “Okay,” she said softly.

He smiled. “Good.”

She brought up a hand and wiped her cheeks. “Maybe…maybe it wouldn’t hurt to talk to that guy you were talking about. Just once or twice.”

His hand came up to rest on the side of her face. “I really think it will help, Bren. We can even go together if you want.”

She stared at him and as she did, her heart swelled with so much love for him. She had tried to push him away for two weeks and he had never stopped caring and trying to help. She couldn’t ask for anything more than him. Now that he had helped her figure out what was going on in her head she felt a million times better than she had in the past two weeks. Without him, who knows what would have happened.

Leaning her face into his hand slightly, she blinked once and then went back to staring at him. “What would I do without you, Justin?” she finally whispered.

His lips curved up. “Funny, but I wonder what I would do without you everyday,” he said before dipping his head down and capturing her lips in a long, slow kiss.