“Hey, are you okay?” Kate said, quickly coming into the room and pulling Brenna’s hair back from her face.

Brenna’s stomach seemed to calm down and she weakly reached up to flush the toilet. “I feel horrible.”

“Are you sick?”

Brenna propped her head up in her arms. “I was eating breakfast and I just all of a sudden started feeling sick.”

“Were you eating?”

“Cereal.”

“With milk?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh, you know, I bet it was the milk. Justin always leaves it on the counter all day and then sticks it back in the fridge. Did it smell funny to you?”

“I don’t remember,” Brenna moaned into her arms.

Kate stood up. “I’ll be right back.”

Brenna listened to her walk away and took a big breath, trying to will away the nausea that was still rolling in her stomach.

“Yeah, that milk definitely did NOT smell good,” Kate said, coming back into the bathroom. “I don’t know why he doesn’t get that putting it back into the fridge after it’s been out all day isn’t going to make it better.”

Brenna pulled her head up. “He does this a lot?”

“He does it enough. Actually, I think you were telling me a while back that you’ve gotten sick from it before.”

Brenna closed her eyes, feeling tears well up in them. This was so stupid that she couldn’t even remember little thing like Justin leaving the milk out and she had to get sick to her stomach to figure it out.

“Are you alright?”

Brenna opened her eyes to find Kate giving her a concerned look. She shook her head and leaned her head back against the wall. “I hate this so much,” she whispered. “I’m tired of not knowing anything.”

Kate wet a washcloth and knelt down by Brenna, putting it on her forehead. “I know, Hun. You’re going to remember everything though. You just have to give it some time.”

Brenna closed her eyes again and sighed.

“Do you want to go lay down? You look a little flushed.”

“Yeah.” Brenna accepted Kate’s stretched out hand and let her help pull her up. “Why are you here?” she asked once she was on her feet. “Were you looking for Justin?”

“No, he wants me to get all of his receipts together and organized.”

“Oh.”

“Can you get upstairs okay or do you want some help?”

“No, I’m okay.” Brenna left the bathroom and walked upstairs slowly, feeling slightly weak all over from throwing up. Once she got to her room, she got into bed and pulled the blankets over her. She laid there staring at the wall for a while before slowly letting her eyes close.

The smell of cologne and the feeling of a hand in her hair pulled her from her light sleep. She opened her eyes slowly and found Justin sitting on the edge of the bed by her.

“Are you feeling any better?” he asked softly, moving his hand from her hair to place his palm on her forehead.

She nodded. “Yeah,” she whispered.

“I’m sorry about the milk. I forgot.”

“It’s okay.”

“Do you need to go to the doctors? I can make an appointment.”

She shook her head. “No. What time is it?”

“Only ten. I just got back. Did you want to go back to sleep?”

“No.” She rolled onto her back and Justin stood up as she pushed back the blankets and got out of bed. “Is Kate still here?”

“Yeah. She’s knee deep in receipts in the office right now.” He went to the door and held it open for her. “Do you want something to eat?”

“No.” She left the room and he walked behind her as they went downstairs. When they reached the bottom, he turned to his office.

“I’m just going to see how much Kate’s gotten done,” he said.

She nodded and walked to the kitchen. She went over and picked up the cereal box that was still on the counter and put it away in the pantry. The carton of milk was now sitting in the sink and as she stood there, a whiff of the smell of it met he nose. Just smelling it was enough to bring back the memory of throwing up and it made her stomach roll again. Covering her mouth, she bolted to the bathroom, making it there just in time before she threw up. She was still heaving into the toilet when she heard Justin’s voice.

“Oh, Bren,” he murmured as he squatted down beside her and rubbed her back

She coughed and tried to catch her breath as her stomach calmed down a bit. She pulled her head back slightly and brought up a shaky hand to push back her hair.

“You need to lay down,” he said. “Come on.” He helped her stand up and she let him put his arm around her waist as he walked her to the door.

“Is she okay?” Kate asked, appearing in the hallway.

“No. She’s still sick,” Justin said. “I’m going to take her back to bed.”

“Okay.”

Brenna walked as carefully as she could upstairs, not wanting to upset her stomach any further. Justin kept a firm grip on her, keeping her steady the entire way up the stairs. In their bedroom, he went over to her dresser and pulled out a pair of pajama bottoms.

“Here, change into these. You’ll be more comfortable.”

She took them from him and then stood there silently as he didn’t move. She wasn’t just going to change in front of him.

“Oh,” he said after a moment. “Sorry.” He turned away and she quickly turned around and changed from her jeans into the pajama pants. When she moved to the bed, he came over and pulled back the blankets. She got into bed and laid down on her back. Justin pulled the blankets over her and tucked them in around her.

“Do you need anything?” he asked. “Some juice or something?”\

“No, I’m fine.”

“Okay.” He leaned down and kissed her forehead. “I’m going to go help Kate. Call if you need anything, okay?”

She nodded and closed her eyes as she listened to him leave. Once she was sure he was gone, she opened her eyes and stared up at the ceiling. Loneliness and sadness took over her emotions and she began to cry.

“Well this is de ja vu.”

Brenna spit into the toilet and lifted her head to see Kate standing in the bathroom door. She reached up and flushed the toilet and then pulled away from it.

“You’re still sick?” Kate asked. “You should go to a doctor. Maybe you have the stomach flu or food poisoning or something.”

Brenna shook her head and ran her hand through her hair.

“Does Justin know you’re still sick?”

“No. He had a morning meeting or something.” Brenna pulled herself up to her feet and went to the sink to splash some cold water on her face. “I felt fine yesterday afternoon and night.”

“Did you drink more bad milk?”

“No. I was just drinking coffee.” She dried off her face and Kate moved out of the way so she could leave the bathroom.

“Are you feeling better now?”

“A bit.” Brenna moved to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water. “Maybe I’m just stressed out or something.”

Kate was silent for a long moment and Brenna was just starting to feel uncomfortable with the quietness when Kate spoke.

“Bren, is there any possible way that you’re pregnant?”

Brenna looked up at Kate sharply. “What?”

“I’ve never seen you get sick from stress before and you throwing up this morning and yesterday just sounds a lot like morning sickness.”

Brenna was already shaking her head before Kate even finished talking. “No. There’s no possible way.”

“Are you sure?”

“Kate, we haven’t,” she felt herself blush and she lowered her voice, “had sex.”

“But…what if it was before? It’s only been two weeks since the accident. What if it was right before?”

Brenna sank down in a chair. “No,” she whispered.

“Have you been feeling weird at all?”

“I don’t know.”

Kate bit her lip. “Do you want me to run to the drug store quickly and get a pregnancy test?”

Brenna found herself nodding silently. She didn’t get up or even move as Kate left, her thoughts going a mile a minute. While Kate was gone, she came up with reasons why she couldn’t possibly be pregnant. She and Justin had only been married for a year. There was no way they would have been trying to have kids so soon. And she had seen an opened box of condoms in the medicine cabinet in their bathroom so they obviously used protection. And besides, wouldn’t she know if she was pregnant? It was true that she didn’t know how she normally felt but wouldn’t she have felt some sort of idea that something was off with her body?

Kate had only been gone for fifteen minutes but that was long enough for Brenna to become completely worried and stressed out. She was half relieved and half scared when Kate got back.

“I got two,” Kate said. “Just to be sure.”

Brenna nodded and stood up.

“Do you want to go upstairs to your bathroom?”

She nodded again and followed Kate upstairs to her and Justin’s bedroom. Kate gave her both boxes and Brenna went into the bathroom. When she had finished, she left everything on the counter and came out of the bathroom.

“How long do you have to wait?” Kate asked.

Brenna sat down on the edge of the bed. “Three minutes.” She raised her hand to her mouth and began to bite her nails.

“It wouldn’t be that bad if you were pregnant, would it?” Kate asked after a moment.

Brenna felt tears well up in her eyes. “It would be horrible.”

Kate fell silent again and Brenna pulled her hand from her mouth and placed her elbows on her knees, leaning forward to put her face in her hands.

“It’s been three minutes,” Kate finally said. “Do you want me to go check?”

Without lifting her head, Brenna nodded. She felt the weight shift on the bed as Kate stood up and went to the bathroom. Silently, she prayed for the hundredth time that the tests would be negative.

“Bren.”

She lifted her head to see Kate standing in the bathroom doorway.

“They’re both positive.”

The tears that Brenna had been holding back finally fell at Kate’s words and Brenna’s head sank back into her hands. She shook her head silently as she cried.

“Bren, it’ll be okay,” Kate said, rubbing her back.

“No it won’t,” Brenna whispered. “This is the worst thing that could happen.”

“Why?”

“How am I supposed to have a kid? I don’t remember anything. I don’t remember Justin or this house or anything. How am I supposed to have the baby of someone I don’t even know?”

“But…but it’s Justin,” Kate said helplessly.

“And I don’t remember him at all.” Brenna raised her head. “And what if I never remember him? What if my memory never comes back?”

Kate was quiet. “If your memory never comes back then you’ll just make new memories,” she finally said. “And you’ll fall in love with Justin again.”

“But what if I don’t? What if I can’t fall in love with him again?”

Kate got a concerned look on her face. “You can. You guys are meant to be together. If your memory never comes back, you guys will fall in love again and it’ll be back to normal. And now you’ll have a baby together.”

Brenna began to cry again. She had momentarily forgotten about the baby but Kate’s words brought it back to her consciousness. “I can’t be pregnant! This isn’t fair!”

Kate didn’t say anything.

“I can’t do this all alone.”

“You won’t be alone. You have Justin.”

“But I don’t remember him, Kate! I don’t even know the father of this baby!”

Kate shook her head wordlessly and put her arm around Brenna’s shoulders. “I’m so sorry, Bren.”

“He can’t know. Not yet.”

“You can’t hide it for too long, Bren. And you need to go to a doctor.”

“I just can’t tell him right now.” Brenna raised her head and wiped her cheeks. “And he’s going to be home soon,” she moaned.

“Okay, we’ll get rid of the pregnancy test and he won’t know. But he’s gonna find out eventually, Bren.”

“I know. Just not today.”

“Okay.” Kate withdrew her arm and stood up. “I’ll throw it out in the garbage in the garage so he doesn’t accidentally see it.”

Brenna nodded and watched Kate go into the bathroom and get everything and then leave the room and go downstairs. Slowly standing, Brenna went over to the French doors that led onto the balcony. She stepped outside into the bright sun and sat down on a whicker chair that was out there. Hugging her legs to her chest, she rested her head on her drawn up knees.

This couldn’t actually be happening. She was still having such a hard time trying to get used to everything. Such a hard time trying so hard to remember and not being able to. And now this. She had only been out of the hospital for a week and now she had to face something like this. And she didn’t even feel as if she had anyone she could turn to. No one understood what she was going through.

“I almost missed you out here.”

Hearing Justin’s voice behind her, Brenna hastily wiped her wet eyes, not wanting him to know she was crying.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked as he came in front of her.

“Nothing,” she lied.

“It doesn’t look like nothing is wrong,” he replied. “You’ve been crying.”

She shook her head quickly. “No, I’m fine. How was your meeting?” she asked, trying to take his attention away from her.

He leaned back against the balcony railing. “It was good. Went a little long but they always do. Are you sure you’re alright?”

She nodded. “I’m fine,” she said, having to force the words out because in reality, she was anything but fine.