Hanging up the phone, Justin leaned back in his chair and shut his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose. He had been talking to his mom for the past hour and he only felt slightly better than before. He had called her for some advice but hadn’t really received anything too helpful. He really shouldn’t have expected it. It’s not like his mother had anymore experience with amnesia than he did.

This was truly the hardest thing he had ever had to go through. Brenna was his wife and it was so hard to accept the fact that she didn’t know him. He was used to her being just the normal Brenna. He was trying to make things work by just pretending it was like they had just met and were just starting to date. But that was impossible to do. He had known her for so many years and it was so unnatural to pretend to be strangers even when that’s what she saw them as.

It had been two weeks since Brenna had come home from the hospital and he was slowly getting a more realistic picture of things. Everything was not just going to go back to normal and it was going to be a very slow process.

The past week had been pretty bad too. Brenna had been crying a lot, although she denied it when he asked. And she was keeping to herself, staying in their room for a lot of the day. He had tried to talk to her and when that hadn’t worked, he had tried to get Kate to talk to her. Kate had seemed uncomfortable with the entire situation and had said that he should be the one talking to her.

Pushing back his chair, Justin stood up, deciding he’d go see where Brenna was and see if she wanted to talk. He went upstairs to their room and went inside. The room was empty but he found light coming from the bathroom and went over to the open doorway. Brenna was standing there, facing the mirror and staring at herself as she hugged her arms around her body. Her eyes were red from crying and she was still in her pajamas even though it was almost two in the afternoon.

“Are you alright?” he asked and she jumped a bit. Her eyes moved from her reflection to his and she nodded slightly.

“Bren, are you really okay?” he asked softly. “There’s something wrong that you’re not telling me.”

She went back to staring at herself in the mirror and he came fully into the bathroom. Putting his hands on her arms, he gently turned her around to face him. He watched in dismay as some tears fell from her eyes.

“Please, Bren,” he pleaded. “What’s wrong? If you tell me maybe I can help. Please.”

She shut her eyes tightly and he wet his lips, praying she would say something. Anything.

Her eyes finally opened and she spoke. “I-I…” Her voice broke and she tried again. “I’m…” she trailed off and shook her head as more tears fell.

“What, Bren?” he whispered.

She sucked in a deep breath. “I think I’m pregnant.”

It was as if everything else disappeared and all he was aware that Brenna had just said she was pregnant. After waiting for so long to hear those words, they were finally there.

He couldn’t help himself as he stepped forward and pulled her into a tight hug. “Oh my gosh, Bren,” he mumbled into her neck. “This is so amazing.”

She pushed her hands against his chest until he let go of her. “What?” she whispered, tears falling from her eyes.

He reached out and brushed her hair from her face. “We’ve been trying to get pregnant for like three months,” he said, trying to gauge her mood.

She rubbed her fingers over her eyes and sat down on the closed toilet seat. “Oh.”

“How long have you known?”

She ran a shaky hand through her hair. “A week.”

His eyebrows drew together. “A week?!” he exclaimed. “You’ve known for a week and you never told me?”

She slowly nodded.

“I can’t believe this, Brenna! What if something’s wrong? You should have gone to a doctor the day you found out! And what about me? Don’t I have a right to know? I mean, I know you don’t remember anything, Brenna, but don’t you think I still had a right to know last week?”

She bit her lip and wiped her cheeks. “I-I didn’t know what to say. Kate said as long as I didn’t wait too long it would be okay.”

“Wait, Kate knew?! Kate knew and not me? What the HELL, Brenna.”

She started to respond but he was too worked up to listen. Instead he turned around and left the bathroom and their room. As he went downstairs, he pulled out his cell phone and dialed up Kate’s number.

“Hey,” she answered after the second ring.

“You knew Brenna was pregnant and you told her it was fine not to tell me?!”

There was a long pause. “Um…she told you?”

“Obviously, Kate. After a damn WEEK. Why the hell would you tell her not to tell me? This is MY baby!”

“I never told her not to tell you, Justin. Just shut up and calm down for a second.”

He squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep breath.

“I never told her not to tell you,” Kate repeated. “What I told her was that if she couldn’t tell you right away it wouldn’t be the end of the world as long as she didn’t wait too long. What else was I supposed to say, Justin? I was just trying to do what I thought was best.”

He didn’t say anything.”

“Justin, I really hope you didn’t get mad at her. Put yourself in her shoes for a minute. She’s scared and confused. She doesn’t need anyone upset at her right now.”

He found himself nodded. “Okay. I’m gonna go talk to her.”

“Good. And Justin?”

“Yeah.”

“Congratulations.”

He found himself starting to smile. “Thanks, Kate.” He hung up the phone and then went back upstairs, already feeling guilty that he had yelled at Brenna. He really hoped he hadn’t screwed anything up by doing that.

She was still sitting on the toilet when he reached the door of the bathroom but now she was hunched forward, her face in her hands. He slowly went into the bathroom and over to her, squatting down in front of her.

“Hey,” he said softly, gently pulling her hands from her face. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled.”

She looked up at him but didn’t say anything.

“I’m not mad, Bren. I’m sorry.” He watched her for a minute. “I know this is really hard for you and I know you’re scared. But it’s all going to be okay. This is going to be a good thing.”

She slowly nodded. “Okay.”

He smiled. “Okay.” Now that he had gotten over the thought of her not telling him about it, the happiness was back. They were going to have a baby.

Moving onto his knees, he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against him. She didn’t fight it but didn’t return the hug either.

“Since we’re going to that therapist on Thursday, why don’t we make an appointment with an OB doctor too? I actually think they’re in the same building.”

She nodded again and he pressed his lips to the top of her head before pulling back.

“I love you, Bren,” he whispered. “And this is gonna be so awesome. You’ll see.” His smile grew a bit more. “You’ll see.”

“So this Dr. Waters guy seems really nice from the few minutes we talked on the phone,” Justin said as he pulled into the parking lot of the building where he and Brenna had two appointments that day. “He should be good.”

Brenna nodded silently as she undid her seatbelt and reached down to the floor in between their seats to grab her purse.

Justin sighed quietly as he turned off the car. She had been quiet all morning. He was hoping she’d open up during their therapy session.

Undoing his own seatbelt, Justin got out of the car and went over to Brenna’s side. Almost immediately, there was the flash of a camera. He jerked his head up to see three paparazzi standing a few feet away. Cursing, he went to Brenna’s side. She was tense. She had hardly even left eh house since the accident and she hadn’t encountered the paparazzi yet.

“Just ignore them,” he said quietly as he slipped an arm around her waist and began to walk towards the building. Brenna didn’t say anything but he could feel her body get even tenser. When one of the paparazzi stepped directly in front of them and a flash went off in their faces, she jumped and gripped his shirt with one of her hands.

“Justin,” she whispered, her voice trembling.

He tightened his grip on her and pulled her closer as he pushed past the paparazzi and went into the building. Once out of eyesight of them, he stopped his brisk pace and looked down at Brenna.

“Are you alright?” he asked, concerned for her.

She let go of his shirt and dropped her arms to her side. “Yeah,” she said softly.

“I should have warned you that there might be paparazzi here,” he said. “Sorry if they scared you.”

“Is it…is it always like that?”

“Unfortunately, yeah it is. Sometimes it’s only one guy. Sometimes ten. You just have to learn how to pretend they’re not there. Never give them a good picture.”

Brenna nodded slowly and straightened her shirt, smoothing her hands down the front. She didn’t say much as they went upstairs to the doctor’s office. They were immediately ushered into Peter Water’s empty office and then the receptionist left them there. Justin sat down in one of the armchairs in front of the desk and Brenna sat in the other. They waited in silence for a few minutes before the door opened and an older man came into the room with a file in his hand.

“Hi, Justin, Brenna. I’m Peter Waters,” he introduced himself. “Please call me Peter.”

Justin rose from his chair slightly to shake the man’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“I’m sorry we couldn’t get you two in sooner for our first meeting. After this we should be meeting at least once every few weeks. Perhaps even more depending on how you’re progressing, Brenna.”

She nodded. “Okay.”

Peter sat down behind his desk and spread the file out in front of him. He looked at it for a moment before looking back at them. “So the real purpose for these therapy sessions is to help both of you adjust and deal with your amnesia, Brenna. I’m sure it’s difficult for you to discuss your feelings and thoughts to each other all the time and this should help. What I need from both of you is for you to be as open as you can and to say what’s on your mind.”

Justin nodded, as did Brenna, and Peter leaned back in his chair.

“Alright. So you’ve been at home for about three weeks now, Brenna?”

She nodded. “Yes.”

“And what sort of things do you do at home? Or have you gone back to your previous job?”

“No. I, um, I just stay at home I guess,” she said. “I’ve been looking at pictures and videos trying to remember something.”

“Have you remembered anything yet?”

“No.”

Peter wrote something down in the file and then looked at Justin. “And what are you doing, Justin? Have you gone back to working?”

“A bit. I’m trying to be at home as much as possible though. Next week I have to go to Hawaii for a week and Brenna was going to come with me to do that.”

Peter nodded. “That should be nice. I hear it’s beautiful out there this time of year.”

“It is,” Justin said. “Hopefully I’ll have enough time to enjoy it in between working.”

“Are you looking forward to going, Brenna?”

“Yeah, I guess. It’ll be nice to have a change in scenery.”

“I imagine it would be.” Peter focused his eyes on Brenna. “How have you been adjusting since coming home from the hospital, Brenna?”

Brenna was quiet for a moment and Justin looked over at her. “It’s been hard,” she finally said quietly.

“What’s made it difficult?”

“I just…I just don’t remember anything.”

“What’s been the hardest part?”

Brenna was silent and Justin immediately knew what she was thinking about. She looked over at him and then down at his hands.

“Brenna?” Peter prompted.

“We found out she’s pregnant,” Justin finally said after a period of silence.

Peter’s eyebrows rose. “I see.”

“I think it happened right before the accident,” Justin said. “So…yeah.”

“Well I guess this puts a new spin on things. When did you find out?”

“I found out a couple days ago. Brenna’s known for about a week.”

“What are you feelings about being pregnant, Brenna?”

She looked out the window and Justin watched her swallow. She looked like she was about to cry. “I just really don’t want to have a baby,” she whispered.

“Was this an unplanned pregnancy?”

“No,” Justin answered. “Before the accident we had been trying for Brenna to get pregnant for at least a few months.”

“But why?” Brenna asked, looking over at him. “We haven’t even been married for a year.”

“But we both wanted kids and the timing was right.” He sighed when she looked away and he reached up his hand to rub his temple.

“How do you feel about Brenna being pregnant, Justin?”

He looked up at Peter. “I was excited. I mean, I still am but she doesn’t even want it. And before it was something we both wanted and we both were excited about. And now it’s just me who feels like that.”

“Well how am I supposed to feel?” Brenna asked, wiping away a tear that had fallen. “I don’t remember any of this and I don’t remember you. How am I supposed to be happy about this?”

He shook his head tiredly. “I don’t know.” There was a small silence and then he spoke again. “It just sucks that the thing that we-that I-wanted most happened and to you it’s the worst possible thing that could ever have happened.”

She didn’t say anything.

Peter crossed one leg over the other. “I think the important thing for both of you to understand is that a lot has changed over the past few weeks. Justin, you need to realize that things can’t and won’t be the same as they were before the accident. And, Brenna, you need to understand that you did have a life with Justin and this baby is a result of that life. You can’t go back to how it was nor can you ignore how it was. There needs to be a careful balance established between living with your past and living with everything new that is happening.”

“How do we do that?” Justin found himself asking.

“The key is communication between the two of you. What I’d like for you to do is sit down together once a day for at least thirty minutes and talk with no distractions. It can be about anything you’d like. It’s the talking and creating familiarity amongst you that is the key.”

Justin nodded. That didn’t sound too hard to do.

“And I’d like you both to keep a journal of anything that you’d like to talk about and about your feeling on things. Does that sound reasonable?”

He nodded again and Brenna did the same.

“And, Brenna, if you remember anything at all, write it down. I’m sure your other doctors have told you before but it’s important.”

“Okay,” she said quietly.

Their session ended soon after that and after setting up another appointment two weeks later, Justin and Brenna left the office. Justin could tell that Brenna was still a little upset from all the talk about her pregnancy and he turned to her when they reached the elevator.

“Did you want to reschedule the other appointment?” he asked. “We don’t have to do it today if you don’t feel like it.”

She was silent for a minute before speaking. “No. I’d rather do it today. Make sure everything’s okay.”

He smiled a bit. “Good. Do you want to maybe grab some lunch or something after the appointment? It should be over by noon.”

She nodded. “Okay.”

The elevator doors opened and he stepped in behind her. He pushed the button for the floor where the OB doctor’s office was located and then leaned back against the wall. While the appointment with Peter Water’s had been draining, he knew the appointment with the OB doctor would be exciting and he was glad to have something to look forward to.