Chapter Twenty-Four
"And the nominees for Male Pop Artist are..." Britney's voice trailed off as she and her co-presenter read off the names of the nominees. Justin, who probably should have been paying attention to the award being given rather than the auburn-haired girl sitting a good five seats away from him, jumped as he received a rather forceful smack on the arm.
"Ow!" he hissed, glancing at the perpetrator. "What was that for?"
"Dude, just stop," Trace whispered back.
"Stop what?" Justin asked innocently, rubbing the spot Trace had hit. It really did kind of hurt.
"Stop staring at her!"
"Who?"
"You know who. Stop it. It's starting to get really obvious." Truth be told it had been obvious the whole night. Ever since they'd sat down, Justin had been stealing glances at Rachael in what he thought was an inconspicuous manner and she had been doing the same with him. Everyone in the row saw it, though Britney and Lance seemed to be doing their best to turn a blind eye, and it was making for a very uncomfortable evening for all involved. The two offenders had barely spoken to each other, aside from the rather brief and cold greetings they'd exchanged at the beginning of the night, and had purposely placed themselves at opposite ends of the row. Aside from that and a brief encounter outside of the bathroom where Rachael had rather snappishly told him she hoped he was proud of himself and Justin, who really wasn't sure what he was supposed to be proud of, had responded with a snotty wish that she had a "smashing" time with Lance, they hadn't talked at all.
By all accounts it seemed that each was annoyed with the other's choice of a date and they weren't doing a very good job of hiding it. Rachael had spent the past hour or so muttering things to Hollie, who was sitting next to her, about what a bastard Justin was being and how she wasn't jealous and she didn't care who he went out with so he really should stop trying to make her care because she didn't care and she was never going to care and oh, did Hollie actually want to hear Christina Aguilera singing? She was very sorry and she'd shut up now. In stark contrast, Justin had been pretty silent, but as Trace was so kindly pointing out, was finding it very difficult to keep his eyes off of Rachael. The pair of them were being very immature about the situation and even Trace, who was normally all in favor of immature behavior, was getting sick of it. For two people who had never been anything more than good friends, they certainly did a good impression of jealous exes.
"And the Grammy goes to...Justin Timberlake!" Britney exclaimed, her voice reflecting how proud she was. The audience applauded but it took Justin, who was still arguing to Trace that he had not been staring at Rachael, about thirty seconds to realize what was going on. When he did, a shocked smile spread over his face and Trace had to push him out of his chair to make him get up. Rachael decided to take a break from being pissed off at her best friend to be happy for him, although it was more because she couldn't help it rather than because she had any deep desire to do the right thing.
"Oh, wow, this is really unexpected!" Justin exclaimed once he'd reached the front. He was grinning ear to ear and Rachael couldn't help but smile. He looked so excited, the big dork. "Well, first and foremost I have to thank God for all of the blessings in my life. And thanks to my mom and dad for being so great and always supporting me. To the other four guys in N Sync, thanks for not killing me when I said I wanted to do a solo record. Thanks to everyone who worked on this record and all of the fans. And of course, thanks to my Rachael for always being there. Goodnight." He smiled and waved as he walked off but was inwardly cursing himself. Had he really just said that? Had he just said "my Rachael" to God knows how many people? He hadn't even thought about it before it came out, it had just come. He avoided looking at Britney as they headed backstage and hoped she hadn't taken that phrase the wrong way.
"Oh god," Rachael muttered the moment he'd said it, covering her face and slumping down in her chair in a manner that did not exactly fit her elegant attire. "He's a bastard. He's such a bastard."
"Keep saying it, Rach," Hollie whispered in her ear. "Maybe one of these days you'll actually believe it." She was getting pretty irritated with Rachael's constant mutterings about Justin. If she wanted to be in denial, that was just fine, but did she have to be so vocal about it? Hollie was also beginning to feel sorry for Lance who was having to endure an entire evening of his date working overtime, and obviously failing miserable, to convince herself and the world that she wasn't in love with another guy. He seemed to either be taking it pretty well, though. Either that or he was just completely oblivious to what was going on right under his nose.
***
"So where do you want to go first?" Lance asked Rachael as she adjusted the hem of her top. The two had stopped by the hotel to change into some more party-worthy clothes and were now sitting in a car trying to make a decision about where the driver should take them. While they'd ridden in with Hollie, Gaby, JC and Trace, the three couples had agreed to take separate cars afterwards so they could make their own decisions about which after parties to attend and how long to attend them. Rachael shrugged, feeling pretty noncommital about the whole thing.
"I don't really care, Lancey. We can go wherever you want to go." She'd pulled her hair out of its fancy updo and was twirling a strand around her finger absentmindedly as she spoke. It had actually been a pretty bad decision, since her hair had about a hundred pounds of hairspray in it, but it had been irritating her so she'd taken it down. After much wrestling with her brush and some water, she'd finally managed to make it look semi-decent.
"Well, why don't we call JC or Gaby or someone and see where they're at and we can just go there?" Lance suggested and Rachael nodded.
"Sounds good." She gazed out the window as Lance made the call and told the driver where to go. It was true that she didn't care where they went, although some eerie voice in the back of her head kept saying she just wanted to go wherever Justin was. Okay, so that was partially true, but only because she wanted to see what happened with him and Britney. It was her job as a best friend to be around when Justin made stupid decisions as she was pretty sure he would do that night.
"So are you having a good time?" Lance's voice interrupted her thoughts and Rachael looked over at him. She smiled, but he couldn't really see it in the dark car.
"Yeah," she lied. Actually she'd been having a terrible time, but that wasn't his fault. She wasn't really sure whose fault it was or why she had been in such a bad mood during the entire ceremony. Well obviously it was probably Justin's fault. Everything was.
"Are you sure?" Lance grimaced. "Because you've been seeming kind of grumpy and I was afraid I did something to piss you off..."
"Oh, god no, Lancey!" Rachael exclaimed immediately. She felt terrible that he was actually blaming himself for her surliness. Come to think of it, she'd been pretty terrible to him all night. She was just a bad date in general; she was beginning to wonder why guys were even interested in her anymore. Clearly they all had some sort of mental problem where they didn't realize she wasn't desirable in any way. "No, no, I'm having a great time. Really."
"Okay. Good. Me too." That was a lie if he'd ever told one. As much as he was trying to ignore it, it hadn't escaped Lance's notice that the woman next to him had spent almost the entire ceremony whispering things to Hollie and shooting looks at Justin. He had been spending the whole evening trying to tell himself that he was just imagining things, but he was pretty sure he wasn't. And he'd felt a pang in his chest when Justin had thanked "his" Rachael during his speech. Rachael insisted he had only meant it in that "my best friend Rachael" kind of way, but it had also not escaped Lance's notice that Justin had been throwing glances at Rachael about twice as much as she had been doing to him. Lance was strongly regretting getting in the middle of all this.
***
"Wow, yeah! That would be amazing!" Britney exclaimed wholeheartedly. "Wouldn't that be amazing, Justin?"
"Hmm? Yeah, amazing," Justin agreed with a nod. As was typical of that night, he had no clue what he'd just agreed would be amazing as he and Britney sat talking to Pharrell at one of the many Grammy after parties. He was busy searching the crowd for Rachael and Lance so he could keep an eye on them and make sure Lance didn't try anything dodgy. He hadn't seen them at all in the hour since the ceremony had ended, but JC had told him about twenty minutes ago that he'd just received a phone call from Lance and they should be there any minute. Justin's imagination was going wild worrying about all the terrible things they could be doing in their absence. Lance was probably trying to seduce her, the evil swine. Never mind that "Lance" and "seduce" were pretty much oxymorons. That was not the point.
"Justin, I'll be right back, okay?" Britney's voice forced its way into his mind. Looking up at her, he realized that Pharrell had already left and it was just the two of them left sitting at their table. Well, actually it was just the one of him, as Britney was now standing and looking at him quizzically.
"Oh. Yeah, sure." He nodded and smiled as she walked away. Twirling the straw in his drink, Justin surveyed the scene in front of him. Trace and Gaby were talking and laughing as they danced in the middle of the floor, JC and Hollie were standing on the other side of the room talking to the guy who'd one producer of the year whose name Justin couldn't currently recall, and Chris was gesturing frantically as he talked to a couple of models nearby. They all looked like they were having a really good time and Justin wished he could say the same. He'd been miserable all night. His plan to take Britney with him and, although he wouldn't admit to anyone this had been his purpose, make Rachael jealous had turned out to be a really bad one. Rachael had obviously been upset with him and even though he was still feeling kind of bitter about her kissing him and then basically telling him it meant nothing to her, he still felt bad about upsetting her. It was an entirely frustrating feeling, knowing that no matter what she did he could never stay angry at her for very long. And when he said that out loud in his mind it made him realize what a loser he was, which did not lift his spirits.
Ten or fifteen minutes went by before he noticed that Britney hadn't returned. And when another ten or fifteen passed he probably would have gotten up to go look for her, but that's when his eyes fell on the person he'd been combing the crowd for all night. Sitting on the other side of the room dressed in black dress pants, black stillettos and a black corset top with red accents, looking completely and utterly bored and sipping what appeared to be a glass of Coke was Rachael Jacques. Justin had no idea why Lance wasn't with her, but he didn't much care. He needed to go make peace with his friend so he could actually enjoy the rest of the night. He finished off his drink and stood up, forcing his way through the crowd and making his way over to her.
"Hey," he greeted her as he approached. She looked up and an unreadable expression crossed her face. If Justin could read her mind, he would have known that Rachael was noticing he hadn't changed out of his suit but rather just lost the jacket, rolled up the sleeves, untucked the shirt and loosened the tie and silently cursing herself for thinking how good he looked, thinking he was purposely trying to drive her crazy.
"Hello," she replied, seeming less than friendly and obviously not about to drop her snippy demeanor. Justin rolled his eyes.
"Would you stop acting like that?" he demanded.
"Acting like what?" she snapped defensively.
"Like a jealous girlfriend!" Okay, so he'd come over here to make peace but he wasn't doing a very good job of it. It was her fault for being so difficult all the time.
"Oh, you'd love that, wouldn't you?" Rachael hissed. "Mr. I'll-Bring-My-Ex-Girlfriend-to-Try-and-Make-Rachael-Jealous! Well, guess what, I'm not jealous, okay? I'm not! I just don't like you very much. And I'm not your girlfriend."
"I never said you were."
"Just covering my bases."
"Whatever," he spat and turned to walk away. He'd only taken maybe three steps before he turned and walked back. He was so weak when it came to her. "Okay, look." He sighed and dug his hands into his pockets as he slid into the seat next to her and she glared back at him. He really needed to fix this immediately. "I know you and I have been having some weird times since last week and you're obviously pissed at me for something, but can we just stop?" he pleaded. "I really hate arguing with you and I won't be able to have a good life until we just act like normal people again." Rachael eyed him skeptically for a second before she responded.
"I hate to tell you this, Justin, but I don't think you'll ever be normal." She looked away from him and took a sip of her Coke, her expression never changing.
"So that's a 'yes,' then?" he asked hopefully. It was a typical Rachael "yes." The type where she never actually agreed to what he'd asked, but made fun of him instead.
"I didn't say that. And while we're on the subject of you not being normal, you won't be able to have a good life until we fix things? Drama queen much?" She smirked and Justin's face broke into a grin. That was a definite "yes."
"Would it kill you to change it to 'drama king'? I mean, seriously...would it?" Justin pouted at being called a queen and Rachael laughed, pinching his cheeks annoyingly.
"Yes it would kill me. And yes we can kiss and make up. Except for the whole kissing part," she added quickly, her cheeks turning red as she realized what she'd said. She focused her attention into her drink and Justin laughed lightly, directing his gaze out to the dance floor. They were both silent for about a minute as they tried to decide what to say now that they weren't being mad at each other.
"So you having fun with Lance?" Justin asked politely. He didn't really want to know the answer, but he figured it was a good way to start a conversation. Rachael shrugged.
"Yeah, sure." It wasn't entirely convincing, but Justin tried not to get his hopes up over it. First off, it was wrong for him to be happy over her having a bad time if she was and second, even if she was having a bad time with Lance, it didn't mean she'd automatically change her mind and be his. In fact, he was beginning to come to terms with the fact that she was never going to change her mind and be his. She'd always just be his friend Rachael. Nothing more, nothing less.
"You having fun with Britney?" Rachael returned the courtesy.
"Not really," her friend replied honestly. He laughed nervously and reached down to adjust his pant leg. Rachael just smiled to disguise the fact that she was feeling annoyed with the way her stomach had just lurched in response to that. There was another silence as both parties wondered where their respective dates had gone off to. Not that either was complaining. And more at the front of their minds was the fact that they both felt like they were sitting next to a newly developed crush rather than their lifelong best friend.
"So, um...Rach," Justin broke the silence again. "You wanna dance?"
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