Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. I am a complete idiot. Why on Earth would I kiss Alyssa, knowing full well she’s engaged to Ryan and was just looking for a sense of comfort? I should’ve stopped it but instead I let my dick do the talking and now she’s avoiding me like the plague.
Therefore, I’ve been spending all of my time hanging out with Cadence taking her to different places around the Twin Cities while Alyssa’s been out doing her own thing. I can’t say I blame her for avoiding me but at the same time I just want to talk to her and clear this all up. Why is it that when my life is finally getting back on track, I somehow find another way to screw it up?
The loud buzzing on the table jolts me from my thoughts and I reach over to answer it.
“Hello?”
“Hey honey, how are you doing?” My mother asks cheerily into the phone.
“I’ve been better…” I respond solemnly while walking out to the patio of the hotel. I just laid Cadence down for a nap a little bit ago and don’t want to wake her.
“What’s wrong? Did anything happen to Cadence?” She starts to spout off before I interrupt her tirade.
“She’s fine…she’s actually sleeping right now.” I say while looking out at the traffic below.
“Well than what’s going on? How’s…Alyssa?” She asks cautiously.
I can feel my breath get caught in my throat and I take a second to re-center myself. Ever since that kiss, I’ve been completely on edge with anything concerning Alyssa. She has the ability to make my brain freeze and leave me stumbling around like an idiot.
“She isn’t really speaking to me right now…” I murmur hoping my Mom would just drop it, but knowing full well she wouldn’t.
“What’d you do?” She immediately accuses.
“Why do you think it’s my fault?” I ask defensively.
“Because I’m your mother and whenever a woman isn’t speaking to man…more than likely it’s his fault.” She says lightheartedly.
I can feel a small laugh creep into my throat. “Thanks mom…”
“Anytime sweetie…now, what really happened?” She asks in that motherly tone.
I take a deep breath and prepare to unleash everything on my mom. Starting with my growing feelings towards Alyssa, my strong dislike for Ryan and of course ending with the kiss we shared. I feel bad…she has no idea what she’s in for but I guess that’s what happens when you’re a parent. You’ll do anything for your children and listening to their problems is definitely included.
“So you two kissed?” My mom reiterates after I just got done explaining everything.
“Yeah we did…”
“Well it’s about damn time!” She exclaims.
I can feel my mouth fall open at her giddiness. “What are you talking about?” I ask confused.
“Justin…ever since Alyssa came out to California with Cadence; I’ve known there was something between you two the entire time. I’m just surprised it’s taken this long for you both to realize it. Now don’t get me wrong, I think it’s entirely wrong for you both to be fooling around behind Ryan’s back, however, I absolutely adore Alyssa and I hope you both can figure this all out before the wedding. Just give her some time Justin…she’s going through a difficult time, she’ll come around.”
I smile knowing my mother was the only person who could possible shed any kind of light in my direction. “Thanks Mom…”
“That’s what I’m here for; now give my granddaughter a big kiss. I’ll see you soon honey. I love you!”
“Love you too Mom…” I say before shutting my phone and dropping it into my pocket. I take a second to enjoy the view from my hotel balcony. Tomorrow morning, I’ll be back on the bus heading to Detroit with Cadence while Alyssa will be flying back to North Carolina. I really need to talk to Alyssa as soon as possible.
________________________________________________________________________
I can feel my heart practically beating out of my chest in anticipation. I’ve spent most of the afternoon running through the different scenarios that could happen when I confront Alyssa. I am down to my last day, last possible option for talking to her before she flies back to North Carolina for God knows how long. I need to explain everything to her, lay it all out there and hopefully she won’t laugh in my face. I’ve been pacing the hallway basically every five minutes, waiting for Alyssa to get back from wherever she disappeared too. I’m not giving her any other way out, we’re going to have this out…and it’s going to be tonight.
Deciding to check her room out once more, I start heading down the hallway. I smooth my shirt over my jeans before reaching my hand up and knocking softly on the door. Finally, I can hear shuffling on the other side before the door creaks open and standing before me is a completely soaked Alyssa.
“What happened?” I ask after giving her the once over.
“I was outside when it decided to downpour. I didn’t have anything with me, so I basically ran back to the hotel. What’d you need?” She asks before positioning her foot in front of the door, blocking my entrance.
“Umm…well…I…” I stutter and notice the annoyed look on Alyssa’s face. Seeing her expression lit something in me and I was determined to get her to listen. “We need to talk and I’m not letting you leave until we do.” I say defiantly.
“I don’t have time Justin…I’m soaking wet. I need a shower and I still have to pack.” She argues.
“I don’t care…I have all night to wait for you to finish those things. Mike is watching Cadence for us and I think we need to talk before you leave tomorrow.”
Alyssa rolls her head before throwing the door open and walking away. “I’m getting in the shower…I guess sit down…” She says while grabbing her clothes and walking into the bathroom.
I nervously start to fidget with the hem of my shirt before dropping my hands in exasperation. This was Alyssa we’re talking about here…it’s not like she’s going to punch me in the face or anything…at least I hope not. Knowing I should probably find something to occupy my time while Alyssa was showering, I throw my body down onto her bed and turn the TV on.
A couple minutes later, I’m completely engrossed Sports Center when the door to the bathroom finally opens. Out walks Alyssa clad in a pair of jeans and a tank top. Her hair is went and hangs limply around her face. She doesn’t even bother to look up at me before she starts rummaging around the room. Completely ignoring my presence, she starts to load her clothes into her suitcase. I can feel the anger rising in the pit of my stomach as I watch her fold and neatly store, shirt after shirt.
“Are you even going to acknowledge me?” I say flatly.
I can tell she rolled her eyes before she even answered. “I told you I had to pack…it is your choice to wait around.”
I can feel my patience start to give and I forcefully turn the TV off before spinning around to face Alyssa. “Listen…I’m sorry about the kiss…well I’m not sorry that we kissed because it was…amazing, yeah amazing. I’m just sorry that I hurt you and put you in a really uncomfortable position.”
Alyssa looks up at me with her big blue eyes but doesn’t bother to say anything before retuning to her clothes.
“Are you going to say anything?” I demand.
She throws the shirt down into the suit case before standing up and putting her hands on her hips. Oh man, here we go.
“What do you want me to say?” She yells.
“Something…anything…you’ve been ignoring me all week and…”
“Did you ever stop to think why I was ignoring you?” She interrupts but instead of yelling, her voice has softened.
I exasperatedly throw my hands into the air at that. “Hello…that’s all I have been doing is thinking.”
“Clearly, you don’t get it or you wouldn’t be in here yelling at me.” She says before picking her things back up.
I walk over to her and rip the shirt out of her hand. Her eyes snap up to meet mine and she looks nervous. “Then clue me in as to what is going on…all week I’ve wanted to talk to you but you’re out of your room before Cadence and I come over and you’re never back before Cadence is sleeping. All I want to do is talk to you…” I insist.
I can feel Alyssa’s wall’s breaking down and she turns to sit down on the bed. Knowing she’s giving in, I try and take a deep breath to calm my temper.
“Justin, that kiss shouldn’t have happened…what I did not only hurt’s you, it hurts me and it hurts Ryan. I did the one thing I swore I never would do and that’s cheat on someone. But what scares me even more about what happened…is not the fact that I so easily gave into temptation but it meant something to me. I felt it…here.” She says pointing to her chest.
I can feel the nerves piling up in the pit of my stomach. Knowing I need to sit down, I slide onto the bed next to Alyssa. “Then why didn’t you talk to me? Why push me away all week?”
I see a single tear slide down her cheek and I gently reach up to brush it away. “Because I didn’t and still don’t know how to deal with it. I thought if I saw you, you’d look at me and see this horrible person.”
“The word horrible never comes to mind when I think of you Alyssa.” I state.
She looks up at me and a small smile plays at her lips. “I’m sorry about the kiss Justin…I really am.”
I can feel a slight twinge of disappoint in my stomach before I respond. “Don’t be…it happened and I’ll never bring it up again. But there is one thing I want you to know…” I say before taking her hand into mine and placing it on my chest. “I felt it here too.”
Alyssa looks up at me with surprise shining in her eyes. We just sit there looking into each other’s eyes and I can feel the sexual tension rising in the room; it’s practically choking me. My entire being is screaming to just take her into my arms and show her how I feel. I can feel my hands begin to shake and I have to break this stare or I’m really going to screw this up.
“Alyssa…”
“Don’t Justin…” She responds before crashing her lips again mine.
My eyes practically bulge out of my head, isn’t this the same way we ended up into this fight? Alyssa’s tongue is running across the bottom of my lips, begging for entrance and for some strange reason I pull away from her.
Both of us are breathing heavy and a blush is creeping into her cheeks. “Alyssa…we can’t. I refuse to fight with you for another week. It was torture not talking to you and as much as I want too…I can’t.”
“Just for tonight Justin…I leave tomorrow morning and for one night, I just want to follow my heart…” She says softly.
My head is practically spinning at her confession and I’m so utterly confused but I know exactly where my heart lies. If for tonight I can be with her well then I’m going to do just that.
I lift my hands up to her face cupping her cheeks and pull her lips to mine. Gently, our lips start to move together. My heart feels like it’s going to burst out of my chest the minute the kiss deepens. Ever since the other night, I’ve wondered what it’d be like to kiss her again, whether it was just a fluke or if my heart was really head over heels for her. I run my hands through her hair before letting them fall to her waist. I wrap them protectively around her side and pull her onto my lap. Our lips break for just a moment when she reaches for my shirt.
I raise my hands to let her follow through with her actions. Quickly, she takes my shirt off and drops it to the ground. Her hands travel slowly across my chest before wrapping around my torso and pulling me closer. I let me hands travel to her back before letting them lift her shit up and over her head.
My dick is practically bursting out my pants when she reaches to slip my jeans off. Smoothly, she lies back on the bed and sheds herself of all her clothing. I gently lay myself down on top of her before proceeding to kiss every inch of her neck and start making my way down her body. Alyssa lets out a few moans and I’m ready to devour her the minute my name slips from her lips.
Making my way slowly back up her body, I stop to look at her before continuing.
“Are you sure?” I ask, knowing I am more than ready for this.
“Yeah…I’m sure Justin.” She says softly.
Gradually, I lower myself onto her before pushing myself inside of her. She lets out a moan and my breath catches in my throat as soon as I enter her. After letting her get accommodated, I start to pulse in and out. I lean down and reclaim her lips once again while her hands travel up my back, every so often pulling me closer. I can feel her hips start to buck up into me with each thrust and my pace is quickening. She feels so damn good and I’ve waited so long to be with her again.
“Justin…” She yells out. “I’m so close…”
I wasn’t expecting that and begin to thrust harder and harder. Feeling myself start to slide into oblivion, Alyssa moans out and her body arches into mine. I can feel her walls tighten around me as she orgasms and it’s enough to bring me the rest of the way over the edge. After letting go, I gently slide out of her and lie next to her on the bed, pulling her close to me.
“Alyssa…”
“Don’t say anything Justin. That was beautiful. Just hold me.” She replies softly.
I am happy to accommodate her request and wrap my arms around her waist. I pull her body flush against me before wrapping the covers over us. I can feel my eyes start to get heavy and having Alyssa in my arms, is everything I’ve ever wanted.
“Goodnight…” I whisper.
“Goodnight Justin…”
_______________________________________________________________________
Have I ever told you how much I hate the sun after a perfectly wonderful night’s sleep? I don’t think I’ve ever slept so well in such a long time. Immediately, my thoughts drift back to last night and I smile. Quickly, I roll over expecting to have Alyssa lying next to me but instead the bed is empty. I feel the covers and they’re already cool. Frantically, I get up and run to the bathroom assuming she’s in the shower but it’s empty. However, there’s an envelope taped to the counter with my name on it.
Reluctantly, I tear open the envelope and scan it quick, recognizing Alyssa’s handwriting. Immediately my stomach drops.
Justin,
I am so sorry. I want you to know that last night meant everything to me. I hope you believe me, but I need to go back to North Carolina. I need to figure out where my relationship with Ryan stands. I can’t do that to him. I need to go back to my life…I am really sorry. You mean the world to me and please take care of Cadence this week. I dropped her stuff off with Mike this morning before I left. Please forgive me.
I love you,
Alyssa
-This explains exactly how I feel…
Gently, I turn the letter over and there are lyrics scribbled across the back.
Sitting here all by myself with my heart up
On the shelf
This house don’t feel like home to me
I watch the clock up on the wall, time stands
Still that’s all
When you’re out of reach I wish you could see
Since you went away, I’ve been feeling this way
What I really want to stay
I wanna see you, I wanna be with you, I wanna feel you
And put my arms around you when I hold you
I won’t let go of you baby
If I could kiss you I’d make love to you ‘cause
I need you
Like I never needed anybody, oh baby can’t you see
You’re the man that brings the woman out of me
I took a walk out in the rain, knowing that
You feel the same
With each goodbye I’m closer to you
Though the miles pull us apart, We both knew
It from the start
Together we can make it through
Every minute that you’re gone is a minute too long
Right here’s where you belong
I wanna see you, I wanna be with you, I wanna feel you
And put my arms around you when I hold you
I won’t let go of you baby
If I could kiss you I’d make love to you ‘cause
I need you
Like I never needed anybody, oh baby can’t
You see
You’re the man that brings the woman out of me
And when we are together it’s like nothing
That I’ve ever felt before
When you lay your hands on me
It‘s lightning and it’s thunder, this sweet spell that I’m under
Baby, you’re all that I need
How could she just leave me like that?
Author's Chapter Notes:
Hello Everyone!!! Thank you again for all the reviews!! You're awesome and I love to hear from everyone!! Who watched the HBO special? Was he not gorgeous?! haha! Anyways, hope you're all having a great day! Thank you again for everything!! Enjoy!
Chapter End Notes:
Song Credit-
Jessica Andrews - You're the man that brings the woman out of me
Jessica Andrews - You're the man that brings the woman out of me
Story Tags: daddyj
