Justin

                Email after email, I can't seem to think straight anymore. All these numbers seem to be one big blur to me after reading theme for hours on end. I really didn't care at this point. Shouldn't an accountant be worrying about all these numbers and figures and dealing with it before it came to my desk? Maybe I should hire someone to just do my paperwork. I would really like to walk into this office and slap my feet up on the desk and only be here to be here. That would be a waste of money though, especially when it's something I can handle, I just don't want to.

9:00 Budget Meeting: Snooze fest

James is sitting there attempting to explain every detail to me.  "Profit is up for the record company this year. It looks like Tom had really stretched the budget last year and spent a little too much on little things."

"Little things could make all the difference. He did what he thought was correct. I'm glad that the profit it up this year. That is wonderful." Justin says after maybe the first thing he actually heard him say.

Maybe I'm actually doing some good by being here every day. He thought to himself.

"Southern Hospitality's numbers improved as well."

"And William Rast?" I asked.

Jared looks down at the paper work, flipping the pages back and forth three or four times, "William Rast's profits and sales have tripled." He looks shocked. "Last year's numbers are remarkable."

"Melissa knows what she is doing." He says with pride in his voice.

"She really has stepped up and helped that line succeed far beyond what we had planned out for five years. She is remarkable in that position."

"She is my wife after all."

"Rub in it Mr. Timberlake."

I just smile at him and he finally leaves the office.  Here I was alone in the office again. I can hear the clock on the wall ticking it is so quiet. Tick. Tick. Tick. I couldn't handle the quietness anymore.

"Mandy... can you please get me a dock for my iPod... I can't take it so quiet in here anymore." I bellow out of the office door.

You want me to go now." She asks.

"Would you please... wait scrap that idea... I will go." I jumped up from my chair. I had to get out of the office for a little while. "I will be back. Get messages from anyone that needs me. I have my phone is something major happens."

Stepping out of the office doors and heading towards my car I felt a sense of freedom and release the moment the fresh air hit my face. I almost wanted to throw my arms up in the air as if I had just been released from jail. I jump in my car and drove slower than normal. I drove on the outside of the L.A. just to get a dock for my iPod. I wanted to waste as much as I possibly could. It was only 10:00am... if I could waste and hour here, grab lunch on the way back to the office then I would only have to spend about an hour there and then head to the studio... this could work.

Taking a lot shorter time that I wanted to, I returned to the office and ate my lunch then counted the minutes down until I would leave the office. Fifteen minutes... I can't take it anymore.

"I'm headed to the studio. See you in the morning Mandy." I say it without even stopping. I had to get out of there.

Studio time today wasn't so much of a gateway today neither. Everything seemed to be falling apart. Why couldn't I handle simple tasks anymore?

"Elizabeth, we have been working on this same track for a month.... You were three hours late today... I don't know what the problem is. I can't continue to waste time in the studio with you. I'm throwing money away by being here day after day for nothing. Nothing is coming out of these sessions. I really think you need to focus on the music right now and that's it."

"Justin I have told you that I'm working this studio time in with my other job." She snaps back.

"I pay your expenses to live here in L.A. Why do you have another job?"

"It's a family business thing." She just stood there as if she didn't care what I thought about it.

Frustrated I open my mouth and say exactly what he was thinking. "Well this is it. This is the last session until you decide what you want. You have the vocals and talent... you just can't seem to focus at all."

"It's my family. I can't bail out on them."

"Maybe they need to accept that this is your possible future you're throwing away. I have spent nearly two million dollars on your future and honestly the three tracks we have finished are not going to work well if we get nothing else great out of it... I'm serious. This is it. I have other artists that need my time and I would love to spend some time with my wife tonight."

"So this has nothing to do with me, it has to do with your precious wife needing you to be at home?"

"Elizabeth." I was pissed, "I warned you about speaking ill towards my wife. You have to learn some respect. If my wife would have needed me to be at home I would have already left. I want to spend time with my wife instead of wasting it here, getting nothing accomplished."

I finished exactly what I was doing, packed my things up and left the studio.

Melissa

                The William Rast offices seem to be a buzz today.  The phones have been nonstop ringing. I was glad that I was in the design room with Ms. Kia, I could spent all day in this room. Being in here and creating new pieces is like being in the studio and recording new music for me. I loved it.

                As much as I enjoyed designing clothing, I knew that Justin hasn't been himself for quite some time. Slowly he has become this distant person, slowly pushing me away.

                "There is something wrong with Justin. He doesn't seem like the same person anymore. He doesn't enjoy the same things anymore. He has become someone I don't even recognize anymore."

                Kia just sits there staring at me if I was going to come with the answer on my own. There was a reason I was expressing this to her. "What is different?"

"It's just everything. He used to want to do things, go places... now he's just blah after he comes home from the office."

"Has the office been stressful lately?"

"I don't think so. He doesn't complain about anything... he just pushes me out of that part of his life."

"Is everything fine between the two of you?"

"As far as I'm aware of?"

"I mean do you guys still... ya know..." Kia attempts not to say the word.

"If you are asking if we still have sex... yes... we have sex more than most normal couples do. That part of our relationship has never changed."

She lies down the pattern she was working on, "Do you think he blames himself for you both not having kids yet?"

"He believes that it's his fault..."

"That is a lot of pressure to have on him."

"I know... we went to several different doctors and they have all said there isn't a problem with either of us, it just works sometimes and sometimes and doesn't. Even when I tell him that is nothing we are doing wrong or wrong with us he just pushes it aside like everything else."

"Hmm defiantly not the Justin we have known. Maybe it is just a phase. Maybe it's something he needs to go through and deal with."

"He is my husband; I should be able to figure this out."

                I wanted so badly to walk in the front door today and just say, ‘Sit, we need to talk.' But it wasn't that kind of situation. I knew that if I questioned him on it, he would hide it even further. I needed to figure out what was wrong with him.

                I got home that night pretty early considering I thought he was going to be in the studio with Elizabeth for at least a couple more hours, I was hoping to get dinner done before he got home. But his car was in the garage, he was already home. I unloaded the groceries and dropped them in the kitchen and walked through the house looking for him. He wasn't in the living room, the office, the bedroom, the screening room, and he wasn't outside. "Justin" I yelled but got no answer. This house may have twice as many rooms as the old house but he couldn't hide from me. There is a slight noise that I haven't heard in quite some time. The noise was coming from the basement. Could he really be in the studio? I walked down the stairs, to my surprise he was not only in the studio, he was in the booth. I didn't step into the room completely. I could see how content he was in there.

                I stood there watching him in awe. The passion that was gone from Justin's eyes, was right there. The man I married was standing in that booth singing his heart out. That is the Justin I fell in love with. He is smiling the way he used to smile.

                His lyrics weren't something that I had heard before. His soulful voice projected through the booth with perfection. He seemed to be stuck on one chorus.

"I've been thinking I should leave... Make it easier... When you find somebody... To love you better... The one I can't let go... And little piece of her... The girl I fell in love with... And never will deserve"

I tears start to fall down my face. Could this be what he has been hiding from me?  He thinks he doesn't deserve me?  I'm the lucky one. I should count my blessings that a man like him loves me so. Maybe he was writing this for someone else. He was a writer after all.

            There was something I never thought would even cross our minds. I was going to another one of those couples who end in divorce.