Divorce is a Bitter Pill to Swallow-Chapter 4

Darrien entered her sister’s bedroom early afternoon to an image of Darnell, clad in a pair of Superman pajamas pants, a white tank, and stretched out on her stomach with her knees bent and her feet swinging in the air.

She was oblivious to her sister’s presence as she eagerly flipped through the pages of the recent issues of Game Informer and Animation Magazine. Being equally interested in the drawing that she was now completing on the drawing pad, her pencil flew across her paper.

Beside her in her own little corner of the bed, Jordin had her own set of drawing paper and Crayola crayons as she peeked over at her mother’s drawing and attempted to imitate. She scribbled an orange and red spiral-like shape across her paper and asked for her mother’s opinion.

“This good mommy?” Darnell offered a simple, “mmm hmm.” However, Jordin was full of smiles afterwards.

“ Dee?” Darrien finally announced herself.

“Hmm?” She raised her brows to her but not her eyes.

“What are you doing?”

“Drawing.” Darrien rolled her eyes at the reply.

“Well no shh-shoot.” She spied a quick glance at Jordin, who must have not heard the slip-up otherwise; she would have admonished her Aunt for it, as her own grandmother would have done.

Darrien moved the stack of magazines aside to make room for herself on the full size bed. She bumped her sister’s shoulder in the process.

“Hey!” Darnell whined and scooted over. Much to her displeasure, several of Jordin’s crayons stabbed her in the side. As she carefully picked them away, her sister used the moment to snatch away her drawing pad and studied it.

“Darrien! Give it back!” She tried to snatch the pad from her sister’s grasp. However, Darrien held it out of reach.

“Dang Dee, you never let anyone see your drawings as if they suck or something. But they are always fabulous.” She smiled suddenly, “You remember the first drawing of yours that you let me see?”

“Let you see? You mean the one you stole out of my backpack?” Darnell sat up to better observe her sister’s reactions to the pages of the pad.

“Whatever. You remember what you drew?” She only paused for a second, not exactly expecting her sister to answer. “You drew Justin.”

“I did not.” Darnell lied, yet heat raced up the back of her neck at the memory. It had been her junior year, second semester. She and Justin were using their study hall period to finish their homework in the library. However, while Justin was struggling with his math assignment, she sat beside him and discreetly sketched his profile.

She remembered how much detail she had put into the sketch, especially his sharp jaw line and his wavy hair, which at the time had reached his chin. The day she finished it, she rushed home to tuck it in one of her dresser drawers, yet Darrien took it before she could. Her sister was the first and only person to ever see that drawing.

“You did and it was so beautiful. Lord girl, I could tell from that one drawing that you were so in love with his punk rock, dorky ass. Hell, you still you are; only he’s a little less dorkish now. God bless him.” She laughed while Darnell tensed uncomfortably. She could already sense where this conversation was heading.

“But yeah these sketches are amazing. You seriously have to send these into one of those major animation companies.”

“I know.” Darnell mumbled. She had been telling herself that for years, but never put forth the effort because she was afraid of rejection. She knew all the people would think her sketches were beautiful but as soon as they realized she had only a high school diploma, a semester’s worth of college credits, and no technical experience, they weren’t as eager to hire her. And since she couldn’t get her dream job she somehow let her mother, who despised her choice of profession, convince her that is was much better to be a housewife.

“So when are you going to do that?”

Darnell shrugged. “I don’t know, but now isn’t the time.”

“Yeah obviously with you living here and not at home with your husband.”

As soon as her sister began, Darnell rolled her eyes and flopped down on the bed. She glanced over at Jordin, grateful that she was content with her coloring book rather than listening in on their conversation. “My therapy session isn’t until four thank you.”

“Okay I’ll give you that one.” Darrien relented, instead she returned to analyzing her sister’s drawings. She flipped a few more pages before voicing her opinion.

“Uh-oh somebody had Justin on the brain.” Darrien looked over her shoulder with a goofy grin brightening her features.

Darnell instantly sat up to inspect her own work. “Oh that’s an old one.” She replied coolly.

“Sure.” Darrien smirked and studied the sketch further. “Why does he look like a super villain?”

“I think I was mad.” She shrugged. “I was sitting here looking at Jordin this morning and she looks so much like him it made me mad.”

Darrien laughed at her sister’s frown. “Oh wait, I thought you said this was an old one.”

Now caught in a lie, Darnell folded her arms across her chest and pouted, “Leave me alone.”

“Aww Dee,” she pulled her close, “You’re right though Jordin doesn’t look a thing like you. Oh hold up I think she has the Simmons nose-oops never mind.” Darrien laughed loudly when her sister huffed and shoved her away.

“I need to go get the girls from school and then drop them all off at mom’s, yippee.” She feigned excitement.

“Oh mom’s not that bad.”

“You only say that because she can’t harass you about your marriage anymore with you being divorced and all. I, on the other hand am not as fortunate. You see how she’s forcing me to go to therapy by paying for it all. And because I don’t want to waste her money I go.”

“Yeah but you leave before it’s over every time.”

“I only did that twice.” She defended, while pulling a tee shirt over her head. She considered changing her pajama pants, but then reminded herself that she wasn’t the one that cared about her looks. No that was Darrien, the one who studied cosmetology in high school and currently worked as a hairdresser. Looking at her now, you wouldn’t believe that she had just rolled out of bed. Her pajamas were fashionable down to her matching slippers and her auburn-dyed hair still maintained last week’s roller set.

Darnell envied her for two reasons: she always looked good and she was two sizes smaller, wearing a twelve.

“Of course you only had two sessions so far.” Darrien purposely added before letting the subject drop. “So you want me to do something to your hair real quick before you leave?”

“Nope.” She snatched it back into a simple ponytail instead. She kneeled to look under the bed for her red flip-flops.

“You’re not going to change at least?” Darrien grimaced, when her sister again said no. She eyed the phrase stretched across her sister’s ample bosom. “But Dee your shirt says ‘Got Milk?’ Do you really want to bring that kind of attention to yourself?”

“Well, I didn’t plan on getting out of the car. And besides this shirt is nothing compared to those sweatpants you brought me with juicy written across the ass. Oh Jordin go pack up your toys.” She wanted to get her out of the room before she said any more “bad wurds”, as Jordin would say.

Darrien stared thoughtfully at the toddler’s back as she skipped out of the room. “I wish Calvin and I could’ve had at least one baby before we got divorce.”

“You can have one of mine.” Her sister instantly offered, causing her to purse her lips.

“Sorry girl but you and Calvin weren’t right for each other. Getting married was your second mistake. Letting mom pick your husband was your first.” Darnell fixed her sister with a critical stare as she slipped on her flip-flops.

“I was young and-”

“Stupid. Let’s not forget that.”

“Right. Let’s not.” She rolled her eyes with a smirk. “But being young shouldn’t be an excuse. You married Justin when you were young.”

“Yeah I remember that day, Michal and Kori were flower girls, yup, I clearly remember that.” There was a tinge of sarcasm in her tone.

“Hold up, are you trying to say that you married Justin because of the kids? I know that isn’t what you’re saying.” Darrien stood, hands already on her hips as she prepared to argue with her younger sister. Darnell immediately looked away.

“I’m not trying to say anything.”

“Oh, because if I remember correctly you technically proposed to Justin. Not the other way around.”

Darnell sighed, “Please don’t remind me.”

“And you brought your own engagement ring.” Darrien continued as if her sister hadn’t asked her not to.

“Justin wasn’t known to have a sense of fashion, granted neither did I, but I thought he would’ve picked out something ugly.” Therefore, five years ago, she brought her own ring.

After two months of saving while working at Electronic Boutique, she purchased a simple diamond ring from the pawnshop. She hid it in her purse for weeks before she finally admitted to herself that she was tired of playing house in a small two-bedroom apartment with two kids. She waited in the living room for Justin to get off work and then they would talk about marriage. Only the discussion didn’t go as planned. Justin spied the ring on Darnell’s hand, which soon led to an argument.

“What is that on your finger?”

“An engagement ring.” She decided not to tiptoe around the subject.

“From where? Who gave you that?” He jumped from the couch and began pacing around the living room. Each time Darnell attempted to respond he cut off her with a wave of his hand. It was the most domineering he had ever been since they had met each other years ago, and without saying a thing.

Justin suddenly turned towards Darnell, catching her off guard.

“Is your mother trying to make you marry some ideal man she has picked out for you like she did Darrien? Because if she is I swear-”

“No!” Darnell laughed aloud at Justin’s assumption. She had never seen him get so worked up. “Well maybe if we didn’t have kids she’d sure as hell try to.” Justin instantly frowned, “But I wouldn’t go without a fight.”

“You’d fight your mother to stay with me?”

Darnell scoffed, “Hell yeah.”

“Why?” Justin settled his hands on lean hips and waited for her answer.

“Why wouldn’t I?”

“That’s not what I wanted to hear.”

Darnell shrugged, “Then what do you want me to say?” Justin offered no response. He figured she would come up with one in her own time. Soon she started rambling.

“I mean we have two kids so it only makes sense to be together.” Justin’s frown deepened. “Since forever you’re the only guy I have ever had something in common with. I would be no use to someone else.”

“And?” He liked what he was hearing so he moved back to his previous seat beside her on their small loveseat.

“I don’t think anyone else would put up with me and my mother.”

“True. And?”

“You love me.” She grinned arrogantly.

“Crazy about you. And?” Darnell melted at Justin’s admission. She decided to come clean about the ring.

“I want you to marry me.”

“What?” He drew back a little, confused by the sudden request.

“I want you to marry me. That’s why I brought this ring.”

“But Dee I thought-”

“You don’t wanna get married?” She looked offended.

“Don’t put words in my mouth. I never said I didn’t wanna marry you. You said you didn’t want to get married. You said that Dee, it was you.” Justin pointed an accusing finger at her from the other side of the couch.

“That was six years ago!” She tossed her arms to the ceiling. “Things change and besides I didn’t want to get married back then just because I was pregnant with Michal. I was living with Darrien and Calvin and you were living with your mom. It would’ve been a mistake.”

Confused, Justin scratched the cheek-length scruffy locks he called hair, “So you brought me an engagement ring?”

“No boy, it’s mine.”

Justin was stunned. “You brought your own engagement ring then?” She nodded. He chewed on his bottom lip contemplatively while scrutinizing the ring.

“It’s nice, but I would’ve chosen something different, better.” He quickly removed the ring from her finger.

“Hey!” She snatched her hand away too late. “Give that back!” She shrieked and then he returned it, yet he suddenly had something else for her; a diamond ring in between his thumb and index finger. He also had saved money to purchase it.

The ring was slightly bigger than the one Darnell chose. Although not her favorite shade of blue, it was a very light, nearly the color of a white diamond. Darnell loved it.

“Justin! Why didn’t you tell me? I could’ve saved my money.” She playfully jabbed him in the arm. Only after he howled did she pull his face close, kiss him, and say that she loved him.

“You should’ve told me that you were ready to get married. Anyway which one are you going to wear?” He had asked, but she had never been able to make a choice. Hence, in the present day she still wore both rings. Justin’s ring on her left hand accompanied by a simple wedding band and the ring she purchased for herself on her right.

“Mommy gave y’all a beautiful backyard wedding though.” Darrien had a reminiscent smile on her face.

“Well, we couldn’t afford the big extravagant wedding you had.”

“Obviously, that was money wasted. Look at who’s still married.”

“Humph barely.” Darnell murmured.

“ Dee I will kill you before I let you get a divorce.”

“I know mom already told me the same thing last week.”

“Darnell, where are these feelings coming from?” Darrien sighed. “I thought you loved Justin.”

“I do.”

“And I thought you were happy.” Darnell hesitated to answer this time.

“Actually I’m not happy. I don’t have a job. I don’t go out. My whole life is my kids. I play the housewife routine as good as mom but it’s not for me. I didn’t get married just to be at home everyday. That’s not what I planned for myself. All I’m known for is being a mother. That’s all I did with my life.” Unwanted tears soon stung the back of her eyes, but she didn’t dare let them fall. If she cried, she would do so alone.

“I’m twenty seven years old and when I haven’t seen someone in a while and they ask me what I’ve been doing, all I can honestly say is popping out babies! By my twenty-fifth birthday, I had two kids and one on the way. Hey, but you know who is actually happy about that…mom. I’m sure she wanted me stuck at home like her so that she could finally say that we have something in common and would no longer have to convince herself that she must’ve taken the wrong baby from the hospital.”

“I’m sure mom doesn’t feel that way-” Darnell turned quickly and set sharp eyes on her sister.

“Have you asked her? No? You should. Ask her about me and see what she tells you. No better yet, ask her what she thinks about me going to school for animation. I bet she’ll set up a nice little segue way before asking you to get me a job working at the salon.” Darnell laughed dryly.

“Like I said, she would rather see me at home miserable, and know I’m miserable, than help me go back to school for what I want to do.” She started for the door until Darrien jumped up in front of her.

“Mommy’s your problem and not Justin?”

“Justin is Justin.” Darnell shrugged. Her sigh hinted at something she chose not to explain and Darrien didn’t pressure her.

“So you want to go to school and you need help. I can-” Darnell began shaking her head immediately, “Well, maybe if you talked to Justin-”

“It’s really not in our budget trust me.”

“Okay, well…” Darrien hesitated to continue, knowing an outburst was imminent, “Your last choices are mom and daddy or a loan.”

“I guess I need to go apply for a loan then.”

“Have you even asked her? No? You should.”

Darnell folded her arms and engaged in a stare off with her older sister. Seeing as Darrien wasn’t going to give in anytime soon, she eventually had to. “I’ll go see her right now.”

“Call her and tell her I’ll be there in forty-five minutes.” She rushed out of the bedroom with Darrien hot on her heels and sputtering away. She yanked the car keys off a side table and scooped up Jordin and her belongings then targeted the front door.

“ Dee hold up! If you go talk to her then you won’t make it to therapy.”

Darnell opened the door, secured her purse to her shoulder and Jordin to her hip, before glaring at her sister once more. “Exactly.”

~*~*~*~*~*~

As she turned down the block where her mother resided, Darnell slowed as she neared the house. “What in the…” Darnell’s face twisted into confusion as she spotted her mother dashing down the driveway in one of her high-priced tracksuits and her newly dyed and cut shoulder-length hair whipping in the spring breeze.

Michal opened her eyes and raised her head from the headrest as a harsh knock sounded at the window.

Her grandmother pulled the door open for her but when she hadn’t gotten out, Victoria yelled, “Come on your mother has to go!” an impatient scowl marring her face.

“Kori Lynn let your sister out.” Victoria grabbed the children’s bags and tossed it over her shoulder after they all exited the car.

“Bye Darnell. Girls say bye to your mother.”

“I’m not leaving.” Darnell finally spoke up after watching her mother’s ridiculous antics. Victoria was apparently trying to get her off to therapy on time, even though she was already late.

“What do you mean? Are you not going?” The bags slacked on her arm as she peered suspiciously at her daughter.

“No because I know what my problems are…” She took a long pause before continuing, “We need to talk.” Darnell lifted Jordin into her arms and entered the house.

With a confused shrug, Victoria had no choice but to follow behind her daughter.

“Grandma Victoria can I have some juice?” Kori skipped into the kitchen behind them.

Victoria didn’t bother to acknowledge her granddaughter, instead she kept her gaze fixed on Darnell and said, “Ask your mother.”

Darnell walked over to the refrigerator and retrieved four juice boxes. She handed two to Kori and one to Jordin. Kori smiled before grabbing her little sister’s hand and following Michal to the basement.

As soon as the children had left the room, Victoria had let Darnell have it.

“Darnell I’m waiting for you to tell me why you aren’t at therapy trying to make your marriage work.” Victoria folded her arms across her chest as she eyed her daughter.

Darnell removed her light jacket and draped it over the back of the chair choosing not to respond to her mother just yet. Instead, she asked about her father’s whereabouts. “Where’s Daddy?”

A frown marred Victoria’s unblemished coffee brown features, and then she quickly masked her disappointment. “He’s probably at your uncle’s house.”

“Which one? I might stop by. I keep missing him every time I drop the kids off.” Darnell poked a hole through the opening of the juice box and intended to drink it before her mother snatched it from her as if she were a child who had done wrong.

“Do not try to change the subject Darnell Ebony Simmons.” Her mother’s voice had trembled a bit before she continued, “Are you going to therapy or not?”

Victoria’s distressed demeanor surprised Darnell, but what surprised her more was that her mother, Miss Prim and Proper, was now drinking from a juice box.

“Ma, I’m not going to therapy. I just don’t see the point right now.” She went to the refrigerator to retrieve another juice box.

“Darnell do not allow me to waste my money. I am trying to save your marriage.” Victoria exclaimed crushing the cardboard juice box against the granite counter.

Standing in front of an open refrigerator, Darnell whirled around to face her mother. “That’s just it. I don’t need you to save my marriage. It’s my marriage not yours mom. And I really wish you would spend your money on something I really need.” Darnell sighed fiddling with the stray hairs at her nape, something she did when she was frustrated.

“Therapy is something you need. Justin is trying to make it work, but you insist on being difficult just to spite me I guess. You must not love your husband enough.”

Darnell was appalled by her mother’s audacity to question her love for Justin and she allowed her shock to show on her face. The problems in their marriage had nothing to do with love lost between them. The fact that her mother had brought it up goes to show that Victoria really didn’t know her daughter that well.

“Oh please Ma, don’t even go there.” Darnell scoffed, her mother surely did have her priorities mixed up. She released another exasperated sigh. “Look ma, I didn’t come over here to argue with you.”

“Well, what did you come over here for then? If this argument is so pointless you can be on your way to therapy.”

“Ma.” Darnell rolled her eyes while her mother simply glanced at her watch.

“If you leave right now you might catch the end of the session. I’m sure Ava and Justin will catch you up on what you missed.”

“Mom.” She chewed on her bottom lip, annoyed as her mother continued to ignore her.

“Why are you still standing here looking at me when you could have left already?”

“Mommy!” The loud shriek made Victoria’s eyes widen in shock. Darnell never called her mommy unless she was fighting for her attention, which she was now.

Three pairs of feet rumbled up the stairs and three little heads peeked around the open doorway to secretly spy.

“What? What are you yelling for?”

“Because you’re not listening. You never listen. I said I didn’t want to talk about therapy but you still have to find a way. You always have to have the last word.” Darnell slammed the refrigerator door and frustratingly yanked a hand through her long locks.

Still somewhat stunned, Victoria’s eyes darted around the kitchen, “What did you want to talk about?”

“School. I want to go back to school.” At the mentioning of school, the children lost interest and Michal carried Jordin back to the basement while Kori followed.

“Why?” Victoria turned her nose up at her daughter’s suggestion.

“I don’t know maybe I want to do something besides stay home all day.”

“Don’t mock me.” Her mother warned and Darnell routinely rolled her eyes. “What about your children?”

“I don’t have to be home 24/7. I can go to school and be a good mother too, Mom.”

“Well, you could be a better one?”

“What are you trying to say?” Darnell’s question was asked through clenched teeth.

“Well…if you could cook for one, and if you bothered to fix yourself up every once in a while.” She frowned at Darnell’s child-like superhero pajamas.

Victoria had never hid the fact that she had wished her youngest daughter was more feminine or more like her oldest, Darrien. She had always thought that by the time Darnell started dating, she would change her look. When that didn’t happened, she hoped that marriage would make Darnell see the error of her ways. At least she would attempt to look nice for her husband, as a wife should. Of course, neither of Victoria’s wishes or hopes became a reality.

Darnell was as much a tomboy today as she was all those many years ago.

“Thank goodness Darrien does the girls hair. Otherwise, they would walk around looking like shrubs in need of a trim with that wild hair they inherited from their father. You should let her do something to yours soon though.” Why did her mother insist on discussing the most trivial of subjects?

She had easily changed the subject from school to hair and Darnell had spent the first few minutes unintentionally indulging her until she realized that her mother had pushed her ideas aside as usual.

“Mom, who the hell cares about how I look?” She asked quickly and cut her mother off before she could say what was burning on the tip of her tongue. “School is all I want to talk about and if that’s not going to happen, then I’m going to leave and you can most definitely forget about me even considering therapy.”

Following Darnell’s command and reference to therapy, Victoria knew she had to compromise. She went to sit at the kitchen table and directed Darnell to join her. Darnell took her time before heeding to her mother’s request.

“Okay what is the real reason you want to go back to school?” Her mother asked in her best “I’m totally interested in what you have to say” voice.

“I want to pursue video game animation.” Darnell replied fiercely as if her nerves weren’t getting the best of her right now. She had never once told her mother of her dreams and it didn’t seem to matter once she had a family and a husband.

“You’re still stuck on those video games? I would have thought you had grown out of that by now. Seriously is there actually a degree for that?” Darnell was waiting for her mother to laugh so she could get in on the joke, but it never came. Apparently, the joke was on her for believing that her mother would be supportive of her decision. Either way, Darnell shrugged off her mother’s comments and pretended not to be hurt.

“I want to start classes in the fall at one of the community colleges. I’ll go part-time during the day while Kori and Michal are in school. Maybe Jordin can go to a daycare; I don’t know if we can afford it though. Darrien might be willing to watch her whenever she’s home or perhaps you could, Mrs. Stay-at-home mom?” Darnell fixed her mother with a questioning smirk.

Victoria waved away her daughter’s taunting comment. “You’re actually serious about this?” When Darnell simply nodded, she began ranting. “Who is going to pay for these so-called classes for this so-called degree? I know Justin isn’t making that much driving for UPS or working at the photography studio. And did you forget what happened the last time you tried to go to school?”

Darnell closed her eyes to ward off the stab of pain at the memory, which her mother conveniently brought up. She still hadn’t been able to fully put that behind her although it happened more than three years ago. But she didn’t dare reveal her grief under the scrutiny of her mother.

“I mean of course the circumstances are different but you cannot handle the busy schedule with three young kids. And what about Justin?

“What about him? He’s doing what he wants to do at the photography studio.”

“You are going to lose him if you keep acting the way you are. You already moved out and then if you let school get in the way…”

“I’ve already lost him. We didn’t talk at home but all of the sudden we’re supposed to talk in therapy. Let some stranger all up in our business? Whatever.”

“She’s not going to tell me what I don’t already know.” She paused, “The only ones who are benefiting from this is Justin, who has a problem with realizing problems before it’s too late. And you of course, who just wants to brag that you helped me just like you bragged about setting Darien up with her first husband, who was a total let down by the way.”

Following Darnell’s disclosure, Victoria actually had the nerve to look guilty.

“Darrien only married him and stayed married for all those years because she has some crazy desire to please you. I on other hand have long ago stopped worrying what you think since you never supported me in any way.”

“This is about school again right? You know I cannot support that not after last time. You went to school against my advice and in the end you made the wrong choice. And I will never forgive you for what happened to my grandchild.”

Earlier, Darnell chose not to respond to her mother’s negativity, yet now her attempt at being impassive abruptly ended. She stood glaring at her mother as she felt the painful sting of her words. “Mother…” She inhaled a deep breath, “I said what I came to say so you know what…”

She paused to turn her gaze towards the bright white kitchen cabinets because she couldn’t stand to look at her mother, who was now wearing a face of shame for the words that she had mistakenly spoken but wholeheartedly meant.

“I’m just going to see myself out. I’ll talk to you whenever. Tell daddy I’ll call him.” She started to walk out of the kitchen and then halted. Thinking her daughter was about to light into her with a few colorful words that she rightfully deserved, Victoria’s eyes widened.

“Michal! Kori! Jordin! Let’s go, now!” Then Darnell stalked to the door. Heavy footsteps thundered up the basement stairs once again. Three sets of curious eyes studied Victoria’s distressed expression before rushing to bestow goodbye hugs.

“Bye Grandma Victoria.”

“Goodbye darlings.” She murmured defeated as she watched them walk out behind their mother. The anticipated continuation of their argument never happened.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Justin’s fingers drummed against his armrest while his eyes were glued to the clock. He watched each minute slowly tick by until he had unknowingly been staring at the clock for a full twenty minutes. Now half-way into the session, therapist, Ava Jennings decided to pull him from his trance.

“So can we assume that this will be another individual session?”

“No!” Justin bellowed before his voice softened, “She’ll be here. She’s just probably running late. She had to pick up the kids from school and then drop them off with my in-law’s across town.”

“Okay well can I ask some questions while we wait a few more minutes?” Ava adjusted her glasses.

“Sure why not.” Exhaling a deep breath, he scratched his goatee before meeting Ava’s slanted eyes, attributed to her Chinese and African-American heritage.

“Tell me about your three sons, Michael, Cory, and, Jordan.”

“Actually I have three daughters, Michal, Kori, and Jordin.” He proceeded to give the correct spellings of their names. “ Dee has a bit of a fascination with male names I guess. Well actually, she’s just obsessed with Michal Jordan that’s how she named two of our daughters. I had no say in that. I was allowed to name Kori, but made sure to keep with her tradition.”

“Is that a tradition her mother started?”

“Oh hell no. Her mother hates it that Darnell and her sister have boy names. Hates it.”

“Okay.” She jotted something on her notepad. “How is Mrs. Timberlake’s relationship with her mother?”

“Um you might want to ask Dee these questions. She could give you a better answer.” For someone who had been so talkative a few minutes ago, he hadn’t had much to say on the subject.

Even outside the therapy sessions, he remained out of the matters of Darnell and her mother. He didn’t want her to discuss the countless arguments they had because he couldn’t stand to see Darnell upset about it and she didn’t care for his advice anymore. Whenever she argued with her mother, she’d come home and argue with him. It was a never-ending cycle until they started ignoring each other all together.

“Well does her relationship with her mother put a damper on your marriage?”

“I said I didn’t want to talk about it but if you’re asking if her mother is the reason we stop having sex before Dee moved out then I’ll say yes.”

“Hmm.” Ava raised her eyebrow skeptically and whipped out her pen to take more notes. She returned the pen to its station behind her ear.

“So you’re blaming your mother-in-law for your sexless marriage?”

“Yes she frustrates Dee and a frustrated Dee can’t get excited about sex. Furthermore, she doesn’t even want to bother with it. When she moved out, you know after she kicked me out and I moved back, it was apparently because she had to be away from me to get herself together. She couldn’t focus because she would have to tend my needs instead of her own. What do you think of that?”

“I actually agree with that.”

“Well yeah who the hell asked you?” Justin snapped.

“You did Mr. Timberlake.” She smirked.

“So…”

“How is your relationship with you mother?”

“Cool. She knows her limits. It took her a long time to respect them but everything’s cool now. I didn’t even tell her that Dee and I are separated otherwise she’d be raising hell.”

“Are you sure it was a good choice not to tell her?”

“Yeah Dee and I won’t be separated for much longer.”

“You sound pretty sure about that.”

“Yes I am.” Justin replied with a definite smirk of his own.

“Oh and when do you anticipate this reunion?”

“As soon as I can make it happen.”

Ava smiled a little, setting aside her notepad, “And if you’re wife isn’t ready?” She didn’t wait for his response.

“What if she wants to drag out the separation until she feels she could be a better wife? Better yet what if she’s just done with you and wants a divorce?”

“Hey don’t use that word. We are not getting a divorce. Dee still wants to be with me. You heard her say that, you heard her.” He was beginning to sound like a desperate little boy.

“Yes in retrospect, but-”

“She still loves me.” He was now perched on the edge of his chair.

Ava sighed. “I’m sure she does, however-”

“Let’s just postpone this conversation for when Dee gets here.” He folded his arms across his chest and sat back in his chair.

Ava glanced at her watch and emitted another sigh. “Our session is practically over. Your wife isn’t coming.” Justin tried not to show his disappointment as he abruptly stood.

“I guess I’ll see you in two days.” He snatched up his coat.

“Yes and we’ll discuss how the children are handling the…separation.” Ava’s last words met the back of the door after Justin’s hasty exited.

~*~*~*~*~

Justin thought he was going to jump out of his car the moment he parked in front of his sister-in-law’s house. However, that was not the case. As angry as he was at Dee for deliberately skipping today’s session, he seemed more content to stalk outside rather than go inside and have that dreaded argument with her.

His decision whether to stay outside or not was made when the front door opened and his daughters came sprinting down the walkway.

Jordin being the daddy’s girl of the three was right in front and screaming his name the entire way. Justin exited the car in time for her to throw her small frame into his. She wrapped her short arms around his knees, forcing him to stand still and acknowledge her.

Staring into her face that had so many of his features and apparently none of her mother’s, he actually felt his anger diminishing. >Jordin’s grayish blue eyes twinkled as she told her father what she did today.

“Me and mommy were drawing. She drew you daddy.”

“She did?” Justin eyes widened as if he was excited when he was actually confused. He had never known Dee to draw portraits of him, ever. It was always cartoon characters and such that she created.

“Uh huh. She make you ugly daddy!” Jordin politely covered her mouth while emitting a fit of giggles.

“I’m not surprised.” Justin murmured, lifted Jordin into his arms, and then looked to his other two girls. “What’s up Mike?”

“I’m cool.” As always, she stood with her hands on her hips, and was frowning much like her mother used to and still does. “What’s up daddy?” She raised her chin to him as if she wasn’t nearly as tall as he was already.

“I’m cool too.” Justin shook his head while cracking a small smile. Michal had clearly spent too much time with him and her Uncle Drew/Godfather when she was a toddler.

“How was school?”

Michal immediately scrunched up her face and plucked away a loose brown curl. She yanked on the hem of her ruffled denim skirt that he was sure her fashionista aunt had purchased. “I had to take a spelling test today. Mommy helped me study.”

Justin simply nodded and stuffed his hand into his pocket. He finally glanced at Kori who had been patiently waiting her turn as always. He wouldn’t exactly say that she was suffering from middle child syndrome. It was more so her laidback personality that made her rarely compete for attention.

She was like her father in which she would wait until acknowledged. However, her outer appearance, except for her light coloring and wild hair, was all Dee. Her face was plump and round, with similarly shaped dark brown eyes. Looking at her current short stature, he knew she would grow up to be no taller than her mother’s 5’4 frame.

“Hey Kori.” He used his free hand to pull her to his side and then ruffled her mop of curls as usual. In fact, she was the only one that allowed it. Jordin had been practically trained in etiquette and grace by her grandmother while Michal was simply too grown to allow her father to play in her hair.

“Hi daddy.”

“That’s all you have to say?” She was quiet but she did enjoy talking about what she did in school each day. “What’s wrong?”

“Mommy’s mad.” Kori began, “She’s in her room. And she locked the door.”

“>Gran’ma was mean.” Jordin offered. “She a poopie head cuz she made mommy cry.” Her lips poked out dramatically. Justin stifled a laugh at the thought of Victoria being a poopie head.

“Is that true Mikey? What did Grandma say?” He asked her because he knew she was famous for eavesdropping.

“I dunno. I forgot to eavesdrop, but mommy went straight to her room and locked the door. She was so mad she didn’t even open it for Auntie Darrien. I didn’t see her crying though.”

Justin sighed, “Alright Mike tell mommy to come outside for a minute.”

“Good luck.” Michal had the nerve to say before walking ahead.

Justin rolled his eyes and childishly stuck his tongue out at the back of his oldest daughter’s head. He lowered Jordin to the ground, she grasped Kori’s hand and then they followed Michal inside.

As always, Justin observed the landscaping of his sister-in-law’s house while he waited for Darnell. There was never a dull moment whenever he took in the details of Darrien’s home.

It was much different from his brick row house that was semi-detached with a large yard and tall tree out front. Darrien’s house was a substantially large four-bedroom structure with a patio and deck and curved cobblestone driveway. She had an arrangement of plants enclosing the façade of the house and stylish outdoor furniture located on the porch. The beautiful house was the only item she requested and received during the divorce proceedings.

While Justin became fascinated by the house, Darnell suddenly appeared in the open doorway. She leaned her hip against the frame as Justin stared as if he hadn’t yet noticed her. It wasn’t until she clamped her hands together behind her back and began sauntering towards him that he blinked and acknowledged her.

He wasn’t smiling. He wasn’t frowning. He simply stared blankly while leaning against the car with his arms folded. Darnell stopped in front of him, the top of her head reaching just below his chin.

Darnell swiped her hair away from her face, “Michal said you wanted me.”

“Yeah I wanted you to come to therapy.”

“Oh well, pfff. I didn’t feel like it.” Darnell shrugged and headed back up the walkway. She promptly entered the house and proceeded to her bedroom. Knowing that Justin would follow regardless, she didn’t close the door behind her.

She tossed herself on the bed, stomach first, and picked up a comic book. The sight of his wife’s retreating back and her simple brush-off made Justin angrier than he’d initially been.

And without much thought, he strolled over to the bed and smacked Darnell across her rear. Months of frustration were evident in that smack, however it only resulted in a feeble sting for Darnell.

She whirled around on her back and glared at him. She asked, “What was that for?” but Justin didn’t specify. Instead, he squeezed onto a small corner of the bed in front of her.

“Are you sick, you’re still in your pajamas?”

“No.”

“Something happened with the kids and time just caught up with you? I’m just speculating here…Is that a no too?”

“Yes.”

“Yes, no or No, no?”

“Yes, no.” Darnell snapped annoyed. She couldn’t stand the sarcastic whiny side of Justin.

“So you just didn’t want to come?”

“I thought about it but then decided not to.” Knowing that Justin would rather not hear about her argument with her mother, particularly the ending, Darnell didn’t bother mentioning it.

Justin momentarily closed his eyes. “Who goes to see a marriage counselor for individual sessions, Dee? I do, obviously. I’m the only one on earth who does that.”

“And do you know how hard it is to convince a therapist that your wife still wants to be married when you’re sitting there by yourself? She basically laughed in my face and told me that you wanted a divorce and I should grant you one.”

Darnell turned to him with her mouth opened wide. “She did not.”

“In so many words she did.” Silence followed Justin’s reply. Shortly, Darnell exhaled a deep breath.

“Well, we never talked about getting a divorce.”

“And we won’t.” Justin quickly added while nudging Darnell over slightly to make space for himself on the full-size bed.

Offended, Darnell propped herself up on her elbows. “So we talked about what you wanted to talk about, allowed you to vent and that’s it? To hell with what I have to say right?

“No. Tell me what happened with Victoria. I heard that she made you cry.”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Darnell scoffed and lied back down. “Therapy session over.” Remaining silent, Justin tossed his arms behind head.

That right there is why they never got anywhere when it came to taking care of problems in their relationship. If it’d hurt too much to talk about it, then they hadn’t. Instead, when Darnell used to go to a room by herself and cry, Justin learned to pretend not to hear it. All feelings and emotions were kept to themselves.

Noticing how quiet Justin had gotten, Darnell turned over so that she was facing him. Due to an old habit, she tucked her head underneath his chin and her arms around his middle. Those two movements alone proved to be the most intimate Darnell had willingly been in months. She surprised the hell out of Justin when she lifted her head and pecked him on the lips.

“Sorry I didn’t go to therapy today. I didn’t deliberately skip today’s session.” No matter what she had led her mother and Darrien to believe.

“You think an apology and a little kiss is going to change the fact that I’m still mad at you?” Justin said all while pulling her closer. He couldn’t help that his body was dying to be near hers after being denied for so long.

“Mmm, it used to.” Her almond-shaped eyes flickered with amusement as she leaned against chest.

“Well that was back when I was young and horny.” Justin mused over how relaxed she seemed to be with him. He was caught off guard but he didn’t question it. He was going to milk it for all he could until whenever.

“…And how long ago was that exactly?” Darnell tossed back and Justin laughed.

“It’s going to take a lot more than a peck especially after all you’ve been putting me through.” He smirked with a wink. Darnell immediately sat up with a suspicious glint in her eyes and then she frowned. The playful and intimate moment was gone.

“Nuh uh.” She was already climbing out of the bed. “I know what you’re thinking.”

“What?” Justin feigned ignorance and grabbed at the tips of her fingers, trying to pull her back to bed.

“No way Justin.”

“C’mon Dee it’ll be just like old times.” He jumped up to stop her at the open door.

“Look, even your bedroom is the same.” He waved his hand around. “You moved all the same stuff in here, this big ass Michael Jordan poster right over your bed that I’ve always been jealous of, the Wonder Woman one over there, and even these same damn Chicago Bulls bed sheets.”

“And your point?” Darnell place her hands on her hips. “I thought I said until I get myself together sex would be cut off for a while.”

“For a while? Dee it has been an eternity!” Justin exploded. “If I say you don’t ever have to go to another therapy session ever again, can we lock ourselves in this room for two days?”

Darnell glared instantly, not at all amused by Justin’s comment. “Is that all you care about? It is, isn’t it?” She slammed the door close and faced her husband. “You want to get me in that bed, put one more baby in me so I won’t be able to go back to school don’t you. You and my mother are plotting against me, aren’t y’all! I can’t believe it!”

Darnell didn’t give a confused Justin the opportunity to respond as she dashed from the bedroom in a fit.

“School? Plotting? What the hell is she talking about?” Justin scratched at his mop of hair and then his growing beard. “ Dee is going crazy and I think she might be seeing the wrong kind of therapist.”