I'm not really sure when I turned into this person. A year ago I was just Emily living day-to-day life. I drove down the same roads everyday, worked in the same office doing the same thing everyday and came home to the same house with the same person inside of it. I lead a very ordinary life, and I liked it that way. Now I'm a maniac. My cell phone is attached to my ear almost 24 hours a day and I'm running back and forth from office to office, state-to-state, house to hospital to different house, it's just utterly insane.

Before when I took time off of work Justin would be there to pick up the slack, and even though there were other people in the company that should be able to run it in the case of both of us being absent we learned the hard way that that wasn't true. So on top of working I've been trying to spend most of my time at the hospital with Justin while also trying to keep everyone in his camp updated on his condition and giving them an ETA on when he's expected to be well enough to get back to work. He's been here for close to a month now, but he's going to be released tomorrow to go to rehab so that he can literally learn how to walk again.

I looked up from my laptop to see his mother packing up his stuff into a duffle bag while he and Trace went over some sketches for the Fall line. He was finally starting to look like Justin again, which was a relief. No longer was his head all wrapped up, now he just had bandages on his face where he needed them. Smiling I got back to work on my computer and completely zoned out until I heard Justin say something to me in the distance. "What?" I asked not looking up.

"Do you ever get off that thing?"

"Every now and then," I replied looking back down that the E-Mail I was typing.

"Shut it off and come sit," he tapped on the seat Trace was just occupying but apparently he and Lynn had left while I was off in another world. I closed the lid to the laptop and stood up feeling my phone buzz in my sweatshirt pocket. I looked at it while I walked over to the chair, "And you can turn that off too..."

"Justin...It's Julie I can't leave her hanging. One quick E-Mail."

"Off...I mean if you like your job that is."

"Fiiiiiiine," I said typing out the E-Mail as fast as possible before hitting the off button. "So Matt leaves for Europe tomorrow, I talked to him earlier and if seems like everything is going as planned."

"I miss you," he said not even responding to my statement.

"I've been here for a week and a half how could you miss me?"

"You may physically be here, but mentally you're somewhere else. Emily Logan is here all the time. Em is...on vacation or something."

"I'm just busy."

"Well can I have Em back for like an hour? No work talk or hospital talk?"

"Okay," I said putting my hands up in defeat, "I'm all yours." The truth was that I wanted to talk to Justin about something other then work and the hospital or rehab, but it was just easier on my heart this way. I knew the minute we started talking like old times I'd start thinking about how much I love him and how it doesn't matter anymore and I'd get upset, but to be honest, I just really didn't have the time or energy to be upset.

"So...How was Trace's birthday party?"

"Don't even get me started. I'm pretty sure I said more then once that I would not be paying for strippers, and what do you know, the minute I walk in I'm greeted by a half naked chick that just came from amateur night."

"I don't know what he see's in her. How much longer do you think it will take for them to break up?"

"It'll be a lot more complicated now if they do," I said rolling my eyes and leaning back on the chair.

"Why?" His eyebrows furrowed making the lines on his forehead more defined.

"He still hasn't told you?" I asked letting out a disgusted laugh. He looked at me like I had seven heads and took that as a no. "Trace has managed to impregnate Two Faced Whore Barbie."

"WHAT?! When...How...Is the kid even his?"

"Apparently, but I can't say I'd be surprised if the kid came out looking like the milk mans baby."

"I can't believe he hasn't told me," he said attempting to sit up further on the pillow but struggling. I stood up and helped him so that the pillows were now on his lower back instead of in the middle. "When did he spill the beans to you?"

I sat back down with a sigh debating on whether I should tell him the truth or just make up another day. When I looked up at him he was staring at me waiting in anticipation and I decided that now was as good a time as any to talk about the aftermath of my answer. "They actually told me the day we broke up so.... that added insult to injury...."

"Oh," he said bringing his good arm up to scratch the back of his now shaved head, "I ummm...I was actually hoping maybe we could talk about that."

"We really don't have to Justin," I said looking down at the floor instantly regretting my decision to tell him the truth.

"Emily look at me," he replied after a few seconds of silence. I forced my eyes to look up into his and got lost in his baby blues like I always did. "I really want to."

"There really isn't anything to say."

"I think there's a lot to say..."

"Justin I just don't--"

"Oh thank God you're here!" I spun my head around to see Robin standing at the door with a wheel chair in front of her and pain written across her face. "Come on help me get him in here."

"What's the matter?" I asked not knowing what was going on but immediately helping Justin scoot over to the side of the bed.

"It's Chloe..."

Everyone stopped moving for a second, frozen in place with chills running down everyone's spine. I looked up at Justin's face and saw a pool of tears forming in his eyes. "But she's seven," I said not taking my eyes off Justin's.

"We should really go," Robin replied helping me get Justin in the wheelchair. We walked for what seemed like days until we reached room 521. Robin went in first and I pushed Justin close behind her, "Chloe, Justin and Emily are here to see you," she said with enthusiasm. Chloe turned her head on the pillow to look at us but didn't say anything. I pushed Justin closer to her bed and watched him pick up her little hand and place it in his one good hand.

Robin started walking out and I followed close behind her giving them a minute alone in hopes to get some questions answered. "What about her mother?" I whispered just as we hit the door.

"She left about an hour ago to go pick up her mother in Nevada to bring her back here. We thought she had more time..."

"So this...This is it?"

She threw her clipboard on the nurse's station looking down at her hands. "All of her organs are slowly shutting down. It's just a matter of time now." 

"This is just...not good."

"You should go back in there," she said walking away.

"Are you okay?"

"I usually don't get like this but...I'll be fine."

I turned around after a minute and walked back into the room, pulling up a chair next to Justin. Chloe's eyes were closed and he was singing "Part of Your World" softly from The Little Mermaid. His hand was on the top of her head and every now and then he'd run his hand over it like she still had her long brown curls sitting on top of it. Tears were falling down his cheeks and it took a lot of effort on his part to finish the song. I picked my hand up putting it over hers and watched her eyes flutter open when the song ended. I linked my pinky with Justin's that was sticking out from under his cast and he squeezed it as hard as he could.

"Justin?" She said softly straining her voice to be audible.

"Yeah?" He responded a few seconds later after he composed himself enough to speak.

"When you and Emily get married can I come?"

My mouth hit the floor and his head turned so fast to look at me I thought it was about to spin totally around. I shook my head answering the silent question he was asking me. Did I tell her we were getting married? Did I tell her we broke up? The answer was no to both. "Chloe, Emily and I aren't--"

"Of course you can Chlo," I interrupted him refusing to let him crush a dying girls dreams.

"Cool!" She turned her head to the side away from us facing the window. The sun was going down and the trees outside were swaying due to the high winds we've been having. There were tears streaming down Justin's face again and I could feel my eyes welling up. What could she be thinking about right now? Does she know that she's going to die and her mother won't even be here when it happens? "Will you sing the song?" she asked, keeping her eyes away from us, "The one you always sing before you leave?"

He shook his head leaning back away from her bed and put his hand over his face letting out a soft sob. I put one hand on his leg and the other in Chloe's. I pushed my seat closer to him and felt his head go down on my shoulder. Leaning down I placed a soft kiss on the top of his head and whispered in his ear, "Sing her the song, you can do it." When he picked his head up off my shoulder I focused my attention on the seven year old in the bed in front of us, about to die. "Which song do you want him to sing?"

"The sunshine one," she said after a few minutes of thinking. Her head bobbed back over to our side but her eyes were closed, "I really like the sunshine one."

I don't know how I was staying composed, but something in my body turned on that told me I had to be the strong one. I looked at Justin who was still wiping away tears then back down at Chloe who was taking shorter and shorter breathes longer and longer apart. "We love you Chlo," I whispered placing a kiss on her cheek. When I sat back down I turned to look behind me and saw Robin at the door holding a tissue in her hand, crying. I squeezed his hand and after taking a few deep breaths he started singing.

"You are my sunshine...my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey." Tears started to fall down my face because I knew it was the end. It's just like you see on TV and in the movies when the monitors start beeping really fast and the person that's dying just kind of stares at you until it's over. I was squeezing her hand and she was staring at Justin while attempting to squeeze my hand back. As the beeping got faster I felt someone come into the room and soon it stopped all together. Looking to my right I saw Robin unplugging the machine and Justin found it in himself to keep going. "You'll never know dear, how much I love you..." Her grip on my hand got looser and her eyes started to close. Justin closed his eyes and when he re-opened them he was staring at me with his mouth open and together we sang the last line, "Please don't take my sunshine away." And with that she no longer held onto my hand, and her eyes were completely closed. I looked up at Robin and she just nodded as tears slid down her cheeks.

Justin's head slammed down on the bed and he began to cry so hard that it was hard for him to breathe. Chloe was gone. A seven year old that less then 6 months ago had more life to her then anyone I'd ever seen before, now had no life left in her. How could this be happening? I was rubbing his back when Robin leaned down to hug him before telling us we had to leave in 5 minutes. He sat up and watched her leave then turned to me with so much sadness on her face that it made me want to go inside of his body and pull it all out. I've never seen him look like this before and it was tearing me apart inside even more then I already was. "I know," was all I could say before wrapping my arms around his neck and holding him until a nurse came to kick us out. I couldn't look at her before we left, I wanted to remember her alive and happy, but Justin picked up her hand and spoke to her for a minute before wheeling himself out to the nurses station where I was standing staring off into space just like Robin was. When I saw him out of the corner of my eye I pushed myself off of the desk where I was leaning on my elbows, "You okay?"

"I don't think that's the word I'd use but..."

Just then I heard the elevator ding loudly behind me, and I turned around to see Chloe's mom Cheryl running towards the desk. About half way over she realized the look on all of our faces and I saw her whole body shut down even though she continued to run. She looked at Robin pleading with her not to say her daughter was dead, and when she shook her head she threw herself onto me wrapping her arms around my neck and cried on my shoulder. I wasn't sure why I was the chosen one but I held onto her for dear life rubbing her back and running my hand through her hair to try and soothe her as much as I could. In time she backed away, her cheeks were beat red and her eyes were puffy and wet. "Were you with her?" she asked struggling to get the words out.

"We were with her," I said holding her hand in mine looking at her in the eye hoping it would give her some strength. "Justin was singing to her, and I was holding her hand."

"She loved you guys...so much."

"We loved her too."

"Thank you," she said giving me another hug before leaning over to hug Justin, "You don't know how much it means to me to know that she wasn't alone."

"Your welcome," we both said at the same time, and with that she asked Robin to see her daughter one last time and Justin and I made our way back to the elevators in silence. He got back into bed and stared at the ceiling for a good hour while I stared at the wall, ignoring my cell phone that magically got turned on and wouldn't stop ringing. He finally looked over at me and put his hand out for me to take.

"I love you Em." It rolled off his tongue like he's been saying it everyday for the past 20 years.

"I love you too Justin."