JC was all but convinced that Addison was standing him up. He'd been waiting an hour and hadn't heard from Addison since her "traffic's a bitch; I'm gonna be late" text 30 minutes before that. Had she changed her mind?

"Of course she did," JC muttered under his breath as he finished his second glass of wine and plopped the glass on the kitchen island. Why had he expected for her to come to dinner anyway? It's not like she owed him anything. Beyond disappointed, JC headed to the oven to turn it off of warmer mode and take out the lasagna he'd slaved over for an hour. As he got ready to cut himself a piece, the doorbell rang.

"Josh! Open up! It's me!"

Shit.

JC froze, the knife in midair. For a few seconds, he didn't know what to do next - the doorbell had caught him completely off-guard. When it rang again, accompanied by several short knocks on the door, JC jumped and brought himself back to reality. He set the knife down and hurried to the door, tugging at the bottom of the white long-sleeved thermal he'd thrown on over a pair of dark-wash jeans. As he wiped his sweaty palms on his jeans and reached for the doorknob, he prayed to the stars above that he wouldn't fuck this up.

"You thought I'd stood you up, didn't you?" JC laughed and shrugged, indicating he'd been busted.  "I'm so sorry Josh. Traffic was terrible. I tried to get here as fast as I could." He shook his head and smiled, stepping aside so she could step in.

 "It's OK. I actually just took the lasagna out of the oven. Hope you're hungry." Yes, he had fibbed just a little bit, but he didn't want Addison thinking he'd really given up on her showing up. He gave her an appreciative once over as she tossed her purse on the couch and slipped out of her heels. She had on an orange skirt and white graphic tee with random accessories, but JC only noticed how hot she looked. Her hair was curled and pulled back in a messy ponytail, a look JC loved. He inhaled deeply, forcing himself to keep his thoughts chaste before he got into trouble. 

"It smells amazing Josh. I'm absolutely starving." Grinning, he showed her to the kitchen and helped her sit at the kitchen island before grabbing her a glass of wine. "Huh. Moscato, huh? Heather must've told you this is my version of crack." JC laughed and nodded as he finally cut into the lasagna.

"She did. It's a little sweet for my liking, but it's still good. I've got red and white in the chiller, too, if you want something else with the lasagna." JC cut two helpings and slid them on plates, walking them over to Addison and setting her plate in front of her. He sat down as she took a bite and moaned in appreciation.

"You are an amazing cook. Wow. This is GOOD." JC nodded his thanks as he took his first bite, surprised at how good it had turned out. He'd attempted lasagna a handful of times, and it had been awhile since he'd made it. He got two more bites in before Addison cleared her throat and set her fork down.

"Everything OK?" JC asked, setting his own fork down and turning to face her.

"Oh yeah - it's fine. But this isn't the way I had envisioned our date starting - me waltzing in an hour late and jumping straight to dinner. So...let's start over. Hi." JC laughed, his racing heart slowing down. He was absolutely expecting the worse to happen during this entire date, so he thought she was going to say something about leaving, not starting things over.

"Hi. You look great."

Addison blushed and nodded her thanks. "So do you. Your baby blues really pop. I love it." The two of them stared at each other in silence for a few seconds, the sexual tension sizzling between them. Before JC could counter and say something completely stupid, he turned back to his lasagna and picked up his fork.

"I uh...I have salad in the fridge. And a cheese platter, too." Addison shook her head as she took her fork back and started eating again. 

"This is great. I'm fine with this. I didn't think it was possible, but you've become a better cook since the last time I had your food. I'm glad you invited me in instead of going out." JC smiled as he took another forkful of lasagna, trying to calm his nerves. Why was this so weird? It had been so natural when they'd dated the first time...this was just awkward.

The duo ate in silence for what felt like eons, but was probably only a few minutes, the only sound being the scraping of forks and the sips of wine. Addison wouldn't even look at him, which made the whole situation even more awkward.

Deciding the ice needed to be broken, JC took a long gulp of moscato and cleared his throat. "So. How was your flight back?" Addison shrugged as she chewed.

"It was OK. Nothing eventful. Was hard to leave Grace and her mom, but they need their time to grieve and heal."

"And how are you doing?" JC almost regretted asking the question as he watched Addison set her fork down and heard her sniffle.

 "I uh...it's hard. Still a little hard to believe I won't ever see him again. It's tough." JC sat in silence as Addison wiped some tears away and took another sip of wine. "I know I told you already, but thank you for coming out there. It did more good than you'll ever know." JC cautiously put his hand on Addison's shoulder and rubbed it gently as she began to cry softly, using the napkin JC had set out with their place settings to wipe away the tears. She leaned against him and rested her head on his shoulder, JC pulling her chair closer to make her more comfortable.

"I honestly can't imagine what you're going through Ads, but I'm here for you. It was only logical that I go out there and be there for you."

"But why? You and I aren't dating. We're still getting reacquainted with one another after so long. Why go through all that for me?"

"Because I care about you," JC responded without thinking twice. "You are special to me. You've always been special to me. And now that I get this chance to get to know you again, be a part of your life, I want to be there for you. We have a history, one that isn't easily forgotten. I wasn't about to let you suffer on your own." Addison didn't answer but simply nodded her understanding, still sniffling.

"Well, I appreciate it. Thanks." He felt Addison plant a gentle kiss on his cheek before pulling away, making JC's face burn. He fought to control the urge to kiss her back as Addison went back to eating her dinner. "So when do you go back to ABDC?"

Glad for a subject change, JC took a sip of wine before answering. "Tomorrow. We've got a taping tomorrow evening. You should come to one some time. I can get you tickets." Addison grinned as she chewed.

"That would be amazing. I love that show. Been watching since the first season." JC looked over and raised an eyebrow at her.

"Seriously? You've been watching?"

"Of course! Contrary to popular belief, I didn't tune you all the way out during the last decade. You always have something insightful to say, and the dancing is fun to watch. You're a good judge."

Floored, JC wasn't quite sure what to say. "I'm surprised you didn't throw something at the TV every time you saw me," he mumbled through a bite of lasagna. He heard Addison snort beside him, causing him to turn his head to look at her. 

"Geez Jace. I know that the way you and I ended wasn't ideal, but I still cared about you. We were friends first."

"Well, you should've said that ten years ago when you took off from the tour and didn't tell anyone where you were going." Well. THAT came out of nowhere, JC thought to himself. He hadn't meant for that to come out so snarky - or at all - but he couldn't take it back now. Maybe drinking that third glass of wine had been a bad idea. He saw Addison clench her jaw out of the corner of his eye, and he braced himself for her wrath.

"You broke up with me Jace. I didn't have to tell you a damn thing. Everyone else knew but you, and that was the way it should've been. You stopped caring about me, so you kicked me to the curb and found someone else a couple of weeks later. So don't even go there, because you do not want to feel the wrath I've built up against you the last ten years." He kept his head down as Addison slammed her fork on the table and stood up quickly, nearly knocking her chair over. He fully expected her to storm out of his house - and maybe out of his life - but instead, she headed to the kitchen and started loudly rummaging through his cabinets. It only took seconds for him to realize her intention.

She was going to make cupcakes.
---
"Addison. What in the hell...?" Addison shook her head, opening every cabinet to find ingredients. JC always had a stocked kitchen, so she knew he had everything she'd need. She just had to figure out where everything was - and she needed to do it while keeping her mouth shut, before she really laid into JC.

 "Oh, you know me - I tend to bake when I get pissed off. That's what I'm doing now. I can't get back to my own kitchen fast enough, so your kitchen will have to do." Without waiting for a response, she continued to rummage around until she had ingredients, measuring cups, bowls and his KitchenAid mixer all lined up. She'd even found muffin pans and cupcake liners - it was almost like he was expecting her to waltz into his kitchen and make cupcakes.

She didn't bother to look in JC's general direction as she turned on the oven and laid out all of the ingredients. She let her natural baker side take over as she began measuring the dry ingredients and tossing them into a large bowl she'd found in a nearby cabinet. She made herself focus on the baking to get her anger back under control, before she exploded and ended any chance of the two of them resolving whatever the hell was going on between them.

How dare this son of a bitch tell me it wasn't OK to walk out, Addison huffed to herself. The man started dating Bobbi not long after he dumped me! How am I supposed to bounce back from that?!

"Did you cheat on me with Bobbi? Is that why you dumped me?" Addison hoped JC could hear the spite, the anger, the sourness in her voice as she continued to measure and mix ingredients for her peanut butter cupcakes.

"Dude. NO. It wasn't like that, at all. Come on Addison - what would make you think that?!" She was a little surprised that JC had the balls to sound shocked by her accusation.

"Oh, I don't know...maybe the fact that pictures of the two of you making out backstage got out less than a month after you left me. Or that you were calling her your girlfriend less than two months after we were done. That's an awful fast time to turn around and have a relationship that wound up lasting for years, don't you think?" She managed a quick look up at JC, who was stone-faced and staring at his nearly-empty plate. 

She rolled her eyes and shook her head, quieting down again to focus on the batter. On the inside, she was stewing. She had so many things she wanted to say to him - much of it hurtful - but she had to keep it in check. She had spent months being consumed by bitterness and anger, and she didn't want that to happen again. 

The kitchen remained dead silent, except for the random noises Addison created by baking - the mixer combining all the ingredients together with a fast whirr, the spatula scraping the sides of the bowl, the loud clink of the muffin pan on the counter as Addison prepared it for the batter. She could feel JC watching her, but she didn't dare look up again; she just kept her had down and worked. When the oven was ready, she gently slid the filled pan into the oven, closed the door and went about cleaning up her mess. All of that took a good 30 minutes, from what Addison could tell, and now she was more than ready to go home. 

As Addison finished wiping down the counters and set her mind on leaving, she heard JC clear his throat. "You know, you mattered to me back then. Still do now." Addison threw her rag on the counter and put her hands on her hips, glaring in JC's direction.

"Bullshit Josh. Come on now. Again, your actions spoke louder than your words, and you were loud and clear about how you felt when you dumped me and moved on." Shaking his head, JC pushed his plate away and stood up.

"Come on. I have to show you something." Before she could tell him that he could shove whatever he had to show her up his ass, he walked out of the area and down the hallway that led to the other rooms of the house. Now curious as to where he was going, Addison huffed and followed JC's retreating figure. When she reached the room he had walked into, she stopped dead in her tracks.

Addison could do nothing more than stand at the threshold, staring. Was JC really letting her into his recording room? Heather had always said that JC's recording space was sacred and not meant for non-music folk. She took a look around the room, in awe of the space. The room was bigger than she thought it would be, with a sizeable recording both and giant soundboard that had an infinite number of knobs, buttons and other gadgets. The room was serene, with tan walls and dark brown paneling that Addison assumed helped with noise control, along with dark brown throw rugs and some furniture against the wall opposite the recording booth. The lighting was adjusted so the room had almost a seductive feel to it - dim and low in the middle, but the spotlights lining the wall highlighted the various accolades JC had received as a member of *N Sync and solo artist. She couldn't help but smile as she quickly scanned the platinum records, trophies, first presses...she remembered JC getting most of those like it was yesterday. All of the anger she had melted away as she took in the room.

"Why are you still standing there?" Addison could hear the confusion - and amusement - in JC's voice as it broke through her trip down memory lane.

"Am I even allowed in here? Heather told me this space is sacred. I'm not about to break the sacred." JC just laughed.

"Of course you can come in. I have something to show you." Addison took one cautious step, then another cautious step, into the room as JC turned towards the back wall. She squinted to get a better view of what JC was headed towards, then walked quickly across the room to stand by JC. She heard him chuckle as she scanned the wall, her jaw dropping.

"Holy crap Josh. All of these are yours?! You must have doubled your record collection since the last time I saw you!" She looked at the dozen storage cubes full of records, realizing quickly that they were grouped by genres.

"I collected all the albums I could, including the ones that we did as a group, Justin did solo and I did solo. There's actually one I want to give to you..." Addison raised an eyebrow at JC as he stepped up to one of the cubes and carefully removed one of the albums. He handed it to her quietly, nervously. "There's something inside there, too," he added as Addison took it and turned it around in her hands. "This was the first one off the press. I swore that if I ever saw you again, I would give this to you, no matter what places we were in in our lives."

"Josh..." She tried to hold back tears of sadness as she continued to stare at JC's first solo album. "I don't know what to say."

"Just look inside it please. This is killing me." Addison laughed a little as she slid her hand inside the record holder, careful not to bend it. She felt a card and slid it out, opening it silently. JC's familiar scrawl made her smile as she read the words:

This album is because of you. I will be forever grateful that you came into my life, even if you didn't stay. You will never know how much you mean to me. Love always, Josh

Addison pretended to read the note a couple of more times so that she could gather her thoughts. Her heart had started to race as she'd read the note, not quite sure what to think or how to react.

JC cleared his throat nervously as he shoved his hands in his pockets, causing a teary-eyed Addison to look up at him, still clutching the note. "I saved this as soon as it came off the press. I wanted you to know how much your support meant to me for all of those years, how this album was inspired by - and because of - you. So...thanks. And, this is sorta kinda proof that I really did care about you, even if you didn't know it." Addison kept looking at JC, still not sure how to handle what he'd just told her.

At that moment, Addison knew that she was too far into this to back out - that she had feelings for JC that she wouldn't be able to deny, even through the anger and resentment. She had definitely fallen for him again, and the record was the icing on the cake for her. Instead of using words, she decided to use actions. She dropped the record on the floor, planted her hands on either side of JC's face and pulled him in for a kiss. Addison felt his body go rigid, and he didn't make a move to kiss her back, so she pulled away quickly. Her heart dropped to her feet, the rejection stinging more than it should've.

"I uh...I'm sorry..." she stammered as JC stared at her, wide-eyed. "I didn't think...I wasn't..." As Addison tried to stammer out an excuse, JC suddenly pulled her back to him by her hips and crashed his lips to hers. It only took a second for Addison to wrap her arms around JC's neck and pull him closer to her, falling deeply into the kiss that she'd been waiting on for ten years. She felt JC's fingers dig into her hips as their tongues began to tangle seductively, JC's low groan setting Addison's blood on fire. 

Just as JC's hand started to slide up her shirt, Addison came back to reality and pulled away quickly, shaking her head to clear it. Her whole body burned with desire for this man, but she just couldn't do it. She wouldn't let herself get caught up like this again.

"God Josh - this is exactly how we started the last time. We got caught up. I can't do that again." JC looked just as disheveled as she felt, which made it even harder for her to pull away.

"You're right," he responded, nodding his head quickly. "I uh...I guess we should go check on those cupcakes now." Addison could hear the huskiness in his voice that she had jokingly called his bedroom voice once upon a time, and it always led to them ripping each other's clothes off. Always. To get away from the temptation as fast as possible, Addison made quick work of picking up her record from the eggshell-colored carpet, turning on her heels and leaving the room. She didn't breathe again until she got to the kitchen, relieved that JC hadn't immediately followed her. That gave her a few seconds to straighten her outfit and catch her breath.

"That was almost too easy," she muttered under her breath as she started checking the cupcakes to make sure they'd cooled down. "I'm so fucked."
---
As Addison left the room - more like ran from the room - JC couldn't do anything but watch her go. His heart was still racing, his blood was still flowing south, and he was still wasn't quite sure what had just happened. He had meant to give her the record, call it even and go eat cupcakes, not fall into the hottest kiss he'd had since they'd broken up. 

"Wow..." he whispered, absently rubbing his lips that were still searing from the kiss. JC had no idea what would've happened if they hadn't stopped kissing, but he had a pretty good idea where things were headed - and he didn't mind one bit. He was surprised at how quickly things had escalated between them, which only meant one thing.

He was totally fucked.

How could he remain friends with her without wanting to be with her - both physically and emotionally? How could they come back from that kiss and keep it platonic? There was no way in hell JC could keep that charade up. He huffed in frustration and rubbed his face roughly with his hands, not quite sure what to do next. Resisting the urge to hide out in the room until Addison decided to leave, he took a few extra seconds to calm his hormones before making his way to the kitchen.

He stood quietly at the main entrance to the kitchen, not wanting to disturb Addison's flow. She was such a natural when it came to baking, no matter what kitchen she was in. The delicious smell of peanut butter and melted chocolate was wafting through the air, making JC's mouth water. Addison was bent over a batch of cooling peanut butter cupcakes, dipping the cupcakes into a pot of the melted chocolate. He couldn't stop staring at her ass, couldn't get over how sexy she was, couldn't get over how much he'd missed her in his kitchen. It just felt natural to have her there, just like it had that fateful summer that had brought them as close as they'd ever been. JC longed for that. JC wanted that.

And, at that moment, JC decided he was going to get it.

"I think I loved you back then." He blurted it out without thinking, and he tried hard not to show his regret over those seven words as Addison's head whipped away from her cupcakes.

"Uh...come again?"