July 14th 2006      11:03 PM

"The surgery was supposed to be over an hour ago," JC muttered, checking his watch for the fifth time in forty-five seconds. "Why hasn't anyone come out to talk to me yet? I'm her husband dammit! Did they forget that I was waiting out here or something?"

"Calm down JC," Justin advised his friend."Maybe they're just waiting for the anesthesia to wear off so that she'll be conscious by the time they come out to talk to you."

"You think?"

"Just stop panicking. I'm sure everything's fine."

"Hey uh, thanks for being here with me Justin," JC nodded at his friend. "It means a lot... I know how busy you are sometimes..."

"Don't sweat it. I mean, if a hot nurse were to walk by holding a needle, I mean, you'd probably pass out and then I'd be here to catch you so it'll make me look like this great, strong best friend and she'll be impressed. Simple. It works out for everyone."

"I feel like I'm about to throw up," JC muttered, resting his forehead in his hands. "The anxiety is killing me. I mean it's my WIFE in there."

"I'm here for ya C," Justin patted his back.

"I can't wait to see her," he smiled softly. "Run my hands through her hair, kiss her lips, put my arms around her and take her home in a few weeks."

Justin chuckled as JC went on.

"You want to hear something?"

"Sure,"

JC grinned. "We're going to have another baby soon."

Justin's jaw fell open. "She's pregnant?"

"No, not yet. As soon as she gets better, we're going to start trying. Man, I can't wait till then. I'm just unbelievably thankful for the way things have taken a turn for the better."

"I'm happy for you guys Jace. Congrats,"

"Thanks," JC nodded. "I wonder if Ian's still awake."

"With Chris, Lance and Joey as your babysitters, I'm sure he's either wide awake or he's fallen into a deep sleep after burning out all his energy playing with Chris."

"Probably," JC chuckled.

They spent the next couple minutes in silence. JC just staring at the wall and Justin kept himself occupied with a basketball game that was showing on the TV inside the waiting room they sat in. After the game headed to commercial, he turned to his left just in time to see a doctor in scrubs walk out of the double doors he could spot from where he was seated.

"Hey, C," Justin nudged JC's arm.

"What?"

"That doctor there is coming into this waiting room,"

JC turned his head to where Justin was looking and got up from his chair immediately. "Dr. Roberts," JC said, and Justin stood up as well.

"Hello Mr. Chasez," he acknowledged JC's presence as well as Justin's.

"Hello," Justin nodded, shaking the man's hand. He looked pale and tired and his eyes reflected grief of some sort.

"How'd the transplant go?" JC asked. "Is she conscious? When can I go in and see her?"

"Mr. Chasez, I'd like you to sit down please."

JC frowned, but did as the doctor directed. Out of respect, Justin kept quiet and sat down next to JC, whose back was to him.

"How is she?" JC asked.

Dr. Roberts sighed softly, looking at JC. He rubbed his forehead and winced. Clearing his throat, he was able to look JC in the eye. "Mr. Chasez, it is apparent that the transplant was unsuccessful."

"What do you mean by ‘unsuccessful'?"

"Jessica had an anaphylactic reaction to the foreign tissues we had to place in her body and there were complications in midst of that. Unfortunately, while we were in the operating room, one of her arteries were accidently nicked in a way that it shouldn't. She ended up losing too much blood."

"What the hell does that mean?" JC gritted out.

The doctor cleared his throat once more before standing up and rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm deeply sorry Mr. Chasez."

Justin gasped and JC spun around to look at him.

"What?"

"J-Jace..." Justin just shook his head.

"What are you sorry for?" he glared at the doctor. "Where is she?!"

"I'm afraid Jessica didn't make it out of surgery Mr. Chasez,"

"That's impossible," JC shook his head. "No, no, no, no don't mess with me when it's about my wife. She... She... She..."

"She's gone Mr. Chasez. We couldn't stop the bleeding."

"You killed her?"

"No, Mr. Chasez, we didn't..." He sighed. "I know this may be hard for you to take-"

"Fuck!" JC spat, shoving the doctor aside and running toward the double doors. Justin followed.

"JC, stop!"

But he kept going. "I need to see her!"

"JC you can't! Stop! JC!"

--"JC!"

"What?"

Justin rolled his eyes. "Dude, the light's green. Drive up already."

"Oh, right. Thanks."

"Are you alright C?"

"You okay, daddy?" Ian asked from the backseat where he sat between Lance and Joey.

JC smiled, glancing at him through the rearview mirror. "Daddy's fine, don't worry."

"What're you guys doing after the ceremony?" Lance asked.

"Well Ian and I were just going to go home and hang out by the pool. Watch some cartoons, eat a lot of ice cream... Right bud?"

"Yea!" the child cheered.

"Mind if we impose?" Justin asked.

JC raised his eyebrows. "You want to stay?"

"Sure," he nodded.

"It'll be a guy day," Joey added in.

"Alright,"

** ** ** **

2 hours later

"Ah, you're a big boy now!" JC grinned, enveloping his son in a hug. "You're not in preschool anymore,"

"High five little dude," Chris smiled.

"To be a parent," JC smiled, looking down at the certificate in his hand.

"It's only preschool C," Lance chuckled.

JC rolled his eyes. "Yea but, even things like this... You can't help but feel proud of it. It's hard to explain."

"Hey, who's the chick Ian's talking to over there?" Joey asked.

JC looked to where he was staring. He chuckled. "That's his, well, that was his teacher."

"Damn," Justin muttered. "Since when do PREschool teachers look like THAT?"

JC shook his head, walking away and toward his son to greet the woman.

"Susanne, hi," he smiled.

"Mr. Chasez, hi," she went up and hugged him, to JC's surprise. It took him a moment or two to actually hug back. "How're you doing?"

JC sighed, maintaining his smile for his son's sake. "I'm doing alright, thanks."

"Hard, huh?"

He nodded. "Harder than I thought but... I can't complain."

"Well it has been a pleasure teaching Ian and if there's anything he ever needs help with, you know you can always pass by or let me know." She continued. "The same goes for you. If there's anything you ever need, just call. I'd be more than happy to do what I can."

"I appreciate the offer, so thank you."

"You wanna come over to our house Ms. Granger?" Ian smiled up at the two adults.

The woman laughed, blushing slightly and JC couldn't help but feel a little awkward.

"Uh," he started.

"That's very sweet Ian but I'm actually a little busy today. Maybe another time, alright?"

"Okay," he said simply, taking JC's hand and holding on to it.

"Sorry about that," JC apologized softly. "I guess he just misses the female presence around the house."

"Don't worry about it," she waved her hand.

"Alright uh, I guess we better get going. Thank you, for everything you've done with and for him over the past couple years. He's really going to miss you."

"I'm going to miss him too and thank you. You're doing a great job with him, considering the circumstances."

"Thank you for that," JC nodded.

"Let's go home now," Ian shook JC's hand. "Please,"

"Alright, let's go." His father smiled.

"Uh, I guess we'll see you around the area. Best of luck with your new classes."

"Thanks." She smiled. "Hey uh, JC?"

"What?"

"Do you think you and I could maybe... you know... whenever you're ready... go out for a drink, perhaps?"

"Uh," JC rubbed the back of his neck and thought about it. The ring on his finger on his left hand caught his eye. "I'm sorry, it's just... It's not you and I think you're great but..." He sighed.

"Too soon?"

"Yes."

"No problem then."

"You're a wonderful woman, I'm sure, but I don't think I'm in the right mind set to get back into the whole dating scene just yet. It's all still a blur to me."

"Daddy," Ian whined quietly.

"Okay, okay, we're going."

"Well then, I'll see you around Mr. Chasez."

"You may as well call me JC, it's not a problem," he shook her hand.

"Bye JC," she nodded with a smile.

Turning around, he retreated back to where his four ex band mates where chatting.

"We saw you talking to the teacher," Justin winked. "What happened there?"

"We just talked... Mostly about Ian," JC shrugged.

"She's pretty," Ian beamed.

"She's more than pretty, I'll tell you that," Chris mumbled. "I'd like to rip her-"

"Chris!" JC glared at him nodding his head casually toward Ian. "She's pretty. Leave it at that."

"So, back to your place?" Lance asked.

"To my place we go."

"You should have invited her." Justin told him as Ian trotted alongside Joey and Lance, Chris following closely behind. "She's cute."

"Nah,"

"You don't think she's cute?"

"No, she's attractive and all, but I wasn't going to invite her over."

"Why not?"

"I'm not ready for that whole thing yet Justin. I can't put myself out there again. I just don't feel it. And I know that I'm never going to feel what I felt for Jess with anyone else so I'm basically just going to be wasting my time and her time. I don't need dating. I just can't do it. It's too soon for me."

"Even if though Jess passed away over a year ago?"

"It could be ten years ago and I still don't think I'd be ready."

"What'd you going to do about sex then?" Justin asked, confusion in his voice.

"That part, I haven't figured out yet."

"What if you're never ready JC? You can't wait for the right time to put yourself back out there. Just do it."

"I just don't want to."