Spare me your judgements and spare me your dreams

Cause recently mine have been tearing my seams

I sit alone in this winter clarity which clouds my mind

Alone in the wind and the rain you left me

It's getting dark darling, too dark to see

And I'm on my knees, and your faith in shreds, it seems

Corrupted by the simple sniff of riches blown

I know you have felt much more love than you've shown

And I'm on my knees and the water creeps to my chest

The train that must have run her over was still pounding through her head, or so Shelby felt.  The taste in her mouth rivaled any she’d ever had, and she was sure she’d done some incredibly stupid things.  Unfortunately, this wasn’t the first time she’d woken up feeling that way, which is why she wasn’t surprised when she had no idea where she was.

“Oh, fuck me.”  She pulled a pillow over her head, rolling under the soft comforter and hoping to sink into the mattress.  Why did she keep doing this to herself?  Carefully, she peeked above the covers again, taking in her surroundings more thoroughly.  Obviously she wasn’t in a hotel.  It was too nicely decorated and comfortable to be a hotel.  That meant she went home with someone last night. 

She lifted the comforter, peering at her body clad a large t-shirt that must belong to a man.

“Shit.”  She flopped back against the pillows and then immediately regretted the action.  Her head was pounding and she needed to get something to drink.  Carefully, she stepped from the bed and peeked behind an adjacent door, happy to find a bathroom.  On the counter was a toothbrush still in the plastic, a bottle of water, and a package of aspirin.  Obviously someone was looking out for her.  She also spotted a pile of clothing that looked like it would fit her; sweatpants and a t-shirt.  Gratefully, she stripped herself of her clothing and started the shower.  The water was exactly what she needed to shake off the last of her grogginess, although it made the pounding of her head more pronounced.  That was okay, though, because her memory was coming back in bits and pieces and it didn’t seem too bad.

She knew she’d fought with her father, which wasn’t a surprise.  What was slightly shocking was knowing she’d made friends with Justin Timberlake and he’d witnessed her breakdown.  She was hoping that the hospitality she was appreciating was also Justin’s, because that made the most sense.  It was embarrassing, but she could handle that.  She would be heading back to New York in a couple of days, which meant she could make her apologies, be on her way, and never have to face the man again.

After her shower, Shebly felt a little more human, and she was ready to venture out of the bedroom.  Her stomach rumbled loudly, causing Shelby to grimace.  She left the t-shirt and her heels on the bed, not sure what to do with them, and headed down the hallway toward the stairs. 

“She lives.”

The voice startled her, causing her to jump and turn at the top of the stairs.  Justin was behind her, emerging from another room.  "You scared me,” she confessed.

His grin was sheepish.  “Sorry.  I was just coming up to check on you.  How are you feeling?”  His eyes studied her, and suddenly Shelby felt exposed.  She crossed her arms over her chest.

“Like I made an ass of myself and got stupidly drunk last night.” 

Justin chuckled, passing Shelby and heading down the stairs.  He paused, turning to give her a questioning look.  “Are you coming?  I’ll make you breakfast.”

Her stomach grumbled again, propelling Shelby down the carpeted steps.  She glanced around the beautiful house, taking in the art work and trinkets that littered the shelves and walls.  This house was definitely lived in.  The kitchen was huge, but it didn’t surprise her in the least.  She didn’t take Justin as the type of guy to do anything half-way.

“So, I know when I’m hung over the best cure is grease and carbs.  French toast and bacon sound good to you?”  The ingredients were already on the counter, the skillet perched on the stove top.

Shelby nodded.  “Sounds like heaven.”  Before she could ask, a cup of coffee was placed in front of her, steaming and fragrant.  She sighed appreciatively.  “If I’d known I was going to get pampered like this, I would’ve gotten drunk with you a long time ago, Timberlake.”  Justin’s shoulder’s stiffened slightly, but he didn’t say anything.  Shelby kicked herself.  “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”  His back was to her, hands deftly flipping pieces of French toast and moving around strips of bacon.  The question, seemingly innocent, felt immensely loaded.

“For making a horrible first impression and dragging you into this mess between me and my father.  For almost puking in your car.  For taking advantage of your gentleman-ness instead of leaving with my tail tucked between my legs like I should.”  She was surprised by her own honesty, but something about Justin had her wanting to stop hiding.  He looked like a safe place to start.

The tension in Justin’s shoulders shifted, but Shelby still couldn’t see his face.  She had no idea what he was thinking, and it bothered her.  “I swear I’m not psychotic, Justin.  Last night…” she sighed, “last night was the culmination of the past few weeks erupting.  You weren’t supposed to witness it, and I sure as hell never intended to involve you.  I just…he drives me up the wall on a good day, and with my mother gone…” she choked on her words, unable to finish the sentence.

Justin slid a plate of food in front of her, setting a container of syrup next to it.  “You don’t have to explain yourself to me, Shelby.”

She shook her head, adamant, “Yes, I do, because I can only imagine the horrible thoughts you’re thinking about me and it’s not like that.”  Her brown eyes crashed into his blue ones, imploring him to understand her.  He blinked and looked away. 

“Would you like some juice?”  He was pouring some orange juice into a glass, not really listening to her answer.

“No, thank you.”

Silence stretched between them, awkward and confused.  The smell of the bacon was too much, though, and Shelby ignored her need to explain and started to eat.  She devoured the food, unconcerned with how savage and disgusting she must look shoveling toast into her mouth.  “It’s delicious,” she managed to speak between bites.  Justin’s face twisted into a smirk as he watched her.

“You’re a mess.”  The statement held more truth than he intended, but Shelby ignored it, wiping her mouth with the proffered napkin.

“I am sorry for being such a wreck last night, but I swear I’m not some basket case.”  She finished off the last of her coffee.  “And I promise that whatever demons my father and I have to face, your career and your music will not be affected.”  Finally, Justin seemed to relax slightly and the smile on his face was genuine.

“I was going to send him a fruit basket or something.”  The way he said it, shy and slightly embarrassed, had Shelby shaking with the giggles that she could not seem to contain.  It wasn’t long before he joined in with her, his own shoulders shuddering with barely contained mirth. Shelby wasn’t really sure what was so funny about his comment.  Maybe it was imagining the look on her father’s face, receiving an edible bouquet from a pop star.  Or maybe it was thinking about someone like Justin cowering and kissing up to her father.  Either way, it was enough to break the tension, and she was thankful for it. 

“You don’t need to do that, really.”  She managed to tell him when her laughing had settled.  “He’s pissed at me, and I’m sure he knows that you’re the innocent in all of this.  He probably forgot all about it, anyway.”

Justin watched her carefully, his eyebrows drawn in an expression she couldn’t figure out.  It made her squirm, suddenly uncomfortable in a strange, tension-filled way.  Finally, he spoke, shaking himself of whatever thoughts had been moving through his head.  “Your dress has been taken to the cleaners, but my cousin Rachel has some clothes that should fit you, if you’d like.”

Shelby looked down at the sweatpants she was in a shrugged.  “These are fine.  Thank you.”

“No problem,” he set his empty cup in the sink and started to clean up after her breakfast.  “I’ve got to head into town later this morning; can I give you a ride somewhere?  To your car?”

“I can just call a cab, it’s no big deal.”

Justin paused in the middle of wiping down the counter, the tension back in his shoulders.  “I’d prefer to take you into town.  It’s really okay.”  When she didn’t seem to understand what he was getting at, he sighed.  “I don’t need a cabbie calling into the tabloids telling them they picked you up from my house wearing my sweatpants.”

“Oh.”  Well, didn’t she feel stupid.  “Right.”  Justin was silent as he finished cleaning up the kitchen.  Shelby had no idea what to say to him anymore.  Without the courage of alcohol in her system, he was a stranger and difficult to figure out.  Last night it had seemed easy to talk with him, joke with him, and she had no fears.  Now, though, she was at a loss and extremely uncomfortable.  She needed a cigarette.  “Do you have smoke?”

Justin glanced at her, his eyebrows notched in that same, faraway look.  “Yeah, just a second.”  He fumbled around in a drawer, coming up with a battered pack of cigarettes and a lighter.  “I’ll join you.”

He led Shelby through the kitchen and down a hallway, ending up on an outdoor patio.  He lit one for her, handing it over carefully before lighting one and taking a long drag. 

“I thought you were quitting.”  She asked, knowing she’d said it last night but not remembering his answer.

“I thought so, too.”  He grinned, and Shelby was relieved to see it was genuine.  “It’s a hard habit to break, though, and I’m not sure I want to quit just now.” 

“I know how that goes.”  She realized the truth of her statement and was embarrassed, but he let the comment go.  “Thank you, Justin, for everything.  I’m sorry I pulled you into my mess.”

Quietly, he stubbed out his butt, giving her a long glance.  “I seem to have a knack for swooping in at just the right time.  You looked like you needed a hand.” 

She couldn’t quite tell if he was joking, but she went with it anyway.  “In more ways than one, my friend.”

The look he was giving her seemed to tear straight through, and she felt oddly exposed under his intense gaze.  She really didn’t know what to make of this man, and that was unusual for Shelby.  It left her feeling like she was floating, but firmly planted to the spot where she stood.  It was all making her rather dizzy.

Or maybe that was just Justin.

“Are you ready to get going?”  She followed him back into the house, trailing slowly behind.  She didn’t want to go home.

“Yeah, just let me grab my things.”  She ascended the stairs, gripping the banister with more force than necessary.  Going home meant facing her father, and rehashing the fight from last night.  She was twenty-five years old and her father still treated her like a rebellious teenager.  Unfortunately, she still reacted that way, too. 

Without her dress, Shelby only had her small clutch.  So she grabbed that and her heels, padding back down the stairs.  Justin was waiting for her at the bottom.  She glanced down at her bare feet, wiggling her toes against the hardwood.  Justin was watching her, eyebrow raised, and his eyes flitted between her feet and the heels in her hands.

“I’ll just leave them off.”  She finally decided, receiving a smirk in response.

It was bright outside, the sun beating down on her shoulders and enhancing her headache.  She wished she had her sunglasses and a better outfit, but she was limited in her choices at the moment.  If she weren’t so concerned with what she was going to do when she got home, she would try and enjoy the beautiful weather.  Unfortunately, she was too preoccupied with the mess she’d made to think of sunshine.

Once seated in the car, Justin turned to look at her while he started the engine.  “Where to?”

“I took the limo with my dad…so…the Starbucks on Sunset?”  She felt his eyes on her, again, so she explained.  “I’m just going to call my friend to come get me.  I’m not ready to deal with my dad, and I don’t think you want to be seen dropping me off, either.  It’s best if he thinks you’ve stopped hanging out with me.”

It was Justin’s turn to mumble, “oh.”  She could tell that the weight of his decision to help her was really settling in, and she was slightly bothered by his silence.  Her father seemed to creep into every instance of her life, and this was no exception.  Really, they should have been able to laugh last night off and chalk it up to a good time.  But instead, Justin was on edge because her father decided his fate at the record label.  It sucked.

“Don’t worry, he won’t know and things will be fine.”  She let out the breath she’d been holding.  “You’ll be rid of me soon enough and this will all be over.”

“Shelby,” Justin’s voice was low, soft.  It was a different tone.  When he didn’t continue, she decided to end his misery.

“It’s okay, Justin.  You were being a gentleman, you helped me out, and that’s that.  No hard feelings if we’re not best friends now.  I’ll just have a great story to tell my grandkids one day.”  She forced a smile she wasn’t really feeling.  This was not how Shelby usually rolled, and the black cloud that was hanging over her was getting to be too much of a drag.

“That’s not what I was going to say.”  He defended his silence, “I just…the record label has been on my ass lately, and I don’t think pissing the CEO off by getting his daughter shitfaced is the best idea right now.” 

“I get it.”  She sighed.  “I get it.”

“I’m not usually an asshole.”

“And I’m not usually a drunken mess that pukes in a stranger’s car,” she countered, giving him a defiant look.

“Touche.”  He managed a small smile, which made Shelby feel a little bit better.  The rest of the ride was quiet as Justin drove.  Shelby watched him out of the corner of her eye, deciding that she liked him by the way he drove his car.  It was a psychology thing, really, but it was also a personal hobby of hers.  She was a people watcher, and Justin Timberlake was an interesting case study.  He never seemed to sit still.  If his fingers weren’t tapping a beat on the steering wheel, his head was bobbing to the music, or his leg was bouncing slightly.  His grip on the stick shift was casual, and Shelby had a sudden heat flash as she imagined how those hands might caress a lover.  She shook her head away from those thoughts.  She was intrigued, to say the least.

He pulled the car into the lot and put it into park.  He kept it running.  “I’m sorry this is so…informal.”

Shelby shrugged, giving Justin a wide grin.  “Don’t worry.  I’ll be okay.”  She offered him a handshake, which took the singer by surprise.  “Maybe I’ll see you in New York.”  And with that, she stepped out of the car.

Justin hesitated a moment before putting the car into gear and driving away.