JC walked through the front door and found himself short of breath. His emotions suffocated him. He gasped desperately for air, reaching from the depths of his being. It was as if his angst was strangling him. It was the most powerful reaction he’d ever had. Slowly with every breath, he stabilized. Holy shit, emotions. Could you please not kill me before this tumor does?
No, wait. This tumor won’t kill me. Dr. Franklin will remove it and hopefully life will be good again. He sighed. He’d felt more alive in the last hour than the past several months. It was a nice realization, but the intensity could be turned down several notches.
How do you tell someone you have cancer, anyway? Call them up and tell them, Guess what? ‘I found out I have cancer today.’ That’ll be GREAT fun. JC groaned. Divulging the news to others would make the disease even more real. Voicing it made it more concrete, somehow. JC couldn’t place why. He wished he could tell his family in person. But, given his parents were in Maryland and Tyler and Heather in various parts of the country, that notion wasn’t feasible. He staggered over to his studio to make the call.
Come on, Josh. The longer you wait, the more you torture yourself. On the same token, he didn’t want to tell his family. He didn’t want them to worry about him. Not when he was so far away. They were retired now, so they had the time to visit. Still, constant bicoastal flights would take a tool on their aging bodies. You’re fishing for excuses. JC took a deep breath and dialed their home number.
“Hello?” Roy’s genial voice greeted him.
JC’s throat tightened up again. This was going to be harder than he thought. “Hey, Dad.”
“Hey Josh. Did you have your appointment today?”
“Yeah. I have bad news.”
“Okay. What is it?”
“I have stage 1 vocal cancer.”
Roy sighed. “I was afraid of that. What did the doctor say?”
“It’s only in one spot and not affecting my cords. It can be removed with surgery, which has been scheduled. Then I probably undergo treatment to make sure it’s fully gone.”
“We’ll be there. Are you holding up okay?”
“I’m scared, Dad. Dr. Franklin said my cords might be damaged in the treatment, meaning I can’t sing anymore.”
Roy didn’t respond. He didn’t know what to say to comfort his son. What could you say?
“I don’t understand why this is happening.”
“I don’t either, Josh. But we’ll get through it together. God will guide us.”
JC sighed. “Is Mom home?”
“Yes, she is. Hang on.”
“Hi sweetie” She answered a moment later.
JC’s insides lurched. Karen sounded happy and he had to break her heart. “Hi. I got the results back today.”
“Good news or bad news?”
“Bad, unfortunately.”
“Is it cancer?” Karen inquired before her voice broke.
“Yes, Mom. I have stage 1 vocal cancer.”
“Oh honey.” She sniffled. “I’m so sorry.”
It broke JC’s heart to hear his mom cry. She had been his rock all his life and made so many sacrifices to allow him to pursue his dreams. And now she was distraught because he had a cancerous tumor in his throat. Guilt gnawed at his conscience. “No, I’m sorry.”
“You can’t help that you’re sick.” She replied.
“But you’re crying. I don’t want you to cry because of me.”
“I’m crying because it’s unfair. I want the best for you, honey. And life keeps dealing you blows like this.” She sighed and cleared her throat. “What happens now?”
“I have surgery scheduled in a week and a half followed by treatment.”
“Would you like us to visit a few days beforehand?”
JC’s throat tightened up slightly. Telling her was one thing; dealing with this reality in person was an entirely different equation. “Yes. I’d love that. I need good company and a bowl of your famous chili.”
Karen chuckled. “I’ll gladly make some while we’re here. Have you told Tyler and Heather?”
“No. You and Dad are the only two who know about this, aside from my doctor.”
“Do you need me to?”
“I want to tell them myself.” He sighed. “Granted, it won’t be easy. But I’d feel better if they heard it from me.”
“Perfectly understandable, sweetie.” Her voice broke. “I’ll let you go. I love you, Josh.”
She probably doesn’t want me to hear her cry again. “And I love you, Mom. I’ll talk to you soon.”
Now what? He didn’t know who to turn to next. Of course, he couldn’t tell everyone he knew in one night. However, that conversation tore at his heart enough. How many more could he manage? He sighed and called Tyler and Heather; both went to voicemail. He left a message and tossed his phone aside on the bed. How am I supposed to keep this a secret from the media?
He groaned. The last thing he needed was photographers chasing him when he left places and asking him prying questions about the disease. And what if they made it out to be worse than it was? Fabricate some saga about him dying from cancer. “You’re in the public eye; you’re supposed to care what others think,” Eric’s words resonated with him. He was supposed to care. He had an image to uphold. People could easily take pictures of him leaving a hospital, and sites like TMZ could get a hold of them.
Wait, why am I worrying about this? I have cancer for crying out loud! I need to worry about getting myself well. Then again, I don’t want to people I love find out through some trashy blog site. And one of those people was Justin Timberlake. Despite the emotional distance, JC still respected his younger surrogate brother. He was happy to see Justin’s profile rise because he knew how much of a hard worker he was. The thought of Justin finding out via a secondhand source devastated him. He called but got voicemail once again.
Hey Justin, it’s JC. I have some terrible news. Rumors might start circulating around but I want you to hear it from me. Anyway, if you could call me when you get this, I’d appreciate it, bro. Thanks. Talk to you soon.
Damn, I wish people would answer their phone when I call. JC snorted. I suppose I’ll find out who my real friends are. Not that I don’t already know. His phone buzzed and he picked it up. Justin was calling back. That was quick.
“Hello?”
“Hey. What’s going on?” Justin sounded confused and concerned.
“I’m sick, Justin. Actually, it’s more than that.” He let out a throaty cough.
“You sound awful.”
JC snorted. “Trust me, this isn’t the worst of it. I have vocal cancer.”
Dead silence for several moments. JC knew this was a bombshell for his friend. It was like finding a chink in your childhood hero’s armor. They’d built a friendship around mutual respect for one another. Would Justin’s impression of him change?
“No. No. not you.” Justin finally whispered. “Of all the people in this world… no. Please tell me you’re lying.”
“I wish I was. Would I lie about this kind of thing?”
“Is it bad?”
“It’s a small tumor and not on my cords themselves. My doctor will remove it with surgery. But I still have to go through chemo to make sure the disease is gone.”
His voice cracked. “When is the surgery?”
“A week from Monday.”
“I’ll be there.”
“You don’t have to. You’re busy.”
“That’s petty stuff. You’re my older brother that I’ve looked up to since I was 10. I don’t care what I have to do; I’ll be there.” Justin replied firmly.
JC smiled. It comforted him to know their friendship was still solid after all these years. “It would mean the world to me if you do come.”
“Trust me, I will. Have you told any of the other guys?”
He hadn’t thought past telling Justin. Considering how draining the past few hours had been, he didn’t have the strength. “No, I haven’t”
“I can, if that would make things easier.”
“Actually, it would help,” He sighed. “I don’t know what to do, Justin. The thought of losing my voice scares the shit out me.”
“Let’s not think about that. Your doctor said it was small, right?”
“Yeah. It’s only in one little spot in my throat. It’s not growing real fast but we still want to remove it.” JC coughed again.
“And the sooner, the better. It’ll be okay. You’ll make it through this. I know you can.”
JC couldn’t describe the feeling that overcame him. It was a strange mixture of relief, comfort and inspiration. “Thanks. It means a lot to hear that.”
“You’re welcome. We’ll talk soon. I love you, man,”
JC smiled. “Love you, too. Thanks for calling me back.”
“Not a problem. See ya.”
Author's Chapter Notes:
Story is fiction and I only own original characters.
I hope y'all like this. JC has to break the news now; including one surprise person. Feedback is always appreciated :)
Story Tags: postsync jc cancer tearjerker
