~~~~~*~~~~~

A week had passed since Libby's operation, and she still hadn't made any advancement in waking up from the coma. The hospital staff had begun the process of reducing the amount of sedative in her IV drip, and although her most recent scan had revealed some signs of repair to the damaged area of her brain, the external signs of improvement hadn't been so obvious.

Clare's life had settled into a pattern of waking early in the morning, heading to the hospital for a quick visit, going to work, returning to the hospital for an evening visit and then going home to get as much sleep as her body would let her.

She was emotionally and physically wrung out. Due to the stress and anxiety that her body was under she had little appetite for food, and consequently she'd lost a considerable amount of weight in just that short space of time. Her face was pale and the dark circles under her eyes only seemed to become more prominent with each passing day. She was surviving on a diet of strong coffee and peppermints.

Johnny Wright, Clare's boss, had been very understanding about Libby's condition and had been kind enough to transfer a lot of Clare and Libby's work to another of their colleagues. And yet, Clare still felt overwhelmed by the amount of work that she had to do.

Alongside Sara and Jamie, who were also busy preparing for the upcoming tour, Clare was trying to organise the promotional material for both the North American leg of the tour and the European countries where the group would be performing. Recently it had involved her taking a lot of long–distance calls, and, thanks to the many time differences, she'd often be working at the Compound until the early hours of the morning.

Back before Libby's accident, both Clare and Libby had arranged to do this arduous task together. They'd planned to order in lots of take out and even stay overnight at the Compound to spare them constantly having to travel back and forwards in the middle of the night. However, now that Libby was unavailable, Clare was left doing it all on her own.

On this particular night, Clare was sorting out the details of a promotional competition where fans in the UK could win free tickets to one of the concerts, and, despite it being eleven thirty at night, she had no immediate plans to finish up and head home.

In the past few weeks, Clare had found that her work kept her mind occupied just enough to stop her worrying about Libby, and had meant that she had an excuse to spend as little time at the apartment as possible. Although she was shattered and loved her little home, she still hated being there without Libby.

As she headed back to her office from the side room where the photocopier and fax machine were kept, Clare was startled by JC who suddenly seemed to appear from out of nowhere.

"Oh Jeez, you scared me!" She exclaimed as she dumped the heavy paperwork that she'd been carrying onto her desk and turned around to give him her full attention. "What are you doing here so late?" She asked as she looked into his face. She noticed his troubled expression and a familiar sinking feeling appeared in the pit of her stomach. "Is everything okay?" She asked him hesitantly, unsure whether or not she really wanted to know. She wasn't sure that she could handle any more bad news.

With all that had been going on Clare hadn't had much opportunity to speak to him lately, and although she'd missed him, the few conversations that they'd shared in passing at the Compound had mostly been about hospital visits, or how Justin seemed to be coping with everything. Clare realised as she looked into his deep blue eyes that they still hadn't had a chance to talk about their spontaneous kiss; not that it seemed appropriate to mention after all that had happened since. It was almost as though everything that had happened before the accident had been during another lifetime.

She hadn't had much chance to speak to him recently due to all that had been going on with Libby, and when they had spoken most of their conversation had revolved around hospital visits, or how Justin seemed to be coping with everything, and Clare realised with disappointment that she still hadn't had a chance to talk to him about their spontaneous kiss. Not that it had seemed appropriate to mention after all that had happened since.

JC took a deep breath and sat himself on the couch facing her. Taking his lead, Clare perched on the edge of her desk and began anxiously chewing on a fingernail as she analysed the expression on his face. She had a feeling that she wasn't going to like what he was about to say. He leaned forward in the seat and rested his elbows on his knees, reaching a hand up to run through his dark hair.

"Clare, do you remember that night in your room when we kissed?" He asked tentatively as he met her eyes.

Clare felt like rolling her eyes. Of course I remember. She nodded and tried to fight back the smile that threatened to spread across her face at the memory. She could tell that he wasn't finished and that her smile could be premature, if not inappropriate.

"That night meant so much to me for so many reasons. I can't tell you how long I've been wanting—waiting—for something to happen between us—"

Clare bit down onto her bottom lip. Despite having longed to hear him say those very words aloud, his tone failed to fill her with the confidence that she'd hoped they might. The sinking feeling remained in her stomach.

"—But there's something I need to tell you, and I don't think you're going to like it—"

"Okay," Clare said uneasily, narrowing her eyes slightly at him. What could he possibly have to say that I'm not going to like?  Her nerves were too fried to tolerate any suspense, and she hoped that he would get it over with quickly.

Glancing down at his hands, JC took another deep breath before squeezing his eyes closed tightly. He let his head fall back and when he opened his eyes, he glanced down at her through his lashes with a tortured look on his face.

"What is it, Josh?" Clare asked nervously. His delay was only making her feel more uneasy.

"I don't know how I'm gonna say this..." he said, rubbing a hand over the stubble on his chin. Clare fought back the panic as she realised for the first time that what he had to say was bad news. Very bad. In all the time she'd known him, she'd never seen him like this.

"Then say it quickly," she told him. "Please, you're freaking me out." Whatever it was that she needed to hear, if it was going to be painful then it was better to do it quickly. Like removing a Band–Aid. One sharp pain and then it'd all be over.

"Quickly. Right." He looked her in the eye and grimaced, anticipating her reaction before he'd even finished speaking. "Me and Alyson are getting back together," he said in a rush. "For good."

Clare stared at him in silence, her eyes flicking between both of his as she stared at the agonised expression on his face. Somehow she found to strength not to let her reaction show. "Right..." she muttered bitterly, "well, thanks for the news flash. I've actually got work to do here so..." Her eyes flicked momentarily to the door and she wondered if she had time to leave before she started to cry. If I run out will he follow me?

"Wait!" JC exclaimed jumping to his feet as Clare turned away from him to hide her face. "I need to explain why..." He said as he held out his palm towards her, hoping to stop her from shutting him out.

Clare tried to ignore the stabbing feeling in her heart and squeezed her eyes shut so that she wouldn't cry. What is he doing to me? Doesn't he realise that everything in my life has been turned upside down? Does he really want to deliver the final blow?

"No, you don't," she told him angrily as she turned back around to face him. "You don't have to explain anything. You and Alyson are getting back together. Great! I hope you'll both be very happy together," she said bitterly, the sarcasm in her voice barely concealed.

"Clare, please listen to me!" JC begged heading across the room to her and reaching out to grasp her arm in his hand.

Clare wrenched her arm out of his grasp angrily and turned around to face him with fire in her eyes. "Don't touch me!" She growled. "You know how I feel about you—you've known all along—and yet you play with my feelings while pursuing her! You've chosen now—the worst time in my life—to tell me that you're seeing another woman. You really are a heartless bastard!" She yelled, and the tears began to pour down her cheeks.

JC hung his head as her words cut him deep. Everything Clare had said had been completely true, and yet he had no one to blame but himself. If only he hadn't gone with Alyson that night; if only he'd listened to his gut instinct and said goodbye to her at the door as he'd initially intended. But it was too late for what ifs.

He might've royally messed everything up, but there were some things that he couldn't stand by and ignore. Alyson had told him that day over lunch, and since then he hadn't been able to push aside the sick feeling that had settled in his stomach. As much as it destroyed him to do so, he knew that he needed to be fair to Clare. He had to be honest with her.

Alyson was having his child, and he had no choice but to stand by her, even if it meant hurting Clare—and himself—in the process. There were some things that it was worth making sacrifices for, he'd told himself over and over during the car ride to the Compound. Now he just hoped that after telling Clare the news he'd actually start to believe it.

~~~~~*~~~~~

Jamie sat in the middle of her sofa, cross legged with her laptop sitting across her lap. Although she was dressed in comfortable pyjama bottoms and a lacy camisole top, she still wasn't ready for bed.

Ever since she'd taken a glance at her schedule back at the Compound and looked at her 'to do' pile—really looked, not just fleetingly like she had been doing—she hadn't been able to unwind. There was still so much to do, and she was the only person who could do it. Each day it seemed the pile of paperwork on her desk grew by about an inch, and she was certain that she'd begun to hear the wood groaning under the strain.

Despite putting in almost ten hour days, she still wasn't making much impact on it all and now she'd even resorted to spending her evenings and days off working from home.

To his credit, Chris had been doing his best to help her out, or at least trying to distract her when she needed a break—not that she ever admitted to needing a break—but since he was working just as hard on preparing for the tour, a lot of the time he'd called a truce and left her to it. Tonight was no exception. He'd gone off to bed at least an hour or so before and although she'd promised to join him not too long after, Jamie was still unable to switch off from what she was doing.

Ten minutes turned into twenty, then forty and then an hour. Still she wasn't satisfied. There simply weren't enough hours in the day, or night, to get it all done; and even in her sleep she dreamt of drowning under a sea of paperwork.

Rubbing at her tired eyes, Jamie glanced away from her computer screen momentarily to check the time from the clock on the wall. She groaned aloud. Two thirteen a.m. She'd been at it for five hours and she still wasn't satisfied that she'd made decent enough headway before calling it a night.

"Are you still up?" Jamie heard a groggy voice ask, and she turned her head towards the doorway that led to the two bedrooms. Kelly stood there sleepily, rubbing one of her eyes with a balled up fist as she regarded Jamie with her other eye and let out a loud yawn. She was wearing spotty pyjama bottoms, and a colour coordinated camisole top.

"Yes," Jamie replied in a hushed voice, "only don't tell Chris. The last thing I need is earache from him..."

"Too late," Kelly replied as she heard him padding along the hallway behind her in his bare feet and glanced over her shoulder to offer him a sleepy smile. She quickly glanced back at Jamie, mouthed the word 'whoops' at her before disappearing back to the guest bedroom.

"Jam, its two a.m.!" Chris exclaimed as he walked through the doorway and looked disapprovingly over at her. He scowled at the laptop and headed over to attempt to remove it from her lap. "You've gotta stop now," he said gently but firmly but Jamie swung the laptop over of his reach and cradled it to her chest.

"There's still so much to do and if I don't do it then it won't get done!" She reasoned, repositioning the laptop back onto her folded legs and looking at him accusingly.

"Then it doesn't get done..." he said, making another attempt to reach for the computer. Jamie glowered at him but was too slow to react and he successfully pulled it away from her and walked determinedly across the room to place the laptop on the dining table. Knowing how furious she'd be if he closed it down before allowing her the chance to save her work, Chris left the screen up and turned around to face her, blocking her view of the computer with his body.

"You can't work all day and night in front of that thing. It's not good for you," he chided, his expression a mixture of disappointment and concern.

Jamie crossed her arms over her chest and pouted, feeling like a little kid being told off for staying up too late on a school night. "I'm requesting a health and safety inspection on the concert venues," she told him petulantly. "Are you sure you want to fly over the crowd in a harness during 'Sailing' without a health and safety inspector having checked it out?"

Chris held her gaze and narrowed his eyes slightly. She knew full well how much he hated heights, and how paranoid he always was about the Sailing 'gag', but he still wasn't going to let this go. He pulled a face but refused to be drawn in.

"Make it a priority for tomorrow," he said eventually, crossing the room and grabbing her hand to pull her up off the couch.

"You know, you never gave me this much grief before," Jamie told him as she allowed him to pull her out of her seat. She reluctantly made her way over to her laptop, saved the document that she'd been working on and closed it down before shutting off the power completely.

Despite her desire to finish her work, Jamie was secretly relieved that Chris had interrupted her. She needed reminding every now and again that there was more to life than work. Although, it seemed ironic that this task fell to Chris­—probably the person most capable of reminding her about her job.

"That's because we weren't dating before," he reminded her gently. "As your boyfriend it is my responsibility to give you all the grief I possibly can. Especially when it comes to you overworking."

Jamie giggled and allowed him to drag her by her arm through the apartment towards her bedroom. She placed a hand over her mouth to muffle the laughter as they passed by the guest bedroom, not wanting to disturb Kelly, who she was aware could probably hear them through the thin walls anyway.

Once inside her comfortable room and with the door closed behind them, Jamie threw herself face forward into the middle of her large, queen–size bed and stifled a groan as her back contorted painfully. The hours of sitting scrunched over her computer screen hadn't done her back any favours, and she realised now that she'd have an agonising night of cramps ahead of her for her efforts. She wriggled around trying various positions until the pain somewhat subsided.

"Backache?" Chris asked knowingly as he sat on the edge of the bed and gazed down at her with a sideways smirk. Compared to the other members of *NSYNC, Chris spent a lot of his free time on the computer working on his clothing line and other projects, and so he knew all about the effects sitting behind a computer screen for hours on end did to a person.

"Mmm..." Jamie mumbled as she turned onto her side to face him. She drew her knees up to her chest and arched her back but it made no difference. The cramps in the base of her spine refused to be soothed.

"Turn over. I'll give you a massage," Chris said as he shuffled forward on his knees and hovered next to her, waiting for her to roll back onto her stomach so that he could massage her back. Jamie happily complied and flipped over onto her stomach, letting out a contented sigh as she felt his warm hands settle onto her shoulder blades.

Five minutes into her massage and she was fast asleep.

~~~~~*~~~~~