~~~~~*~~~~~

While things were taking a turn for the better for Maggie, Gem was finding the opposite.

She'd been working every shift the hotel had offered her, but still money was tight. With the pressures of having to buy presents for both her children and the extended family, she was almost sick of the festive season before it'd even begun.

It didn't help that both Max and Austin were insisting that only the most popular, expensive toys would make them happy. Gem knew they were being ridiculous and she shouldn't give in on principle– she hadn't been raised to expect to get everything she asked for, and she certainly didn't want her sons to either–but it wasn't easy. She felt guilty that she had such little time to spend with them and that when she did she was usually tired and in a bad mood.

Scotty didn't help things much, either. As a couple, they'd never been able to discuss money without getting into an argument, even with the marriage guidance course the pastor who'd married them had insisted they take. They'd learned all about their roles in marriage, how to handle decision making as a couple, even how to deal with anger, but no matter how intently she'd listened to the pastor's advice and made mental notes to follow his guidance, in the end it hadn't made a shred of difference.

It was getting worse, too.

Anytime she came home with any carrier bags, whether they were from the weekly food shop, or even a new lipstick or nail polish to treat herself at pay day, he'd come ambling over with that look on his face that Gem knew meant he was about to work out to the nearest dollar how much she'd spent and give her grief for it. As though groceries were some kind of frivolous expenditure or something. Like the time she'd treated Austin to a new game for his Nintendo DS–his second-hand Nintendo DS–and he'd directly asked her where the money had come from; his account, or hers. Gem had wanted to rip his head off. It'd come from her account, of course, like everything else seemed to.

“Max came home with a note from Kindergarten today,” Gem said as she lifted the last of the clean dinner plates from the draining rack and dried it with a nearby dish towel. “It says he needs ten dollars for a secret santa they're doing.” She deliberately kept her back turned to Scotty so she couldn't see the inevitable look of frustration that was no doubt crossing his face. Gem had seen it too many times in the last few weeks, and she knew the next time would be one too many. She was primed to crack.

“Ten dollars?” Scotty said, the grumble evident in his voice. “What do they need ten dollars for this close to Christmas?”

Gem sucked in a breath, but it did little to ease her irritation. “Like I said,” she snapped, “secret santa.”

“So each kid is getting ten dollars, or what?”

“No,” Gem said, tightly squeezing the dish towel in between her hands. She was really too tired to have to deal with this, and she felt it could be the catalyst for yet another of their big barneys. The tension was crackling in the air along with a hundred words unsaid. “The kids each bring in ten dollars, and the teachers use the money to purchase the gifts. That way the parents who already have enough to do don't have to rush out and buy yet another gift this close to Christmas and then have it wrapped before the term ends.”

“Sounds like they'd be better off scrapping the whole thing,” Scotty said as he chugged down the last of his beer. It was funny; when they'd discussed how they could cut back on unnecessary expenditure he'd been adamant that his nightly beer habit should continue. It was his one luxury, he'd insisted. Although Gem had thought that the cable TV and sports truck were his only luxuries. But, sure, by all means change the premium brand sports drinks for the kids to basic, or remove the cereal bars from their lunch packs, Gem had thought resentfully. As long as Scotty had his beers, what else mattered?

“Nice Christmas spirit,” Gem muttered under her breath as she put away the pile of plates and shut the cupboard door with the briefest slam. It was subtle, but her irritated spouse noticed.

“I ain't got ten dollars free for some kid,” Scotty said as he got up and tossed his empty beer bottle into the trash. He stood at the counter watching Gem's back, awaiting the inevitable. She wanted an argument? Fine. Better they get on with it and clear the air, he thought. He couldn't keep walking on eggshells around her, it was making their home life miserable for everyone.

“It's not for some kid,” Gem corrected. “It's for your son. You gonna be the one to tell him he can't join in with the rest of the class?”

“Life's tough,” Scotty said. “Easier for him to learn that now than later. Worlds not gonna end if he doesn't get a lame present from his teacher. Not like he doesn't have enough toys as it is.”

“It won't be a lame present,” Gem snapped. “Ten dollars—“

“Precisely,” Scotty interrupted. “Ten dollars that can better be spent elsewhere; you know that as well as I do. You can make me out to be the bad guy all you like but you know I'm right.”

“So I guess it'll be coming out of my money then, will it?”

“That's up to you,” Scotty said with a shrug. “If you think it's important. You can do what you like with your money.”

“Funny. I thought my money was used to pay our bills...” Gem said as she turned around to face him. She folded her arms across her chest and scowled. She'd been waiting to say that for months... years, in fact. Gem knew exactly when she'd put that unsaid accusation away deep in her heart; it'd been the day she'd returned to work three months after Max had been born. She'd promised Scotty she'd do anything, no matter what, if he agreed to have a second child, but she hadn't really expected him to hold her to it. “Am I right?”

Scotty answered her with a growl and not much else.

“Five years I've spent slaving at that hotel so you can set up your own business and what happened? You got bored and tried night school. So I continue working my ass off to get you through that, and what happens? You got bored and changed courses halfway through. And then? You decided it wasn't what you wanted after all and you quit to set up your own garage with no formal training. When's it gonna end, Scotty?”

“So our problems are all my fault, are they?” Scott snapped back, his temper flaring. “Funny, I remember five years ago when we had plenty of money and time to do what we wanted, plus a house we could afford, and what happened? Someone decided they wanted another baby.”

“Keep your voice down!” Gem hissed, rushing across the room to shut the kitchen door before her sons overheard their conversation. Max had long been bathed, read a bedtime story and put in bed, but Austin was only upstairs watching TV. She doubted he'd say anything if he did overhear them, but Austin was a tricky kid. You never quite knew how he'd react in a situation, and though he acted as though his ears were clogged up with cotton wool most of the time, Gem knew he paid far more attention to things than he let on.

“You knew I was against the idea, but you had to have your own way. God forbid Miss Gem Little doesn't get what she wants the minute she wants it.”

“For God's sake,” Gem snapped, her cheeks turning an angry red. She was furious that he'd dare bring up the subject of her broodiness. Nor did she want to admit that he was... a little bit, right. She had bullied him into having another child. But she'd been young and carefree back then; of course she'd wanted more children. And they'd been more than comfortable financially. How could she have foreseen the economic situation they'd all be affected by? Besides, Scotty had fallen in love with Max the moment he'd held him in his arms just moments after he'd been born. The little boy had completed their family, and mended their broken hearts after Scotty's older sister, Kimber, had died tragically in a car accident.

“Would you rather we just had the one child then?” Gem asked, barely recognising the words as they came out of her mouth. It was a ridiculous question to ask, but she had to ask it. She knew it wouldn't help either of them to say the words out loud, but things had gone too far to back down now. The bitterness already present in her heart spread roots and grew.

“Now you're just being ridiculous,” Scotty said with a sneer and a dismissive wave of his hand.

“Well? Come on, you started this conversation. Tell me. Would you rather have just the one child?”

“Things would be easier, yeah,” Scotty said as he let out an exasperated sigh. Gem balked and Scotty rolled his eyes at her reaction. “I'm not saying I don't love Max,” he said. “But things would've been easier with just one kid. Austin's a teenager, he's practically grown up–“

“He's eleven,” Gem bit back and Scotty met her eyes and frowned, her tone silencing him. “Austin is eleven,” she said, “and as far as him being nearly grown up, you have no idea what I've been dealing with lately with–“

“Oh here we go,” Scotty said with a bitter laugh. “Here it comes. Austin is just like me and Max–your perfect little man–has the sun shining out of–“

“Oh, shut up!” Gem shouted. “I love that boy more than anything, but you're not the one who gets calls from the school updating you on what he's been up to. You say he's got personality? I got a phone call from a parent the other day who said he made a little girl cry!”

“Girls his age are always crying,” Scotty objected with a dismissive grunt.

“It wasn't a girl his age,” Gem said. “It was one of the little girls from Max's kindergarten class. He threw something at her and it cut her cheek. Teacher said it was lucky it wasn't closer to her eye.”

Scotty sobered a little, but his face remained cold.

“Do you know what he said when the little girl's dad pulled him aside and made him explain himself?” Scotty glanced over and met her eyes, his curiosity overcoming his anger. When Gem knew she had his full attention, she continued, “he said he didn't mean to hit the girl. He said he'd been aiming for Max. Nice to know your sons are growing up to be great additions to society, isn't it?”

“Which is all my fault?”

“It's not mine!” Gem snapped. “When am I ever around to teach them anything? Those boys spend more time with members of my family than they do with me!”

“They're family, they're supposed to help out.”

“They're not there to raise our children! You think my parents thought they'd be raising grandkids after they'd finished with me and Mags? As if they don't have enough to do with the bakery business...”

“You didn't mind getting your sister to watch Max the other night at dinner. She didn't look too bothered,” Scotty said, quickly growing bored with the conversation. He was tired and irritable and every word that came out of Gem's mouth sounded like an accusation. He was sick of always having to justify his actions to her.

“She looked totally bothered,” Gem replied. “And who can blame her? She has her own life...”

Scotty snorted a laugh which irked Gem further. “Your sister? Her own life? There's a spinster in the making...”

“Oh shut the f**k up,” Gem snapped, angrily throwing the dish cloth she was still holding into the sink. “I'm done talking to you tonight. You better sleep on the sofa, or so help me I'm taking me and the boys to my moms.”

“Oh yeah?” Scott grunted, narrowing his eyes at her. “You gonna drive in the pitch black through the snow to your moms? That'll be a first.”

For Gem, that was the last straw. She narrowed her eyes until they were almost slits and practically spat her words at him, “You know what, Scott? You'd better think about what's important to you. I can't keep living like this. This isn't living. Something has to change or I swear to God this will be our last Christmas as a family.”

She broke eye contact and burst out of the room only seconds before the angry tears started to fall. What little Christmas spirit she'd had before was most certainly gone for good.

~~~~~*~~~~~