YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE ALONE

Chapter 5

            Taken aback by his abrupt manner, Abby stood still.  Her eyes showed the confusion that played in her mind.  The tone of voice in which he had spoken that one word was undeniably forceful.  Rarely did JC ever speak to anyone in that superior tone, but the few times Abby had witnessed his use of it, everyone around him knew he meant business.  Obviously, she either needed to make a choice or face his wrath.

            Without uttering a reply, Abby turned herself away and moved slowly toward the couch.  The pounding in her head begged her to find comfort on the piece of furniture that met the back of her knees.  Yet, she hesitated.  Somewhere in the inner recesses of her mind his angry words echoed.  Why would he forbid her to leave when he wanted her out of his life so badly?  None of this made any sense to her.

            “Sit down, Abby.”  His voice still sounded stern.  He forcefully closed the door against the raging wind before moving to stand before her.

            She dragged her gaze up to his.  Slowly she shook her head. 

            “I really don’t think you’re well enough to argue with me.  Please, sit down.”

            Not wanting to admit he was right, but feeling her knees tremble beneath her, she reluctantly lowered herself to the waiting couch.  Her brow was creased in pain as she clenched her hands in her lap.  Somewhere deep within her she refused to let him know how badly her head ached.

            “Where did you think you were going?  Don’t you remember how bad the weather is?”

            “I remember.”  Her tone was flat and unfeeling.

            “You do realize how late it is, don’t you?  I can’t let you drive at night with the roads in the condition they’re in.”

            “You don’t need to worry about me.”

            Her words cut him.  He knew she remembered what he had said.  Briefly he hung his head as he searched for the right thing to say.  He ran his hand through his already disheveled hair.  He silently cursed himself for the way he had treated her. 

            “Abby, I…”

            She raised a shaky hand.  “Don’t JC.  There’s nothing left to say.  You made yourself quite clear.  If I hadn’t been so careless as to fall, I’d be out of your life; I’d be gone just the way you want me to be.”

            He scowled at her words.  How could she believe he still felt that way?  The doctors knew nothing of talking to patients who were unconscious.  Obviously, they did not hear you when you spoke to them.  If they did, Abby would know how much JC still loved her.

            “I don’t want you to be gone.”  His voice was a near whisper.

            Abby stared blankly at him.  For a brief moment, she was unsure if she had heard him correctly.  Visibly, she shook her head. 

            “That’s just plain cruel, JC.  You can’t scream and yell at me, telling me to get out of your life as fast as I can one minute, and then look at me and tell me you didn’t mean it the next.  That’s just mean!”

            “Can’t a guy be wrong?”

            “You can’t be wrong when you tell someone to get out!”  Abby was angry.  Her voice was loud, and her head was splitting.  “You made yourself very clear, JC.  You mad yourself crystal clear!”

            He swallowed the huge lump in his throat.  She watched as his Adam’s apple moved with the action.  Again he ran his hand through his hair.  He backed away from her.  His nerves were on edge.  He began to pace the living room.  He stopped as he reached the fireplace and turned abruptly to look at her.

            “Who is he, Abby?”

            Caught off guard by his question, her eyes grew wide with uncertainty.

            “I don’t know who you’re talking about.  There isn’t anyone else.”

            “Yes there is.  Don’t lie to me.  I saw you with him.  I want to know who he is.”

            Abby rose to her feet, her eyes fixed on JC’s still form.  She turned to walk toward him but stopped cold as a wave of nausea hit her.  She grabbed her stomach and dropped back down on the couch, her eyes tightly closed.  JC rushed to her, kneeling before her.

            “Abby?  Are you okay?”

            Hesitantly, she opened her eyes and met his gaze.  There he was, kneeling in front of her, his eyes full of something – was it love, she wasn’t sure.  She’d seen that look before but not after something like they’d been through.

            “I’m fine.” Her answer came out as a soft whisper.

            “Please, don’t get up again.  I mean, you need to rest and stay off your feet.”

            “I need to get out of here.”

            He shook his head.  “You need to rest.  Please, lay down.”

            Doubt filled her eyes.  She felt confused. 

            “JC, really, I need…”

            He silenced her with a finger placed against her soft lips.  He allowed the corners of his mouth to lift in a slight smile.  Then, without a word, he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and guided her to lie down on the couch.

            “You just need to rest, Abby.  When you wake up we can talk this over.  I think we both have a lot of questions we need answered.  But, first, please just rest.”

            She was overcome by his gentle tone.  The look in his crystal blue eyes touched something within her heart, and silently she nodded her agreement.  He gently lifted her head and placed a soft pillow beneath her.  He reached for the afghan and placed it over her legs, allowing it to rest just above her waist.  He tucked her in with the care a father uses to tuck in his daughter before bedtime.  He leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.  Then, without a word, he stood, walked over to the fireplace and grabbed the poker.  He stirred the embers and ashes, making the fire come to life.  He returned the poker to its place beside the opening and reached for the last piece of wood sitting on the hearth.  He carefully tossed it into the stoked embers and watched as flames reappeared and engulfed the log in a welcoming fire hug.

            As he brushed his hands off on the thighs of his jeans, he turned to check on Abby.  She was fast asleep.  Minutes passed as he stood staring at her.  He marveled at her beauty, both physical and inner.  She truly was everything he had wanted in a woman.  Yet that jealous streak of his had taken control of him.  He had seen her in the restaurant with a man.  She had kissed him.  JC needed to know who he was.  He had to find out what that man could offer Abby that JC could not.  He knew he couldn’t let Abby out of his life, no matter how angry he was. 

            Anger wasn’t the only problem.  Jealousy was another of JC’s problems.  He knew what he had seen.  He knew how he felt.  Yet, he had never given her a chance to try to explain what had happened that day.  Instead, he drew his own conclusions, and made his decision.  But now, he felt he had been wrong.  Would he be able to convince her of that?  Could he persuade her not to leave?  Would she answer all of his questions?  JC could only hope he could find out everything he needed to and convince her to stay before she left him forever.

            He walked over to the arm chair across from the couch and dropped down into it.  Feeling the billowy leather cushions wrap themselves around him, he snuggled back into them, and closed his eyes.  Without another thought, he was fast asleep.