Chapter Nineteen

"So are we really going out?" Lisa asked as she followed Lance and Michael up the steps from the basement after the radio show had ended. Heather and Drew followed behind. During the show they had gotten on the topic of hanging out together. She wasn't sure if everyone was just talking or serious.

"Sure; why not?" Lance shrugged. "It's been awhile since we've all been out. Are you guys in?"

"Sure sounds like fun," Heather said. "Is Rachel coming?"

"I can't tonight," Drew spoke. "Marisol is leaving tomorrow for a couple weeks so we're spending the evening together." He quickly said his goodbyes in a hurry to get to his boyfriend's house and spend as much time with him as he could before he left.

"I don't know," Lance answered Heather's question after Drew left. "If she's here we can ask. But I don't know if she'll want to go out. Ever since the accident she sticks close to home."

"Well maybe what she needs is to get out and have a little fun," Lisa said. "Where is she?" She watched Michael and Lance exchange smiles and she nodded, smiling. "Oh."

"What?" Heather asked looking at her friends. "Okay guys; it's not cool to be keeping secrets especially when I'm the only one in the room that doesn't know what's going on."

"She's got a new boy toy."

"Really?" Heather's question covered up Lisa's 'Lance!'

"Oh yeah," Lance grinned. He looked up when the front door opened and his sister walked in.

"Jesus!" Rachel shrieked for the second time that day seeing four people staring at her. "Were you waiting on me?" She shifted the plastic shopping bag that held the ribbon and scissors to one hand along with Michael's keys so she could pull up the voice application on her phone.

"You look like shit."

"Lance!" Lisa yelled at her boss.

"Well she does," Lance said, grinning. "I expected her to look a heckuva lot better after a booty call."

Rachel felt her face heat with a blush as she read Lance's words. "I take it you and Michael didn't take advantage of me being gone then, huh?"

"Ouch," Lance laughed. "We're all going out, you wanna come with us?"

"I wanna get back to this booty call," Heather said looking at Rachel with a grin.

"I don't know," Rachel said shaking her head. "I think I might go to bed early. This whole not being able to hear has thrown my hormones out of whack. I kissed Matt for telling me something dozens have people have already told me. Sang in front of him without putting up a fight. Then in my most shining moment picked a fight with JC and bawled all over him."

"There is so much in that I want to talk about," Lance moved toward his sister. He searched her eyes. "Are you okay?"

"Jesus Lance, I compared him to Ben. How could I do that?"

"Wow," Lance whistled. "Did you kick him while he was down on the ground too?"

"I know," she sighed looking at the floor. "Luckily JC's a pretty forgiving guy." She moved passed Lance dropping the items in her hand on the counter. "Did you know JC wrote a song for me?"

"A country song?" Lance asked surprised.

Rachel nodded seeing his question. "Yeah. Even though I told him not to worry about writing for me since..." she motion with a hand toward one of her ears. "Of course he didn't listen and now he has a song. A really really really good song. That I would love to sing which I was able to sing the chorus because that's the only part of the song he has the music down for."

"Really?" Lance asked, his eyes widening. "That's great."

"No," she shook her head, sighing. "It was crap. Because here is this great song; number one no doubt and I'm not just saying that. Reading the music he has down..."

"What's wrong?"

"What's wrong is me! Judging by the look on JC face, I sounded pretty damn terrible."

"Come on Rachel; it was your first time singing something brand new. You can't expect it to be perfect the first time."

"I know," Rachel sighed, her shoulders slumping. "But I didn't expect to suck."

Lance chuckled softly pulling Rachel into a hug. His arms tightened when he felt her sigh and lean into him. The ever present phone in her hand pressed into his back.

"JC?" Heather said aloud. She looked at her friends in the room seeing the confirmation. "Nice," she smiled thinking of Lance's sister and the former NSYNCer. "So the rags were actually right?"

Michael snorted. "Not hardly. Rachel didn't cheat on Ben. Nor is she pregnant."

"Damn, so she's not having twins?"

"Where do they come up with this stuff?" Lisa asked incredulously.

"From a close family friend," Lance spoke. He pulled back from his sister giving her a smile when she met his eyes. "You didn't suck. There is no doubt about it. You may not have been in the 'How Great Thou Art' range but you're still better than the top artists out there today."

"Gee, I always wanted to be better than Justin Bieber." She said dryly.

"You could have laryngitis and still be better than Justin Bieber," Michael spoke.

"And I said top artists," Lance said, emphasizing the word top. He didn't consider the teen pop star anywhere near a top artist no matter how popular he was with the fans. "Stop being so hard on yourself. You probably sounded better than you thought and no one sings the first run through perfect. Next time you sing the song it will be better. You know there is no one better to help you than JC. Just don't freak out on him too much. You know how sensitive he is."

Rachel grinned. "He was probably second guessing himself for getting involved with me."

"I've met some of the girls JC's dated; you're no where near as crazy as some of them."

Rachel narrowed her eyes at Lance's words and hit him with a look. "So you're saying that my craziness was on par with some of them?"

Lance decided to change the subject before he dug himself deeper into the hole. "You wanna come out with us?"

~*~

Ben seethed as he watched the group talking and laughing. From his seat at the bar he had perfect view of the table where his ex was sitting. Every time she smiled and laughed the angrier he got. He swirled the amber liquid around in his glass before taking a drink. The alcohol burned on the way down. When the glass was empty he quickly ordered another.

In the weeks that followed their break up, he partied hard. Without having to worry about Rachel he hit the clubs every night and was able to talk his way into many beds. He grinned at the remembrance of one magical night that involved two lovely ladies. That had been something he had never been able to talk Rachel into - a threesome. The two women he had been with, well he was glad his ex hadn't been involved. They had been eager to please and brought him to a roaring orgasm; letting him fuck their mouths but that had been weeks ago. The viable pussy train had dried up. Sure he could still get laid if skimmed the bottom of the barrel.

After enjoying the high life for the past couple of years, getting into the best clubs and rubbing elbows with the richest people. His calendar was booked; his contact list was overflowing, invites to parties were plentiful. His phone was constantly ringing with texts and phone calls. Now his phone was unnaturally silent and his texts went unanswered. When he went to the clubs where the bouncers knew him by name and let him in immediately without waiting, gave him looks of indifference as they sent him to the end of the line. In the matter of weeks he went from being an A-lister to not even on the list.

The blame for his life turning to shit lie with Lance and probably Michael as well but he knew if there was anyone who could change Rachel's mind, it was Lance. Lance was the cause of all his problems. His relationship with Rachel had been fun until the holiday break she took from touring. It was then he noticed a difference in their relationship and Rachel herself. She was quicker to fight with him and call him out of his lies.

He shot daggers at the blonde sitting to Rachel's right. His hands moved wildly; the smile bright on his face as he was telling a story. His eyes flickered to the dark man sitting next to him. He couldn't make out the conversation but whatever Lance's boyfriend had said caused the whole table to break out in laughter. Ben noticed that Rachel's laugh had come on a delay. He also noticed her eyes spent most of time staring down at the table.

'Fucking freaks,' he thought taking a drink. He did not like Lance at all though he had to play nice. That was no easy feat; being nice to a faggot. A shiver ran through him. It was so disgusting and...vile. A man sucking off another man's dick, shoving a dick up a man's ass. The only ass a dick should enter is the firm, delectable ass of a young, pert little thing. He hated being around them just knowing what sickening acts they were partaking. He just knew Lance hadn't been the only one doing such acts. Ben could just imagine what went on in the tour bus while Lance had been touring around with his little boyband.

'Boy band,' Ben scoffed. A cover for group orgies. Oh he would have killed to be around them then only to be around the plethora of available pussies. He could only imagine just how many they had access to. He tried getting Lance to open up about the teenybopper fans but he didn't get anywhere which he figured. After all, he liked it up the ass; he wouldn't know what to do with a pussy. On a rare occurrence he rubbed elbows with the leader of their little band, Justin Timberlake, but the prick wouldn't answer any of his questions.

His hand tightened around the glass as he caught sight of the other source of his anger. He watched JC walk up to the group crowded around the table. This man was at the center. Ben wondered if the ink was even dry on Rachel's hospital release forms before he started fucking her. He swallowed half his drink when he saw his ex snap her head to the right. Her face had lit up and his jaw clenched. JC moved around the table, grabbing a vacant chair from a nearby table. The occupants shifted and moved making enough room for JC to sit down next to Rachel. The table was crowded and Ben curled his lip in disgust at the closeness between Rachel and JC. He fought the urge to walk over there and send his fist through JC's face like he did a few weeks ago. This time he'd be sure to do more damage.

It didn't help his anger any when he saw Rachel lean over and whisper in JC's ear. He couldn't see JC's right hand but he didn't need many guesses to know where it was. He sneered at the couple. 'I bet Lance fucked him too,' he thought. 'He's probably taken it up the ass just as many times as Lance has. Fucking queer.'

Opportunity struck when he watched Rachel push her chair back from the table and rose. He watched as she placed a hand on JC's shoulder, halting him in mid rise. He sneered, curling his lip. Rachel waved off everyone else before making her way through the patrons and tables to toward the bathrooms. He glanced back at the table seeing everyone back into conversation not paying any attention to Rachel.

Ben walked down the short hallway, slowing his step when the ladies' door opened and a woman came out. He sent her a friendly smile and a nod as he passed. With a hand on the men's door he hesitated, when the coast was clear, he slipped into the ladies bathroom. Pressing his back against the door, he reached behind him and flipped the lock.

Rachel opened the bathroom stall and froze when she saw Ben standing at the sink. She gasped in shock and looked around the room. Empty. She was alone.

"What are you doing in here?" Rachel hissed crossing her arms. In an attempt to protect herself? She didn't know. "You can't be in here."

"I just want to talk," Ben said, raising his hands in an innocent matter. He saw the confused look on her face and he blew out a frustrated breath. Looking at her hands, he saw she didn't have her phone. He gave a low growl and pulled his phone from his pocket.

'I just want to talk.' He tapped out on his phone before showing it to her.

"There's nothing for us to talk about," Rachel told him as she read his words. "We're over," she moved around him and turned on the water at the sink to wash her hands. Her eyes flickered to the door, wishing someone would come in. The door remained closed. 'Of all times for no female to have to use the bathroom,' she thought.

'I'm sorry Rachel,' Ben quickly typed as he moved closer to Rachel. He knew he didn't have a lot of time. Someone could come to the door at anytime.

Rachel shook her head. "It doesn't matter anymore, Ben. Being sorry doesn't excuse the fact that you've been lying to me for months. You cheated on me Ben. Not once but multiple times!"

'I thought you trusted me! We've been dating for two years, Rach. How can you just throw it all away because your brother decided he doesn't like me?'

"So you're saying it's not true?" Rachel crossed her eyes, raising an eyebrow at Ben. "You're telling me you weren't spotted at Avalon the night of my accident?" She huffed and shook her head when she saw Ben's guilty face. "Goodbye Ben."

"Damnit," Ben snapped, cursing at himself. This was not going how he had planned. "Wait...Rachel..." the words proved useless as Rachel bypassed him as she headed for the door. He reached out grabbing her forearm spinning her back around. "Please..."

Rachel looked down at the hand gripping her arm then back up at Ben. "Let me go. I have nothing more to say to you. I can't believe I wasted my time on you. You sure had me fooled but I'm not fooled anymore. There is no way I'll be ever to trust you again."

"So you're just gonna throw away...." He growled frustrated and let go of Rachel's arm to type on his phone. He grabbed her again when she made a move to leave. He gripped her forearms with each of his hands and held her against the door.

"Let me go," Rachel stared at Ben. She was starting to get scared. He had a strong hold on her arms. The grip was almost painful. "You're hurting me."

He tightened his grip as he fought to keep his anger under control. He had expected to slip in here, talk to Rachel and make some headway. He didn't to expect to completely get back in her good graces, that would take awhile but he hadn't expected to be completely shut out. Losing his anger would not help his cause. The window of opportunity was closing fast. Someone was bound to happen upon them. If not some stranger, then definitely someone from her table.

Lifting one hand, he froze when Rachel flinched as if he'd strike her. He blew out a breath trying to reign in his temper. For a flash he thought about doing what she expected. That would not help his cause. He held up one finger signaling her to hold on and grabbed his phone from his pocket again.

'You're gonna throw away two years of a good relationship for someone who failed to make it in the business?' He could see fire light in Rachel's eyes as she read his text. He kept his hold on her arm. 'I'm looking out for you Rachel. There is only one way he can take you and it's not up. You deserve someone so much better. Come on, remember how great we were. How much you loved me. I know you still love me.'

"I do not still love you," Rachel glared at Ben. She saw his eyes flash with anger.

Ben lunged, pressing his lips to Rachel's. It was a bruising kiss, angry; his lips pushing hers back into her teeth. He could feel her struggling and reached out grabbing her failing arm as she slapped at him. He gasped in pain and lifted his head, raising his fingers to his mouth. Dabbing his tongue he saw the red stain on his finger. "You bit me!"

Rachel raised her free hand wiping the back of her hand across her mouth as if she could remove Ben's kiss.

'You bit my tongue!' Ben angrily typed as he swallowed the metallic tasting saliva.

"You shouldn't have put it in my mouth!" Rachel seethed. "And I didn't throw our relationship away. You did when you cheated on me the first time! You killed any feelings I had for you when attacked my brother and Michael, spreading your ignorant views. You will never be half the man they are." The grip on her arm tightened and she tried not to wince to give him the satisfaction he was hurting her. "And don't you dare say anything about JC. A subject you know nothing on. JC is ten times the man you'll ever be. And I don't care if he never does anything in the music business again. I am not with him because of who he is or what he can do for me. Which is more than I can say for you."

'You're gonna regret this.'

Rachel looked at him. Her words had been true. There were no more feelings in her for Ben. She felt nothing. "I already do." She told him, seeing his eyes narrow. "Release me before I scream and have the whole place outside this door." When Ben's grip loosened, she took advantage and quickly pulled away from him.

It took all she had not to run from the bathroom and create a scene. She tried to slow her pace but she felt it was too quick. Her steps felt off balanced and she was shaking. The table with Lance and JC seemed so far away. It felt like hours before she finally reached the table. With a hand on the back of her chair, she squeezed between her chair and Lance's to take her seat. Keeping her gaze lowered she reached for her water, but her hands were shaking too much to grasp the glass.

JC's hand reached for hers beneath the shield of the table top. Their fingers threaded together and the trembling in her hand somewhat eased. Raising her head she could read the questions in his eyes. Pulling her eyes from JC's she looked around the table and noticed everyone's eyes were on her. A blush swept across her face.

"You ever have the feeling that everyone in the room is looking at you?" Rachel spoke as she reached for her phone. The minute it was in her hand it vibrated causing her to nearly drop it. "Because I have that feeling right now and you guys are really creeping me out." Intending to unlock her phone so she could pull the talk-to-text application back up she saw the text message notification on her locked screen.

'This isn't over.'

The threat felt real. Suddenly she didn't feel very safe anymore. Her upper arms tingled and when she licked her lips, she could still taste Ben. When she picked her head up, all eyes were still on her. This time she could read the worry in them; the confusion. Removing the message from her screen she pulled up the application.

"I don't think," she started then stopped. "I want..." she sighed, "I'm ready to go home." Being out with friends had lost its appeal. No longer did she feel like laughing, talking and gossiping. Ben could still be in the place and that made her feel uncomfortable. She shouldn't let it bother her; she should push him from her mind. Even has she tried, she could still feel his grip on her arms; the way his fingers cut into her skin. She shivered and felt JC's squeeze her hand.

"What?" Lance asked looking at his sister confused. He knew something was wrong the minute he noticed her walking back to their table.

"That must have been some bathroom trip," Heather said.

"What's going on?" Lance asked leaning toward Rachel. He grew even more worried when he saw tears forming in her eyes. "Are you okay? Are you sick?"

The last thing Rachel wanted to do was start crying. It would cause a scene and the next thing she'd know it would be all over TMZ and Perez Hilton how she broke down in public and how she was going crazy.

"No, no," Rachel looked at Lance. "I'm just... I'm okay. Really," she told him and from the look he was sending her; he didn't believe her for a minute. "I'm just ready to go."

"Okay," Lance exchanged looks with Michael as he reached for his wallet to pay their tab.

"Wait," Rachel reached out, halting Lance's movements before he could pull his card out. "Stay and spend time with your friends."

"Rachel..." Lance looked at her confused. "You want to go home. You rode with me."

"I know; I know. But," she turned her head and looked at JC. He looked just as confused as Lance by her sudden behavior. "JC can take me. Right?"

JC blinked before he cleared his mind, nodding. "Of course. If you want to stay Lance, I can take her home."

"I don't know..." Lance looked from JC to his sister. "I think I should take you. It's obvious something's got you upset."

It was on the tip of her tongue to tell Lance went happened in the bathroom. If that happened though, he was liable to cause a scene in his anger, especially if Ben still happened to be there. Cops would be called and that would be a bigger scene. She'd rather just wait until they were home to mention it but that didn't mean she wanted to cut everyone's fun short.

"Please stay," Rachel spoke softly, squeezing his wrist where her hand still laid. "I promise I'm okay. I just want to leave."

Lance stared at Rachel, searching her eyes before he finally sighed and nodded. "Alright. If you wanted to spend time with C, all you had to do was say something. He sees you more than I do and you live with me."

Rachel rolled her eyes as she stood. "Oh Lance, no need to be jealous. We just like different things," she said with a teasing glint in her eyes.

"Not all that different," Heather deadpanned, causing the table to break out into laughter, lightening the mood one again.

"I'll see you when you get home and don't worry," Rachel told Lance when she leaned down to hug him. "Bye guys." She waved to the rest and made her away around the tables to the front door with JC close behind, his hand on the small of her back guiding.

"For the first time in my life, I wish I had been a fly on the wall in the women's bathroom."