May 5th, 2000

Biloxi, Mississippi

Lights flashed, twisted, and twirled around the stage in betweens puffs from the smoke machine, and pyrotechnics exploded from their containers. All the while, Lance and Annaleigh were sitting in the middle of the stage playing game after game of “Rock, Paper, Scissors” over who was going to house *NSYNC at their homes while they had a few days left before the start of tour.

It was only a couple of days away and Annaleigh had never felt more excited, more scared, and more relaxed all at the same time. The stage was even better than she could’ve imagined it looking; much different than how they had imagined it on napkins.

The floor of the stage had a lot of open space, with a couple levels connected with stairs. The very front of the stage had a section cut out for a glass floor mini stage that could rotate and be moved out into the middle of the crowd. Over the back there was an awning like structure with a ramp on both sides of the stage for the boys to run back and forth across the stage.

Curtains obscured the area backstage, keeping the hardworking crew members from view. On either side of the stage, was an area where the band would be playing. All the instruments were set up, but as the crew were testing lights and pyro (with Wade’s voice coming in through the speakers), they couldn’t rehearse.

 “Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!”

“…One more time, the lights were in my eyes.”

“Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!”

“…One more time, I couldn’ hear you count over the pyro.”

“Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!”

“…One more time, I—“

“Ace!” Annaleigh put her hands up defensively when at Lance’s laugh-groan. “We’ve already played eleven games. I won. You lost.” He pointed his finger in her face. “You’re taking Chris in.”

“Nooo,” Annaleigh groaned before holding her hands out towards him. She curled one hand into a fist, holding it over her palm. “One more game; best 11 outta 15.”

“You’re not going to win that one either,” a voice behind Lance said. Annaleigh let out a loud scream, Lance slapped his hands over his ears, jumping to her feet before rushing over to give Jasmine a tight hug.

“You’re actin’ like you haven’ seen her in a while,” Darren commented with an amused smile, reaching his hand out towards Lance. Lance slapped Darren’s palm in greeting.

“You’re jus’ jealous she didn’ hug you first,” Jasmine replied, planting a hand on her hip as she turned to face her brother. Darren silently reached out a hand and pushed her forehead back. Jasmine slapped at his hand before sticking her tongue out at him. “An’ because I’m goin’ ta be her plus one at the party after the concert.”

“Oh, I see how it is, ya jus’ wan’ the free stuff from me,” Annaleigh said with a roll of her eyes. Lance let out a small laugh. He knew exactly how it felt, but he always thought of it as something pretty funny.

He barely heard from people over the years until the news went out that a tour stop would be coming to their city. It was then he got non-stop phone calls from old friends, acquaintances, and family members asking how he was doing before the inevitable questions about free tickets and backstage passes came about.

“If you have connections, use ‘em,” Jasmine replied with a wicked grin, shrugging her shoulders. “Now, I was wonderin’ ‘bout backstage passes…” She stopped talking, spotting the look on Annaleigh’s face, “and you already have ‘em don’ you?”

“And have you complainin’ ‘bout how I couldn’ get you into the concert for hours—“

“And hours,” Darren added.

“And hours,” Lance said with a sigh.

“And hours on end until I ship out for the next show?” Annaleigh asked, waving her hand in Lance and Darren’s direction silently thanking them. “Fat chance. That makes ‘bout as much sense as tits on a bull.”

“Annaleigh Charlotte Carr, have I told ya how much I love ya?” Jasmine asked, bumping her friend’s hip with her own. “Ooh, that means I need ta go out and buy a new outfit and you’re comin’ with me.” She looped her arm through Annaleigh’s, resting her head on her friend’s shoulder.

“I already have wardrobe picked out, but I thank ya kindly,” Annaleigh replied, unwrapping her arm from Jasmine to give Darren a hug. Lance watched as she wrapped her arms around his neck, allowing him to lift her off the ground as he hugged her back. He hiked an eyebrow in their direction, locking eyes with Darren who widened his slightly. “Looks like someone’s been enjoyin’ the cafeteria food at school.”

“All the fried food you can eat, what’s not ta like?” Darren asked, patting his stomach.

“You’ll be rivaling Joey soon if you’re not careful,” Lance commented with a laugh as he got to his feet.

“I heard that!” Joey’s voice came floating towards them.

“They’re gettin’ fitted for wardrobe with the harnesses,” Lance explained with a roll of his eyes.

Darren put a hand on top of Annaleigh’s head after setting her down onto the floor, tilting it back just slightly to smile at her. “Well, aren’ you a sight for sore eyes.”

“Aren’ I always?” Annaleigh asked with a charming smile, batting her eyelashes at him. Darren chuckled, giving a smile of amusement, but didn’t answer. Lance felt his jaw drop just slightly, which he turned into a smile of amusement, exchanging glances with Jasmine who rolled her eyes.

Lance lifted his shirt to wipe at his face before pointing a finger above him. “We’re starting up there, and being lowered on harnesses to start No Strings Attached like we’re puppets,” he said, changing the subject.

“Don’ tell us everythin’” Jasmine said with an excited squeal, clapping her hands together, doing a quick jog in place. “I wanna be surprised.”

 “You guys came just in time,” Wade said as he walked over to the two of them, flipping the microphone in his hands into the air before catching it. He offered Darren his free hand. “Wade Robson, choreographer for the boys.”

“Darren Dale,” Darren replied, shaking his head. “Lance and Ace’s best friend.” He angled his head towards Jasmine. “You remember my sister.”

“Hey,” Jasmine said, lifting a hand to twirl a lock of her hair around her finger.

“Hi.” Wade gave her a warm smile. “I hope you enjoy the show.” He lifted the microphone to his mouth. “We were just about to go through a full run through.” Lance tilted his head back, groaning. His groan mixed in with JC, Joey, Justin, and Chris’s. His feet started to throb as if he had already spent two hours dancing on them; which he had.

 “Y’all are complainin’, but my fingers feel like they’re on fire,” Annaleigh said to Lance, holding her hands out towards him. The pads of her fingers were a bright red.

“Ohh, poor baby,” Wade commented, turning his head towards her, sticking out his bottom lip into a pout. Annaleigh hiked an eyebrow in his direction. “You’re the one who chose not to play with a pick. If these guys have to suffer through an hour or two of dancing, you have to suffer through an hour or two of pain.”

“Guess I forgot to mention how much of an ass Wade can be the closer it gets to the start of a show,” Lance said, pinching the bridge of his nose with his fingers.

Wade’s name was on the line just as much as NSYNC’s was. This was his first huge choreography job. He was getting praise for his work for Bye Bye Bye but this was a whole new album with new choreography that needed to reflect changes in their style of music from song to song.

“Bein’ a brunette is really kickin’ in, ain’t it?” Annaleigh asked, putting her hands on her hips. Wade’s eyebrow twitched, but he didn’t say anything before he made his way towards the back of the stage. Lance’s eyebrows knitted together just slightly as he regarded the exchange.

He had noticed that the two of them had been getting along more now that he had turned down his flirting. For now, anyway. When he was on the job he was focused into getting the best out of his clients but he was still a kid, he was still as young as Justin and Annaleigh. They all knew when to be serious and when to goof off and have fun, they still had a few years left of being teenagers after all.

Annaleigh turned back towards Darren and Jasmine. “You didn’ happen ta see my mom or dad out there, did you? They said they were goin’ ta be here soon.”

“Together?” Jasmine asked, blinking in surprise. She and Darren exchanged glances.

“Like together-together?” Lance asked, crossing his arms over his chest, startled by the question. Annaleigh let out a short laugh as she looked at each of her friends in turn.

“Are you that surprised they want ta come see the show?” she asked.

In short, yes. Lance had seen and heard Annaleigh asking her mom to return, or inviting her to events only to have her not show up at the last minute. Annaleigh would be down in the dumps about it for a couple of days before brightening back to her normal self, convincing anyone that would listen that “something just came up” or that “she was just busy” or anything else she could think of.

“Considerin’ I practically had to drag you here the last time Lance was performin’ here? Yes,” Darren replied.

Lance bowed his head, slightly, shifting his gaze to the floor just slightly. She was having a hard time the last he was performing in Mississippi, she felt like he had abandoned her it shouldn’t have come as a surprise that she didn’t want to come to a show nevertheless to see him.

Hell, he had chosen to stay in Orlando a fair few times, opting to fly his family out to spend time with him instead of taking the time to go back home. But, things were getting better between them, that was something he knew he could hold onto. At least until you finally tell her about her dad. He shook his head slightly, trying to knock the thought out of his head. He tried to stay focused on tour and performing anytime his feet were touching the stage.

“Are you sure she’s actually going to be here this time?” Jasmine asked the question that was on everybody’s mind, lightly placing her fingers on Annaleigh’s arm. “I jus’ don’ want you to be disappointed, girl.”

“Yeah,” Lance agreed.

Although, part of him felt like she was getting used to it. It had been her and her dad for a long time. It had to have been hard for either of her parents to know that while he and Annaleigh were forming a closer bond, her dad was the reason her mom had left in the first place. It was hard enough for him to keep it quiet.

“Sweet Pea.”

“Ma.” Lance twisted his mouth to the side, wincing slightly as Annaleigh hurried over to her parents to give her mom a hug. Her dad hung back to the side, talking to Johnny. Lance noticed he was walking with a bit of a limp. “Hey, daddy.”

“Hi, Sweetheart,” Ryan said, giving his daughter a warm smile. He then shifted his gaze over to Lance, Darren, and Jasmine. “And the gang’s all here.”

“Hi, Mr. Ryan, Miss Caroline,” Lance said with a closed-lipped smile, angling his head just slightly. “How are you doing?”

“Mighty fine, thank you,” Caroline replied, brushing her fingers back behind her ears. “You’ve all grown so much.” She stepped forward to give the three of them a hug. “It’s wonderful to see y’all.” Caroline gave Lance a smile, briefly cupping his face with her hands. “Tell Diane I said ‘hello’ for me?”

“Yes, ma’am, I will,” Lance replied with a smile.

“Come on, I want y’all ta meet the rest of the band,” Annaleigh said, grasping her parents’ wrists, pulling them towards the back of the stage.

“Make it quick, we have to start up rehearsals, soon,” Johnny said, turning his arm to glance at his watch. “And I have to tell you all something.”

“Oh, well, here comes Mika now,” Annaleigh said. “He plays the keyboard in the band. He jus’ started ‘round the same time I did.” She let go of her parents hands and waved the teenage boy over. “Mika, come meet my parents.”

Lance looked over at Mika and watched as his pace slowed to a stop as a startled look quickly passed over his features. He lifted his foot, looking like he wanted to change directions and walk away, but he put a smile to his face, extending his hand as he made his way over to the Carr family.

“Mika, this is my mom Caroline, and my dad Ryan,” Annaleigh said with a smile. “Mom, dad, this is Mika.”

“That’s such an unusual name,” Caroline said with a half smile, shaking Mika’s hand.

“Um, yeah,” Faye said, his face turning a bright pink. He then slid his hands into his jeans pockets, giving Ryan a nod in greeting. “Nice to, um, meet you, sir.” Lance watched as a muscle in his arm twitched before he removed his hand from his pocket, holding his hand out towards Ryan.

Lance watched the two men shake hands and blinked a few times spotting the same shaped jaw, rounded nose, the same square shoulders…Lance swallowed thickly, turning to look over Jasmine’s head at Darren, who looked just as startled, confused, and he felt.  He was sure he was looking at Annaleigh’s half-brother.

“Likewise,” Ryan replied before clearing his throat.

“And you already know Lance and Jasmine, but this is Darren, Jasmine’s brother,” Annaleigh continued, motioning towards his friend.

“Hey, what’s up?” Darren said, shaking Mika’s hand.

“Well, now that I have you here, and Lance you can relay this to everyone else, but…” Johnny trailed off, rubbing his hands together, smiling at the suspense he was building. He motioned towards Annaleigh who peered curiously up at him. “How would you like to open the tour alongside your dad?”

“Seriously?” Lance asked.

He knew Ryan used to be a huge musician, but he also knew of him just as the Youth Pastor at their church. Not only that, but he taught Religious Studies at the local school. He had put his music past way behind him, and had obviously tried his hardest to steer his only daughter away from the limelight as she grew up.

“That’s awesome,” Jasmine said with a wide smile. “Father and daughter on stage together? And Mr. Ryan, it’d be cool to see you playin’ your guitar again.”

“And Mika, we were hoping for you to join in, to showcase the skills of our two newest, and youngest, members of the NSYNC band,” Johnny said, indicating Mika, whose eyes widened, taking a small step back.

“Oh, Sweetheart,” Caroline said, her hands flying up to cover her mouth. “That’d be fun to watch.”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Annaleigh said, waving her hand in the air. “You want my dad, Mika, and I to play a couple of songs to open the first night of tour?”

“Yes,” Johnny replied with a simple nod of his head.

“No,” Annaleigh replied with a bark of laughter. “First off, my dad isn’ inta this kind of thing anymore.” Ryan opened his mouth to respond, but she kept going. “I mean it took a lot of beggin’ jus’ for him to let me go out to Orlando to audition for the band and second of all; no.”

“That’s not a reason to decline, Sweet Pea,” Caroline said in a soothing tone.

“It is for her,” Lance replied. Caroline looked over at him, a solemn look crossing her face. Lance’s stomach started to knot painfully in the center of his stomach.

“I think it’s a good idea,” Caroline tried again.

“Ma, you didn’ even want me ta go to Orlando either,” Annaleigh said, rounding on her. Caroline briefly closed her eyes. She crossed her arms over her chest, looking back and forth between the two of them. “So, what’s changed? What’s going on?”

“Let’s not talk about this right now, ok?” Ryan asked, clearing his throat, putting his hands on his daughter’s shoulders. “We don’ want to take your mind off of rehearsal.”

Too late, Lance thought to himself with a snort.

“Why don’t you go an’ get ready and we’ll talk to you afterwards?” Caroline added, clasping her hands together in front of her lap. She then stepped forward to give her daughter a kiss on the cheek. “At least just consider it, Annaleigh. You don’ have to make a decision right now.”

“I’ll come too, I want to say ‘hi’ to the boys,” Jasmine said. Whether or not she was trying to get away from the tension, Lance wasn’t sure, but he had the sudden urge to follow her. “And learn more about this one.”

“Um, ok,” Mika said as Jasmine grabbed his arm, pulling him across the stage. He also looked relieved to be leaving.

“I thought she would like my suggestions, I apologize,” Johnny said, shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot.

“You don’ have to apologize on behalf of our daughter,” Caroline said, giving him a patient smile. “We knew she’d act this way.” She let out a tinkling laugh. “The first pageant I put her in, she got on stage and cried she was so nervous.” Johnny chuckled good naturedly as she turned her attention towards Lance and Darren. “I know my bein’ here must be a surprise.”

“Well…it’s jus’ that you haven’ really been around,” Darren replied as politely as he could. A muscle in his jaw twitched. “And…she needed you there.”

“I know, it was jus’ her father and I couldn’ work through our problems,” Caroline replied with a sad smile. “I want ta thank the two of you for lookin’ after her. We both know it’s not an easy thing ta do, but we really appreciate it.” She gave Johnny a smile. “An’ you as well.”

“It’s my pleasure,” Johnny replied with a small smile.

“Especially now that she’s out on the road,” Ryan added in a gruff voice. “Things were gettin’ hard at home an’ I didn’ want her ta see it an’ worry.” He sucked in a deep breath of air. “Caroline an’ I are getting’ a divorce.”

“I filed this mornin’,” Caroline added.

Lance made a humming sound in the back of his throat. Darren bowed his head, cupping the back of his neck with his hands. He walked a few paces away before coming back. “Are you sure?” Lance asked quietly. “I mean…there’s nothing you two could do to…I don’t know, fix things? Therapy?”

“We’ve tried,” Ryan replied. “But, what happened, what I did is jus’ too hard ta forget.” He looked back and forth between the two of them. “I had an affair when I was on the road with my band and I had gotten another woman pregnant. It’s why I was so…resilient ta have her join y’all. I didn’ want her ta find out ‘bout what I had done.”

“I know this may come as a shock to you, and it puts you in a terrible position as her friends, but you can’ tell her,” Caroline said quietly. “This is something Ryan and I have to tell her.”

“Um…we already knew,” Darren replied after a moment of silence. Ryan blinked in surprise.

“My dad told us…” Lance trailed off, angling his head to the side. “We know that Ace has a half-brother and we know about your affair.” He ran his fingers through his hair. “He just wanted me to look out for her like I promised you.”

“I appreciate that Lance,” Ryan said, clapping his hands together.

“But, Jazzy doesn’ know,” Darren added. “Just the two of us, I swear.” He swallowed thickly. “I won’t tell Ace. I promise.”

“Me neither,” Lance quickly agreed. “I don’t think I could.” He let out a heavy sigh through his nose, looking at the spot Mika was previously standing in before looking at Ryan, and then finally at Johnny. “It’s Mika isn’t it? That time I interrupted you talking to him?” Johnny slowly nodded. “You knew this whole time?”

“I put him in the band because he wanted to meet her,” Johnny explained, a pained expression crossing his face. Darren let out a low whistle before silently cursing. “He didn’t tell me until after he auditioned. I didn’t have any reason to not believe him. He told me that he had called Ryan a couple of times when she first got down to Florida to talk to her, but he found out that she had gone down there.”

“I didn’ tell him why she was there; he said he was an old friend of hers, and with how often y’all were runnin’ ‘round as kids, I didn’ know who she was with all the time,” Ryan explained. “As long as she was with y’all I knew she’d be ok. I was in contact with his mother for a little while, maybe she told him, I don’ know.”

“His audition was really good and if hiring him meant that not only did he get to meet his sister, but I got a good musician out of it…” Johnny trailed off, holding his hands out beside him as if they were a scale. He raised and lowered them before dropping his arms down to his sides, sliding his hands into his jeans pockets.

“I tried keepin’ up with child support for him, but the older he got and the older Annaleigh got…” Ryan let out a heavy sigh. “I’m not proud of my sins and I’ve tried to learn from them, but it’s been hard. Everythin’ she’s been sendin’ home has been to pay off what I owe and…I took some money from her mother as well.”

This was just too much. There was no way Lance would be able to keep all of that a secret from his best friend when he still had the tour looming over his head. He lifted his hands to his face, brushing them over his face before running his fingers through his hair.

 “We won’t tell her,” Lance said around a heavy sigh.

“Tell me what?”

Shit. Panic clutched at Lance’s heart. Darren let out another curse, a hand flying up to cover his mouth. Ryan and Caroline shared a look of panic before facing their daughter. Lance’s  feet tingled, urging him to make a getaway, but he couldn’t move.

“Tell me what?” Annaleigh replied, carrying her guitar over them. Jasmine was talking animatedly with Mika as the other members of NSYNC came out from backstage, ready to rehearse.

“Tell you that—“

“Don’t Darren,” Lance said, interrupting his friend, shooting him an annoyed look. Darren’s eyes widened.

“We’re her best friends, we shoulda told her a long time ago,” Darren shot back.

“It’s not your place to tell her, we shoulda done it ourselves,” Caroline said to the two boys despite taking a couple of steps closer towards her daughter. “Look, Sweet Pea—“

“Just tell me what’s goin’ on,” Annaleigh said, looking back and forth between the two of them. Lance saw a hopeful look come to her eyes as she shifted her gaze over to Johnny, Darren, and then himself. His lips parted slightly, but he stayed silent. “Are y’all getting’ back together?”

“No, sweetie, we’re not,” Ryan replied. “We’ve jus’ grown apart.” Caroline snorted. “There are some mistakes we can’ move on from.”

“I’ve tried movin’ on,” Caroline snapped, snapping her attention to her husband. “But you jus’ can’t ignore—“

“They’re getting’ divorced, ok?” Darren blurted out. “That’s it. They’re gettin’ a divorce.”

“Darren,” Lance cried. His next words died on his lips as he turned to face Annaleigh who was slowly shaking her head back and forth.

“You jus’ moved out, ma, tha’s all,” she said, a small smile coming to her face. “You can come back. We want ya, too. Right, dad?”

“That’s right,” Ryan agreed after a moment of silence. “But, sweetie, that’s not—“

“See?” Annaleigh turned back towards Darren. “They’re not gettin’ a divorce. Dad wants her back an’…an’ so do I. We can be a family again.” A pleading tone came to her voice. “Ma? Dad?”

“I’m sorry, Sweet Pea, but I filed for divorce this mornin’,” Caroline said. Lance bowed his head as the words reached his ears. It was one thing to see the divorce papers, but to actually hear the words? He knew that had to crush her and he couldn’t force himself to look over at her.

“But…why?” Annaleigh asked. Lance pressed his lips tightly together. He looked over at Darren out of the corner of his eyes. He was shifting his weight from foot to foot. No one said a word. “Someone answer me! Why are you gettin’ a divorce?” The silence continued to stretch on.

“They’re splittin’ up because—“

“It’s not your place to say, son,” Johnny said, putting a hand on Darren’s shoulder. “You should let her parents tell her.”

“They won’ ever tell her—“

“Not with how well her father thinks he keep a secret from the family and think everythin’ will be ok,” Caroline snapped.

“I’ve apologized and apologized for that,” Ryan said through clenched teeth. “But, now’s not tha time—“

“She wants ta know why we’re gettin’ divorced, I think now’s tha time,” Caroline replied with a shriek of laughter. “You think she’s gonna be able to focus on anythin’ now that we brought this up? We can’ just not tell her, but hat seems ta be your answer for everythin’.”

Lance clenched his teeth tightly together as the arguing went on around him. He could feel the words jumbling in his chest, climbing up his throat. It was hard to breathe, his chest was hurting. The shouting was getting too loud. He just wanted it all to stop.

“He had an affair!” Lance blurted out, practically shouting the words. “He had an affair, ok? He got another woman pregnant. You have a half-brother.”

Lance sucked in a deep breath of air before letting it out of his mouth. Darren scratched the back of his neck, Johnny adjusted the cap on his head, Caroline had her hands crossed over her heart with tears shining in her eyes, and Ryan looked like he wanted to comfort his daughter, but stood stock still.

“Oh,” Annaleigh said. Her voice was barely above a whisper. He could hear her words shake just slightly.

“Ace.” Darren stepped towards her, stopping when she took a step back. And another. And another.

“Say something,” Lance prompted, his voice cracking.

Annaleigh looked over at him, her eyes narrowing slightly. She loudly sniffed before swallowing thickly stepping over to him. He let out a grunt when she shoved her guitar into his chest. “Play your own fuckin’ music,” she snapped before storming off stage.

Everyone was silent until Chris said, "So...are we allowed to curse around her, now?"